Any gender can come to our work menopause cafe

@Neenawneenaw76
Whilst I can see where you’re coming from, perhaps the fact that a woman has been awarded £1000’s as a direct result of sex discrimination which included things like her boss commenting about being ‘menopausal’ indicates that men also need educating about the subject. I’d also add that younger women would also benefit.

If you're asking a) why talk about it at work and b) why include men:

why not? Menopause is a fact of life. And it rarely gets talked about as openly as it should. Thre are adjustments that workplaces can reasonably make so that, for eg, menopausal women who get the hot flashes aren't seated next to a radiator, or that there is ample provision for clean, accessible toilets with adequate sinks etc for the inevitable last hurrah that your uterus gives you with zero warning (sometimes several)

So that you can, as i did, have a small fan on your desk and people don't endlessly move it, switch it off without asking, or joke about it to all and sundry. Men, particularly men in leadership positions can do a great deal to facilitate this.

After long struggles we have made great progress in making accommodations for pregnant women in the workplace and there is no reason we can't do it at the other end of the cycle.

I do like cake though. Cake day can stay.

Why the fuck would anyone want to talk about their menopause with a big group of work people, of either sex??
I mean, I get having a moan to you mate at work or whatever, but work sanctioned "safe spaces" to talk about hot flushes and vaginal dryness? No thank you.
I particularly hate the idea of male senior people getting all earnest about "supporting the menopausal ladies" at work.
I need "support" with meno at work about as much as the middle aged men need support with their male pattern baldness and impotence. I certainly don't want my age used as an excuse not to promote me! All this shit just makes me want to scream "get out of my knickers and leave me alone!"
That might just be me though..

I think this is something that should be expanded really. A support group that is only for women experiencing the menopause/peri menopause and something else that is open to all- including men- to help understand what it is, dispel myths etc. Here’s plenty of men living and working with menopausal women who have no idea about it and I’d (personally) like it to be something men can support partners/colleagues with and remove the taboo that menopause (or periods) is something men shouldn’t talk about. It’s a normal part of most women’s lives.

No sex is the right word. Gender is just the envelope - completely irrelevant to the letter inside.

it sounds ok to me because gender counts trans men and NB.

obviously a trans woman has no right to be there, but its gender not sex so should mean all those who are female of a certain age.

I'd be happy if our work had a Menopause Café (we have other things that also get called Café - mostly because that implies informal meetings rather than cake)

I would want to know the purpose though. Are we women sharing tips about working while being menopausal? (peers) or are we sharing with other women, who are not yet menopausal what it actually is, to prepare them? (women) or is it to work through ideas about how a workplace can be made more menopausal woman friendly (men included)

Because of the 3 i quite like all of them. But the one that will bring a culture change to an organisation is the last one where men are invited. Even if it is restricted to men in leadership positions.

What’s the goal of this cafe? If it’s to raise awareness, all welcome.

If it’s for mutual sharing and support, then women only. I am pretty open about menopause but not prepared to discuss symptoms in front of every Tom, Dick or Harry (or self-styled Harriet).

We've just had some online sessions that were sent to all staff, regardless of sex. It was made clear on them that whilst it's women (and transmen who are still biologically female) who will personally be going through the menopause, it recognised that men are also our colleagues and will also be living with a menopausal female at some stage of their life (obviously if they are straight). It was very well handled and was very popular. The idea was initially suggested by a very senior male member of staff who thought it was an important topic.

There was also a separate webinar for line managers about how best to sensitively manage any staff struggling or looking for help and how best to avoid ending up on the wrong end of an employment tribunal.

OP. I'm wondering if you work where I work!

We have had a Menopause Awareness/information session which was open to everyone.

Out of that, it was decided to set up a menopause cafe for peer support. One of my male colleagues said that it should not exclude men because we need to be inclusive in all areas. I put him straight on that one.

but fine if meopausal trans men, NB or whatever want to come too

Yes absolutely. They are female.

Odd wording but yeah I’d expect it to be single sex but fine if meopausal trans men, NB or whatever want to come too. A transwoman coming would be creep AF.

I went to a menopause event and a young trans man spoke about how he had the same symptoms and needed support too.

It was very moving, but, probably not in the way that he had hoped.

I hope it's going to be centring middle aged female people. There have been some worrying attempts recently to include "all people who experience changes in their hormones" or something like that to crowbar in trans people.

Anyone got an answer

If this is aimed at transmen too, my understanding is that transmen take testosterone and therefore the consequences of that medication may mean a 'woman's' menopause doesn't happen. That being the case, inclusion is now just that, no aim at any group in particular just anything to do with women is open to everyone. Pointing that out because the impact on men in everything seems to be minimal

Gender is irrelevant. The ‘pause only comes for women.

Generally it's a space for people to talk about menopause so for instance at some of the ones I've been to men have attended to find out how to help their partners. However it is not menopause training - are they offering the training separately?

Is it actually called "Menopause Cafe"? As those are set up as a free for everyone informal non educational chat about menopause.

www.menopausecafe.net/

They may just mean “men and women are welcome” in a finding out more about menopause and how to support colleagues, partners, friends, etc, way. What else does the invite say about the purposes of the “cafe”.?

I can't imagine many women going through the unpleasant time that is the menopause would want to discuss these symptoms in front of anyone but others who will experience similar.

n the same way hetro people are welcome at LGBT events/meetings

And in the same way the LGBT+ people may then begin to opt out because they are not a spectator sport. And Pride having become a straight corporate festival that a lot of LGBT+ people now avoid.

It's all very lovely, but it has its downsides and it does begin to exclude the core group via this lovely mission creep.