Woman on ward - complains about male patient. Is discharged.

I think both women and men need protection , respect and dignity while in a vulnerable position. Trusts and their clinical staff need to understand this as do the wider NHS organisations.

I was in hospital for a week in a mixed sex ward. This is 2 years ago, it was shit. So this issue is clouded as it’s not actually guaranteed that the space is female only.

I really wish they’d change the rules though, it was awful. Really undignified.

Nurses are in an impossible situation. There is one sex marker on health care record ie male or female. This is changed by GP on patient request. It's a bit more complicated than that but essentially is self ID. Ie no medical transition or assessment. I am a nurse. I am concerned for patient dignity, privacy for women and how we care for young trans. Rest assured, I'm confident I'm not the only one. In my most recent conversation with equality and diversity lead in my trust I was reminded of A) trust trans policy B) risk of private prosecution and significant fine for breach of policy ie talking about patient trans status (with colleagues) without patients consent to do so - even in context of risk C) NMC code of conduct and risk of losing my pin (aka my ability to continue to be employed as a nurse). So essentially threatened.. This was when I raised concern about our care for a young adult who is trans. Lawks knows what ward staff face when raising concerns about needs of women! I'm heartbroken for the women requesting our help when they feel vulnerable.

This behaviour is surely against the law? Aren't medical staff duty bound to treat anyone in need regardless of beliefs etc? And also keep them safe?
Doesn't seem like they have acted within the law regarding patient welfare and safety!!

So much sympathy for Gill

A few years ago, when unwell enough to be effectively trapped in my hospital bed (multiple monitors; catheter; & several IV bags hanging) I had a terrifying night when a male visitor to the ward managed to conceal himself at the end of visiting hours to spend the night with the female relative they were there to see. Who was in the bed opposite me.

I’m sure he was a perfectly nice man & he was just worried about his relative. (Who was not, to be clear, desperately physically unwell, but she greatly disliked hospitals & was mentally not very well). Thing is, while my logical brain kept telling me that, my lizard-brain was so terrified (especially when he left her cubicle to use the toilet) that the alarms on my heart monitor went off multiple times. I was so afraid that I didn’t dare say anything to my nurse any of the multiple times she came to see me during the night either to deal with the monitor saying my heart was identifying as that of a rabbit or just to do my usual medications etc.

I reported it on my transfer to another ward & there was a review & retraining (etc); & I got an in-person apology from the ward matron; & a written one from the hospital’s CEO.

It scares me to think that I could be put in almost the same situation but I would, rather than the hospital improving their safeguarding, face gaslighting, accusations of being akin to a racist - and even, it seems, having my health (or even life) put at risk.

All to validate the feelings of some male individuals who think female is a feeling not a fact.

No thank you.

Staff who are prepared to discharge a sick patient for an ideology need to question their career choice.

Correction, I've found his account and he appears to be in Dublin, not the NHS.

How has it come to be, that the person with the issue gets to dictate how the rest of the world has to behave for fear of upsetting that one person?

The one person with the issue is of the class of humans which matter, the rest are of the class that don't. However they 'identify', the whole structure is built to meet the needs of the important kind of human. This ideology really does bring home the reality of misogyny, and how deeply embedded it is.

Will this be extended to patients in mental facilities who believe that they have 100 personalities inside them?
What about if someone thinks they are Napoleon or Queen Victoria? Will it be phobic of the mental health team to deny the reality and indulge the "feeling" instead and tell them that. yes, you ARE Queen Victoria and your feelings are true and valid.
Or do you think they would recognise this person needed help and not gaslight the rest of the ward into complying and reinforcing the delusion?
How has it come to be, that the person with the issue gets to dictate how the rest of the world has to behave for fear of upsetting that one person?

m.youtube.com/watch?v=KpfTBEXqGQM

The thing I find sad as well is that the rights don't apply to mental health.

If you look on twitter someone posted the rights we have with regard to single sex environments. It basically says it applies to sleeping arrangements and bathrooms/toilets, but then goes on to say that on MH wards women should have access to 'women-only day spaces' yet they don't have the right to be in a women only sleeping arrangement - why?

@nothingcomestonothing

You might be interested in this group, if you haven't already found them.

twitter.com/sexnotgendernm/status/1485968719671173124?s=21

I hope you and your female colleagues are able to speak about this. I can't imagine how bloody awful it must be for you. Like forced betrayal? I'm not sure the best way to describe it. It must take a great deal to do your job under these ridiculous, unsafe policies.

Having had the misfortune to read the Transgender Care Policy in the large teaching hospital which is my employer, I can confirm it unequivocally states that staff have to gaslight patients. It doesn't use those words, of course. But it is clear nonetheless. If we don't, we are breaking patient confidentially (of the trans patient, no one gives a shit about the others), and will be subject to disciplinary proceedings and possibly reporting for hate crime. Its grim for adult human females in hospital as staff, as well as patients.

We are being gaslit. It's enough to drive a woman insane. Mysoginistic bullying on a huge scale.

We really are living in a dystopian world as predicted by many authors.
Wrong-speak and wrong-think will get you booted out of hospital when you are sick.
Terrifying.

I was once admitted to a completely mixed ward. When the shift changed, the new ward leader/sister (sorry not v clued up about job titles) insisted that all the men were moved to one side and all the women to the other, with screens down the middle.

I was surprised how reassuring this was.

@KittenKong I would have a bloody stroke.

It’s day!
Noooo kitten, it’s night
But I can see the sun high in the sky!
Nooo kitten, there’s no sun there
It’s light!
It’s dark!

When I was little my siblings would tell me mad lies to wind me up - I have never been able to keep quiet when someone tells me a blatant porky to my face.

Just as an aside...

When I had an op last year, they put inflating things around my shins to stop blood clots. The ruddy things inflated & deflated all night long, which stopped me sleeping properly & (with the after-effects of the anaesthetic) may explain this:

I woke in the early hours & pressed the call button as I thought the inflating things had fallen off & were on the floor, where they were still noisily going about their business. The nurse came in & told me it was OK, they were on my legs.

Me: No, they're on the floor.
Nurse: I promise you, they're where they should be.
Me: No, they're on the floor.
Nurse helps me to see them ON MY LEGS.
I consider this.
Me: But they're on the floor!

Another nurse comes in to see what's going on, & they say dreams like this are common after an op. I've seen the inflatey things on my legs, I know the nurses are right, yet I'm lying there silently furious that they won't take me seriously when I'm right & they're on the floor.

I'm so, so sorry to those nurses.

I'm pretty sure that I read the guidance for staff from NHS trusts (Glasgow and a couple of others I think) that tells staff that they must lie to female patients

FFS. I don’t know which emotion is bigger for me reading that - fear, anger, sadness. I have no other words.

I'm in Scotland a day have been in hospital many times due to chronic illness/disability.
My closest hospital has multi bed wards and I flatly refuse to go there and whilst this isn't, or hasn't yet been the main reason, it's one of them.
I insist on being taken to the next nearest, (5 minutes difference), which is all private rooms.

For many years, El Cucuy have inspired legends in Spanish speaking cultures of a bogeyman-like namesake who punishes those that have done wrong.