Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

My very first TWA encounter....

31 replies

SunnyDelite · 10/01/2022 17:05

Received my first ever message from a TWA tr0ll on Facebook today... is this a badge of honour or should I be worried? :) Posted on my business page and obviously taken from a like on Graham's page...

My very first TWA encounter....
OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
SunnyDelite · 11/01/2022 18:59

That's good to know!

OP posts:
EatSleepRantRepeat · 11/01/2022 18:31

That's alright @SunnyDelite - I think they usually take a look at their posting history on the back end so they'll see if they're also using their account to harass anyone else. Fb's terms of service aren't strong enough though IMO. If someone can go to the police over a picture of a suffragette ribbon on a lamppost and get taken seriously, hopefully they'll do something about "Bob"

SunnyDelite · 11/01/2022 17:59

I just went to report "Bob" for bullying and harassment and was very disappointed that I couldn't add any details.... :(

OP posts:
SunnyDelite · 11/01/2022 17:48

I will report her to Facebook, though....

OP posts:
SunnyDelite · 11/01/2022 17:47

Thank you to all you lovely women for your replies (I'd do a bunch of flowers but I don't know how!) I feel a bit of a fraud as I think maybe I'm not as scared as I should be. My thinking is that "Bob" has got names from "likes" on Graham's Facebook page. And that there are a lot more women that are much more openly Terfy than me. So if I ignore "Bob", she's probably already harassing someone else, maybe someone who's on Twitter so she has more opportunities... Perhaps she's targeted lots of women on Facebook and been reported already?
I'm not really bothered about my business as it's a bit rubbish anyway and I get most of my income from my pension. But "Bob" is not to know that..... I don't feel personally threatened at the moment and will wait to see if there's any escalation before I take any more action. I don't expect to see blue-hairs with placards outside my house any time soon, but will keep you posted! :) (and I'd love to see more of Mary Bourke! :) )

OP posts:
LostMyLastHatfulOfWords · 11/01/2022 17:20

I'm glad you are going to report it.

You are strong - and not easily intimidated - and self-employed, but this person is clearly trying to hit someone vulnerable. This is bullying.

If this is an example of 'being kind' then we really are in an Orwellian dystopia where: “War is peace / freedom is slavery" etc. !

NancyDrawed · 11/01/2022 16:45

It would help if I attached the link...

NancyDrawed · 11/01/2022 16:44

@Pudmyboy

I hope you are okay OP, I am not on FB/twatter so cannot comment on safety but others obviously understand the repercussions better. I just wanted to add: doesn't terf mean 'tired of explaining real feminism'? and could you tell Bob they are a Smurf: 'Sexist Misogynist Undermining Real Feminism'? (both cribbed from a comedienne whose name I cannot recall, a link to a clip was on Mumsnet a good while ago.) Keep safe Flowers
Mary Bourke Terf vs Smurf

This is a shorter clip than the one that was posted before (I remember the one you mean, this has that segment in it.

Pudmyboy · 11/01/2022 16:11

I hope you are okay OP, I am not on FB/twatter so cannot comment on safety but others obviously understand the repercussions better.
I just wanted to add: doesn't terf mean 'tired of explaining real feminism'? and could you tell Bob they are a Smurf: 'Sexist Misogynist Undermining Real Feminism'?
(both cribbed from a comedienne whose name I cannot recall, a link to a clip was on Mumsnet a good while ago.)
Keep safe Flowers

CuriousaboutSamphire · 11/01/2022 12:22

@SunnyDelite

Thanks for all the good advice. I'll look into reporting her to Facebook for bullying and harassment....
And the police.

Your ability to earn a living has been deliberately targetted. You have been maligned, deliberatley, on multiple occasions. He has picked what he thinks will be a soft target. All you have to do to prove him wrong is take screenshots and report him to the police.

What else can he do? You haven't done anything illlegal. He has!

He has scared you, made you fear repercussions, he may start cyber stalking youy. Your business will suffer. HE IS SCARING YOU.

The more SCARED you are the more the police wil have to take you seriously!

I have a plan in my head for if this ever happens to me, I too am self employed. And I will have a melt down, cry all over the nearest policeMAN and weep buckets of feraful tears whilst tremulously declaring that I will not be scared out of my home or my work with a brave smile plastered on! Then I will get on with being a clever woman and will garner all the feminist support and information I can.

If men like Bob want to use their masculinity to scare me into submission I will use my 'frail femininity' right back at them! Bastards.

VelvetChairGirl · 11/01/2022 11:59

@Truthlikeness

I've spent too much time on GC websites and forgotten that Terf is supposed to be an insult Grin
Yeah maybe message then back and say I am aware he is a T.E.R.F arent we all tried of explaining reality to fuckwits at this point?, you could always ignore the links if your overwhelmed by it all and need a break.

that'll confuse em.

SunnyDelite · 11/01/2022 11:58

Thanks for all the good advice. I'll look into reporting her to Facebook for bullying and harassment....

OP posts:
KittenKong · 11/01/2022 11:33

I’d report ‘Bob’ too. The more they do this, the more they show their true faces (even through they hide behind anonymous cartoons and names).

beastlyslumber · 11/01/2022 11:00

OP, I wouldn't just ignore it. He obviously has pegged you as someone vulnerable and when you didn't respond to the previous message, he was encouraged to do more.

I would take screenshots and report him. I would maybe put a short statement on your page that you are being harrassed and you have reported and will escalate as necessary.

So sorry you have been targeted. These bastards just want to shut women up.

DoubleTweenQueen · 11/01/2022 10:49

@SunnyDelite Is that not a hate crime? Accusations/libel and seeking to directly damage your business?

Abhannmor · 11/01/2022 10:46

I agree with Curious. This is looking like harassment. Needs to be reported. Solidarity from Ireland Flowers

SunnyDelite · 11/01/2022 10:23

Well, I've had another message on my business page from my mate "Bob Smith" (pronoun "her"). I deleted yesterday's but I might just let this one stand as I don't think my prospective customers will a) see it b) understand it c) be on their side or d) care one way or the other. If I hear from "Bob" again, I will block her. I'm certainly not going to engage in any way....... I'm quite flattered to be termed an activist because mostly I just cheer from the sidelines :)

My very first TWA encounter....
OP posts:
CuriousaboutSamphire · 10/01/2022 19:14

And if that poster pops up again report them to Facebook. Search their pages and see if you can glean where they actually are and report them to the police for harrassment (it would be a second post, so repeated behaviour), scaring the shit out of you, threatening, sorry, malicious communication.

At some point some of us have to fight back. But it is bloody scary!

SunnyDelite · 10/01/2022 19:12

Good ideas there. I've been selling for about 13 years now and never had to worry about anything like this before. The world's gone mad.... :(

OP posts:
Goatsaregreat · 10/01/2022 19:06

OP,
Maybe google the buyer? Check their online presence and then if they appear to be a trans extremist, refund and cancel the transaction. If it's Etsy that stops them leaving feedback.

EatSleepRantRepeat · 10/01/2022 19:00

If you're concerned, could you get yourself set up with a po box address for any correspondence/returns? Might be a good idea anyway as a small seller, so many head cases out there...

SunnyDelite · 10/01/2022 18:57

My business is just a little outlet for my hand-made crafts and I'm owner, manager, manufacturer, tea-maker and cleaner :) Definitely not going to sack any of them!
I have just deleted the post, as I don't want to attract attention to myself. I'm a bit worried that they might buy something to get my address (I have just sold the cheapest thing in my shop), but generally I think there are bigger fish to fry than me and they won't get much satisfaction out of harassing me. I will stay alert, though.
My first denunciation as a witch! I'm quite proud... :)

OP posts:
NitroNine · 10/01/2022 18:11

So some random is trawling GC pages - or Glinner’s, at the very least - & trying to get women who’ve engaged with them in even the smallest way fired for their legally protected views? Truly it is a constant joy & delight to live in the age of Beeee Kiiinnnnddd!!! Hmm

Is there any risk at all to your business from their nonsense-posting? Does FB offer you any support for dealing with vexatious posts? Doesn’t matter if they’re all TWAW, if they offer anything like that you can approach them with concerns that someone [with no links to you/your area/your business] left a message demanding you be fired. The content of the message sounds as if it was a copy/paste job, too, so while the message about you went to a page you run for a business you own, for some people this article might be contacting their actual employer. Also, if it wasn’t your business page that did the liking (as in, if you liked it with your personal FB account), they’ve put some work in to find you; & they could have guessed wrong, even if you have an incredibly unusual name: their guessing games/playing detective (followed by judge, jury & executioner) could have real-life consequences.

Make sure you take care of yourself: it might feel different as you think about it more; & if the person demanding you fire yourself is local to you that might can be unsettling.

Truthlikeness · 10/01/2022 18:03

I've spent too much time on GC websites and forgotten that Terf is supposed to be an insult Grin

PatsArrow · 10/01/2022 18:01

I don't these tactics really have the swift result they used to. It's pathetic.
As the debates move on and more adults enter the room the TRAs are left with no other MO.

I would ignore as much as possible.