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Original poster

Motherhood, womanhood, gender and what that means to a child.

33 replies

NeedsCharging · 22/12/2021 18:07

I ask that those who choose to comment do so in line with MNHQ rules.

As those on this bored are aware the drive to remove the word women/mother from everyday language and medical language is an ongoing issue. I see threads on this topic that discuss how that impacts women.
Today a well known newspaper ran a story concerning a transman who has given birth and their personal views on the language used to address them by their medical team.

While that language is an issue I would like to discuss the impact it may have on a child if/when they are told they do not have a mother.
Specifically will the child struggle with the concept of no mother at all?
Will that positively or negatively affect them as they have a mother in the biological sense but not allowed to say that?
I am interested in views about the child not any views about the parents.

Pleases do not delete this MNHQ as it isn't a TAAT but a question regarding parentage and how that affects children.

OP posts:
VerveClique · 22/12/2021 18:42

One thing we know about women, is that we were all born from one, surely. Are we going to take this knowledge away from children now?

ArabellaScott · 22/12/2021 18:40

The child is likely to be raised in an environment where concepts like biological sex are going to be conspicuous by their absence.

I don't know how that will play out by the time the child reaches an age old enough to understand sex and reproduction.

To discover one's father figure is actually one's mother? I can't really imagine the impact on a child.

Linguini · 22/12/2021 18:40

If a child is told they have two fathers, but one of the fathers gestated, gave birth to and nursed them, the other father basically ejaculated, this child will have no concept of...
Well. The list is rather long. I did try but I gave up.

Leafstamp · 22/12/2021 18:35

I think it would be very ill-advised to tell a child they don’t have a mother. If a birth mother has decided to identify as a man then the child will need to be told this, but also that the person is still their birth mother.

For a child I guess it’s explaining it all very sensitively and age appropriately a bit like you might if the child was adopted/in foster care or who had lost a parent through death, prison or other absence.

I still don’t understand how if you think you’re a man you would want to be pregnant and birth a child.

Delphinium20 · 22/12/2021 18:35

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Original poster
NeedsCharging · 22/12/2021 18:30

Surely it must be deeply damaging to the child to be lied to in this way, and when they are old enough to know they have been lied to.

I think so.
My niece was adopted at 6 months. She is 8 now and fully aware mummy and daddy chose her and she has a bio mum and dad so know who her bio parents exist but ate not about. The reasons why will be explained age appropriately when needed.

However the above situation removes the mother completely which is not factually true and in my view suits the parent not the child.

OP posts:
ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 22/12/2021 18:26

Surely it must be deeply damaging to the child to be lied to in this way, and when they are old enough to know they have been lied to.

gailforce1 · 22/12/2021 18:17

I read that article in the Daily Mail and that was exactly the question that sprang to my mind.
When the child learns about biology and that females give birth - how is that child's parentage going to be explained?
I hope that robust mental health help will be on hand.