Books for gender non conforming 6 yo

79 replies

JustcameoutGC · 12/12/2021 08:09

Morning all. My 6 yo daughter is not a very girly girl. She likes minecraft, coding and is beginning to prefer the company of boys. So far so good. However, gender stereotypes are so reinforced from such an early age (girls do sparkly unicorns, boys do football) she is beginning to say things like she must be a boy, or sometimes she is a girl and sometimes she is a boy. I have spoken to her about it at length, and as far as i can tell, there is no sense of gender dysphoria present. She is just adding 2 and 2 and getting 5. Boys like minecraft, i like minecraft, maybe i am a boy.

Does anyone have any good suggestions for books i can get her that show that boys and girls can and should wear and do anything.

If we focused on breaking down gender stereotypes, we wouldn't be in this mess to begin with.
I have already picked up My body is Me.

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PatsArrow · 12/12/2021 08:45

I recommend both these books.

My dd never even owned a dress....liked Dr Who, dragons, Sci-Fi and MineCraft. She's now 17. Def still not 'girlie' (never really sure what that means, but she never wears skirts or dresses, only occasionally wears a tiny bit of make up etc) but she's embraced womanhood and understands that women are many different things.

Only once my Dd said to me "I want to be a boy" when she was young. I just asked "why do you say that?". She said "Boys get to do cooler stuff". So that opened up a conversation about how girls can do/be anything,

I'm hoping your DD will get there too.

MsGoodenough · 12/12/2021 08:42

@Echobelly

'The Most Magnificent Thing' is a book that features a non girly-girl who likes inventing stuff.

Similarly 'Ada Twist, Scientist' or 'Rosie Greer, Engineer'

Film-wise the girl in 'Inside Out' is again, not very girly and loves ice hockey

Couldn't agree more with these recommendations. Dd loves these books. I have a similar dd and always focus on biology 'you're a girl because you have eggs in your tummy'. When she occasionally says she's more like a boy we talk about how stupid it us that some people think boys and girls have to behave in a certain way.

Do also loves the 13 storey treehouse books. The main characters are two boys but there's also a girl character who isn't remotely 'girly'. The books are really funny and got dd into reading independently.

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 12/12/2021 08:25

I would look at books by Hilary McKay. She writes books for a variety of age groups, mostly with female protagonists, and they are always 3-dimensional people who like a variety of things

Echobelly · 12/12/2021 08:19

'The Most Magnificent Thing' is a book that features a non girly-girl who likes inventing stuff.

Similarly 'Ada Twist, Scientist' or 'Rosie Greer, Engineer'

Film-wise the girl in 'Inside Out' is again, not very girly and loves ice hockey

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