Trans ideology and mental health

Just earlier today on a different thread from someone new there was a post saying every 6 months or so there’s a new thread here from someone about the toll this is taking on women’s mh. Search for the other ones, you’ll understand you’re not alone.

Don’t interact with predators. Doesn’t matter if online or if trans or tra’s or whatever. Live by that rule, at least until stronger.

Imho get a new therapist. If you can’t trust them there’s no therapeutic benefit.

Someone posted info about local groups a while back- ressisters I think? Search and email to sign up to get new friends who understand. Find your local fb gc group and start going to whatever local meetings there are. There are other online gc groups other than here, but other posters would need to give details (I’m a snarky introvert).

Do you have dh/dp who gets it? This is the only person personally I would have tried to persuade to see my pov, if he didn’t get it the minute I explained. Otherwise I’d cut people loose, but honestly I’m not a helpful example when it comes to that because ^^ snarky introvert.

Start focusing on the huge positives going on within this. Sign up to conservatives for women so you can follow baroness Nicholson’s work to tackle this. Get familiar with books, Twitter, YouTube, websites etc from those who get it. Like Kathleen Stock, JKR, triggernometry and so on. Once you realise we are the majority, and become so familiar with the arguments to common sense, it becomes much more possible to cope. Stick with the positive changes with people waking up to this- like the bbc getting rid of stonewall- and avoid the scary ones for now.

And learn not to apologise. If you want to or need to say something just say it, don’t try to persuade anyone with it, stat facts or what you feel, with no disclaimer about not a transphobe yadda yadda support trans rights yadda yadda. It makes us come across like we have a reason to be apologetic, we don’t. Knowing facts is not transphobic, fighting for women’s rights should not come with a disclaimer.

And step back whenever you need to. I know it can feel all encompassing at times, but there’s plenty here taking action to not need every last voice every second of the day. It’s ok if you miss one petition or news article or crowd funder etc. Take a breather however works best for you. And I know that can be difficult once eyes are opened- going to the gym isn’t the same when you feel aware there could be tw ‘female penis’ in changing rooms or films/tv feel hyper charged with trans characters that have popped up specifically with a political agenda (as opposed to just trans people being visible while living their lives as they of course should) that suddenly ruin the relaxation from it, and so on. But find new ways if you need to and take care of yourself and your sanity first.

Rant here as needed. Ask for help with specific problems as needed.

OP, it can be very hard on one’s mental state. I have to step back from it from time to time as what is happening to women’s rights and language makes me so angry - and I am trying not to turn into my perpetually furious mother. (I have to be vigilant!) I am endlessly amazed by the ability of women like JKR and Maya to take so much abuse and so much absolutely shameless misrepresentation of their views by people who should know better, and continue with grace and dignity. I know all grace and dignity would leave the building if I were in their shoes.

So yes, try to take breaks, focus on the happiness you have in your life and generally try to channel Helen Joyce, Kathleen Stock, JK Rowling’s amazing zen beneficent yet kickass vibes.

We are so lucky to have so many amazing women fighting for us!

It is a shock and very hard on mental health, I find I can't unsee examples of the poor treatment of women and disregard of women's rights in the pursuit of this ideology now. And I discover new examples more than I want to.

Personally in the interests of my own mental health I have to take time off from actively thinking about it/engaging in any sort of activism. Although there are still constant unwanted reminders of how shitty things are for women I just focus on my own hobbies for a while - yoga, running etc. Things where you have to be in the moment and concentrating on what you're doing.

In terms of talking to people, I talked to a handful of very very trusted friends about it. I also accidentally discovered some GC people in my circle, through noticing their signatures on the BPAS letter, which was such a welcome surprise. More people than you think are critical of this ideology and the more it is dragged out into the sunlight the braver people feel. If you genuinely feel it would be a bad idea to bring up even peripherally with friends, you could join one of the in person grassroots networks so you have some like minded women to discuss in person with.