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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I used a male toilet today and I think I liked it!

41 replies

Redyellowblue34 · 09/10/2021 19:55

Following the debate closely and attempting to be part of the solution. Got some enquiring looks from other users but that was all. Rather like this new way. No long queues for the ‘toilet for people with a wide pelvis’.

OP posts:
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NiceGerbil · 11/10/2021 21:12

Maybe using the gents has impressed her so much she's gone the whole hog and is absent while taking an epically long man-dump.

Kindlynow · 11/10/2021 21:03

Not coming back, OP?

Biscoffee · 11/10/2021 04:52

@Mybalconyiscracking

Bleah! They all piss on the floor, no thanks!
I think the ones that do it just do it at home to mark out their territory and make a point.
NiceGerbil · 11/10/2021 04:18

Has OP been back?

I think not.

What a surprise.

PrincessNutella · 11/10/2021 04:12

Why penalize males who are doing the right thing?

NoNotMeNoSiree · 10/10/2021 19:21

@MolyHolyGuacamole

Well clearly you can't be terrified of being attacked in the loos by a man. Which is an argument that many use. Not helping your cause.
Exactly - 'so what's the argument, men stay out of our spaces as they're a threat to women and so as a protest I'll go into the men's and pee there? Somebody make it make sense Confused
DdraigGoch · 10/10/2021 17:03

@Mybalconyiscracking

Bleah! They all piss on the floor, no thanks!
Not so much where urinals are provided. Less far to aim.
BlueSlate · 10/10/2021 14:49

I have used male toilets very occasionally when I was a lot younger- say in my 20s.

I did so when the queues for the ladies loos were ridiculously long and I was at risk of am accident!

I always kept my head down, headed for the cubicle and left immediately.

I was aware that the men would feel uncomfortable and was only there out of necessity.

However, after speaking with men about it, about how unnerving it is to be stood at a urinal with strange men let alone a woman coming in etc, I never did it again and wouldn't.

Both sexes have the right to privacy from the opposite sex.

ArtemesiaK · 10/10/2021 09:55

I think a another good reason for keeping Ladies loos women only is to stop them from being colonised by fastidious men...
Can't imagine why any woman would go into a men's unless it's an emergency. You can even smell them from the outside.... :(

AICM · 10/10/2021 09:27

You're using the 'taste of your own medicine' argument.

That usually backfires and makes things worse.

Abhannmor · 10/10/2021 09:24

@NiceGerbil

Most men are fine. A large minority are iffy though.

I've been in the gents s couple times when young. When there was good reason.

Men hate it. Obviously. They don't want women in there any more than we want to open up single sex spaces.

The sex specific facilities give men a single sex space as well. Women's are way more important due to male strength aggression and obv propensity to all sorts of intimidating/ sexually motivated things they do to us.

But men do NOT want women bimbling in while they're at the urinal. They just don't.

Why did you do that?

You think they didn't notice?

Men avoid using the cubicles in general in pubs etc for s variety of reasons.

Male toilet etiquette is specific and followed.

I can't understand for a moment why this helps anything :/

Man here. I hate using urinals as I like to wipe and dry my bits after peeing. They are just squalid and yuk. Often just a glorified cattle trough into which a few bars of disinfectant smellies have been carelessly lobbed. Therefore I would be mortified if women were to be 'bimbling in' on a regular basis. What if I knew said woman , from the clinic or the school say? On the other hand, I've often been at crowded events where women have asked to use the men's as we stood at the wretched pissoir. Of course that's not a problem. How could you take offence in that circumstance. You are unlikely to meet the next door neighbour woman at Glasto for example. Or if a child is in tow? But back on point - women need their own toilets 🚻. And they need a lot more of them.
NiceGerbil · 10/10/2021 03:59

The bit you're missing OP.

Is that.

No one thinks all men are creepy weirdos, sex offenders etc.

The point is that the ones who ARE, given the opportunity to go to the women's. Will.

NiceGerbil · 10/10/2021 03:58

Most men are fine. A large minority are iffy though.

I've been in the gents s couple times when young. When there was good reason.

Men hate it. Obviously. They don't want women in there any more than we want to open up single sex spaces.

The sex specific facilities give men a single sex space as well. Women's are way more important due to male strength aggression and obv propensity to all sorts of intimidating/ sexually motivated things they do to us.

But men do NOT want women bimbling in while they're at the urinal. They just don't.

Why did you do that?

You think they didn't notice?

Men avoid using the cubicles in general in pubs etc for s variety of reasons.

Male toilet etiquette is specific and followed.

I can't understand for a moment why this helps anything :/

timeisnotaline · 10/10/2021 03:54

So one woman felt safe in one particular toilets, therefore it’s ok! That’s what people will jump on for this, whatever your intention OP. And I mean pro men in women’s toilets people. It’s the same argument as my husband is not a danger to women therefore men aren’t.

MolyHolyGuacamole · 10/10/2021 03:32

Well clearly you can't be terrified of being attacked in the loos by a man. Which is an argument that many use. Not helping your cause.

NiceGerbil · 10/10/2021 03:21

@Redyellowblue34

Following the debate closely and attempting to be part of the solution. Got some enquiring looks from other users but that was all. Rather like this new way. No long queues for the ‘toilet for people with a wide pelvis’.
Why did you do that?

The reason for me anyway is important!

MargaritaPie · 10/10/2021 01:55

@BootsMcToots

Got some enquiring looks from other users Well yes. That's part of why these men want to be in our toilets. So we have to look at them, and think about them and give them the attention that they so crave.
You think comments like this are helping your cause?
blublub · 09/10/2021 23:36

‘The world we live in’ Is exactly because of the inability to recognise and plan for the simple fact women are the weaker sex and do need protection. Men can rape, and as mentioned don’t come with a convenient badge to show which is which. But there’s enough of them that do, to warrant some protections being in place for women’s safety.

GreyhoundG1rl · 09/10/2021 23:30

[quote mineofuselessinformation]@GreyhoundG1rl; 'it's still unsafe to allow men to walk in at will and legitimately loiter there.'
Really? So you are tarring all men with the same brush.
No wonder we live in the world that we do.[/quote]
. I'm not tarring all men with the same brush, I'm pointing out that when you let them all in, you let the ones with dubious intent in, because there's no way to tell the difference.
They don't wear convenient badges.

mineofuselessinformation · 09/10/2021 23:21

@GreyhoundG1rl; 'it's still unsafe to allow men to walk in at will and legitimately loiter there.'
Really? So you are tarring all men with the same brush.
No wonder we live in the world that we do.

GreyhoundG1rl · 09/10/2021 22:58

[quote mineofuselessinformation]@GreyhoundG1rl, you've missed my point, which was that as long as everyone has privacy, it's not a problem.
If anyone has a problem with not being able to wash their hands in a singe-sex environment, that's another issue. (And I can understand it, but OP hasn't raised it here.)
So what's your point?[/quote]
I haven't missed your point at all. There are cubicles in the ladies for "privacy" also, but it's still unsafe to allow men to walk in at will and legitimately loiter there.
If we insist on using the men's, we can no longer insist on the ladies' being the sole preserve of women.

mineofuselessinformation · 09/10/2021 22:51

@GreyhoundG1rl, you've missed my point, which was that as long as everyone has privacy, it's not a problem.
If anyone has a problem with not being able to wash their hands in a singe-sex environment, that's another issue. (And I can understand it, but OP hasn't raised it here.)
So what's your point?

bluecandicane · 09/10/2021 22:49

I'm a female and I'm in the mens public loos daily cleaning them. The men don't care they just carry on and pee right next to me as I try to mop under the urinals. Some are either shy or try to be respectful and will go in the cubicles

MissCruellaDeVil · 09/10/2021 22:49

No No No, I wouldn't feel any safer going into a mens toilet than a man coming into a female only toilet. Men are entitled to their private spaces too, and by going into another sexes space is part of the problem which will lead to mixed spaces.

GreyhoundG1rl · 09/10/2021 22:41

@mineofuselessinformation

A few years back, dc2 and I went to an event (quite niche). We needed to go for a wee. The queue for the men's loos was much shorter then the women's. Other women had joined it before us. And we did too. The men in the queue were not troubled by it, we all went about our business and let each other get on with it. As long as you have privacy (a cubicle), I don't see the issue.🤷🏻‍♀️
The issue is that we want to keep women's loos single sex. For safety reasons. Swanning into the men's and proclaiming that there's no issue kind of undermines that.