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Original poster

I did it. I stepped up!

110 replies

RhubarbCrumbled · 27/09/2021 10:40

I'm in a development day meeting online and someone suggested we should all share our pronouns. I declined and THEY ASKED ME WHY! I asked why I should and was sent a link (sorry, I didn't copy it in time) and advised I read up about it.
I said I didn't share in the belief that required pronouns to be shared in the same way as I wouldn't insist on people sharing their religion. As a woman I felt excluded. And others who had already put up their pronouns removed them. The pressure to do it was removed. Im hoping this means people will think through what they're being asked to do in future!

It's a very shallow post, but usually I wouldn't stand up like this.

OP posts:
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PrincessNutella · 28/09/2021 16:47

You are a hero!!!!!!!! Five stars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Snog · 27/09/2021 23:09

Well done ⭐️
The voice of reason.

LarryVeest · 27/09/2021 21:05

@MistandMud

I am ancient enough that 'Oh, I'm a bit old for all that. Whatever you like' has worked quite well.

With my children, on the other hand, asking for a gender list and identifying keenly as a panromantic demiboi was quite enough to get them off the subject. Clearly they also think I'm too old for all that.

Heehee! Grin
Selkiesarereal · 27/09/2021 20:24

Well done, giving a voice to the many!

EmbarrassingAdmissions · 27/09/2021 20:24

To those wondering about who shares pronouns, Come on down, HMP Isle of Wight

Gender identity badges handed out at sex offender prison HMP Isle of Wight
…
The prison, which combines the category B facilities HMP Albany and HMP Parkhurst, unveiled purple badges which display pronouns such as “he/they”, “her/they” and “they/them”.

Another badge simply reads “ask me”.

In an official tweet, HMP Isle of Wight said: “In preparation for National Inclusion Week our equalities team have started distributing pronoun badges. What’s your #pronoun?”

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/e8b84afc-1f78-11ec-8cb7-e60ba8dbca61?shareToken=5d79cba1e8359751d6872a4030dc1541

SnoopyLights · 27/09/2021 20:20

Well done, you were brave and I am sure the other women who removed their pronouns after you spoke up appreciated your stand.

EmbarrassingAdmissions · 27/09/2021 20:14

@JollyHostess

Well done OP! I fear that day is inching nearer for me...it's started to creep into people's email signatures at work.

I definitely need to plan my "statement" because otherwise what comes out might be "no fucking way" or "over my dead body" 😂

I hope it doesn't come to this for many way in a post-Forstater world:

not if you're backed
not if I'm sacked
not for your please
not on my knees
not to a judge
I will not budge

Full poem: Iris Child

Disydoll12 · 27/09/2021 20:13

Brilliant 👏 👏 well done to you.

thinkingaboutLangCleg · 27/09/2021 20:07

OP should name change to This Rhubarb’s Not For Crumbling

Grin
JollyHostess · 27/09/2021 19:57

Well done OP! I fear that day is inching nearer for me...it's started to creep into people's email signatures at work.

I definitely need to plan my "statement" because otherwise what comes out might be "no fucking way" or "over my dead body" 😂

EmbarrassingAdmissions · 27/09/2021 19:43

@Joystir59

I wouldn't even know what 'sharing pronouns' would involve
Email sig file. An organisation's Sys Admin can turn them on for everyone for the Zoom name chryon. Meeting openers sometimes ask people to state them when they introduce themselves. Staff badges and lanyards. Some health trusts ask people to use them when they give their name to someone.

Etc.

Marmite27 · 27/09/2021 19:39

I was made to add mine even though I declined. I wish I’d have had a link to send.

In the end I went with ‘Any pronoun usually ascribed to an adult human female.’

HermioneWeasley · 27/09/2021 19:36

💐💐💐

YorkshireGirl35 · 27/09/2021 19:34

Well done you!

Joystir59 · 27/09/2021 19:29

I wouldn't even know what 'sharing pronouns' would involve

Cagedbirdsinging · 27/09/2021 19:23
Star
EmpressWitchDoesntBurn · 27/09/2021 19:12

Brilliant work, Rhubarb!

DdraigGoch · 27/09/2021 19:06

@Gastonia

And others who had already put up their pronouns removed them. Years ago, I was in a restaurant with my parents, and the food was terrible. My dad complained politely, the manager was quite rude and said "no-one else has complained." Immediately, the people at the next table complained as well, and then other diners. In fact, it turned out the chef was off that day, but everyone else had sat eating the truly awful food without saying anything! It's so difficult to be the first person to stand up, so I'm very impressed.
Sounds like Fawlty Towers
MadameKali · 27/09/2021 18:54

👏👏👏

EmbarrassingAdmissions · 27/09/2021 18:50

We won't follow along blindly because we understand and it makes us appear 'not nice'.

Even so, is anybody else winded by the speed of the change from, "It's just pronouns" to India W declaring a cervix that IW is willing to show on TV as well as claiming status as a woman in such a way that, in line with other changes, basically everyone but a woman can claim to be a woman.

Suitcaseseverywhere · 27/09/2021 18:48

I’m not going to do it. I’ll refuse. Because it’s NOT NECESSARY. no one who is emailing me directly needs to know my pronouns. They won’t call me she or her when they are emailing me.

And if we are in a room and someone is presenting in a way that they feel the need to indicate their pronouns that’s up to them. I’ll call them he or she or they or him or her or whatever they want. But they don’t get to tell me I have to indicate my pronouns. I’m a woman and that’s how I present.
And if someone called me he I’ve a mouth on me I can correct them

Why does it have to be this way?

Original poster
RhubarbCrumbled · 27/09/2021 18:44

@Suitcaseseverywhere

I work for one of the most woke orgs on the face of the planet. More and more people are putting their pronouns and I’m just waiting to be told to add it to the email sig. I really don’t want to. It’s a pile of utter WANK. I will call people whatever they want to be called, but why do I have to indicate my FUCKING pronouns? I have a typically female Irish name. And anyone who is emailing me won’t be using my pronouns anyway and if they get my pronouns wrong when I’m not there I don’t give a FUCK.

And breathe. I know this is coming - and soon- and I’m surprised just how angry I feel about it.

Because most people just follow along blindly because it's the 'nice thing to do' and don't understand everything that goes along with this apparently innocent bit of support.

We won't follow along blindly because we understand and it makes us appear 'not nice'.

OP posts:
Suitcaseseverywhere · 27/09/2021 17:30

I work for one of the most woke orgs on the face of the planet. More and more people are putting their pronouns and I’m just waiting to be told to add it to the email sig. I really don’t want to. It’s a pile of utter WANK. I will call people whatever they want to be called, but why do I have to indicate my FUCKING pronouns? I have a typically female Irish name. And anyone who is emailing me won’t be using my pronouns anyway and if they get my pronouns wrong when I’m not there I don’t give a FUCK.

And breathe. I know this is coming - and soon- and I’m surprised just how angry I feel about it.

SunshineCake1 · 27/09/2021 17:26

@Suitcaseseverywhere

I wish I was as brave. Currently ignoring the edict but expect to be pulled up on it soon
Channel RhubardCrumbled and we have all got your back.
Skysblue · 27/09/2021 17:18

Well done OP 👏

This ‘preferred pronouns’ nonsense is basically forcing employees to publicly state on their professional profile that they agree with Stonewall on everything and will do whatever they’re told by them, no matter how nonsensicle. Or face workplace bullying.

Well done for calling this out.

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