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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I think I’m going mad….

358 replies

Iootraw1 · 07/08/2021 21:48

I’ve absolutely had enough of my family bringing up ‘mum’s views’ (which I’ve learnt to keep completely private from them due to previously accusations of bigotry’), and then when I say a single thing in response,, accusing me of being ‘obsessed’ with it and not keeping it to myself!

I feel like I’m going mad. Husband saying he doesn’t know why I’m so obsessed with trans matters and I should keep to myself - I do! I don’t want to share with them because they don’t agree and don’t want to hear it.
Ever since the first time I tried to bring up and got shot down my him and kids I decided I would never mention again and wait for them one day to find out for themselves and be peaked.

But Just once again tonight in response to their accusations (they brought up subject not me) I tried to explain briefly why it opposes women’s rights and homosexual rights and got quickly turned upon. I’ve bought Trans by Helen Joyce now and will just tell them to read it next time (although will no doubt get condemned for buying a ‘transphobic’ book and they will refuse to read it) I feel really down, I can’t even have my own personal opinions and thoughts now without my very own family trying to eek out of me what ‘I really think’ and nose at what I’m looking at over my shoulder (I follow Glinner and Posie and Mars). I’ve bought headphones so they don’t hear it and never share any of it. I have to clear my history in case they search it.

It’s like some weird dystopia we’ve all been forced to enter. I even mentioned the olympics tonight in my defence and they still they said that I imagine all of this and it’s not really happening.

What will it take for they and the general public to wake up and at least listen to women’s concerns? I feel so upset tonight. 😩

OP posts:
R0wantrees · 08/08/2021 11:07

It’s like some weird dystopia we’ve all been forced to enter. I even mentioned the olympics tonight in my defence and they still they said that I imagine all of this and it’s not really happening.

What will it take for they and the general public to wake up and at least listen to women’s concerns? I feel so upset tonight

OP asks an important question on a feminism board on a parenting site about when will women's concerns be at least listened to by the general public.

There are some helpful illustrations on the thread of some of the dynamics used by some to try to prevent women's concerns being heard.

Those who lob the word 'bigot' around injudiciously on threads such as this on a feminism board on a parenting website would do well to consider its meaning:

bigot
/ˈbɪɡət/
noun
a person who is obstinately or unreasonably attached to a belief, opinion, or faction, especially one who is prejudiced against or antagonistic towards a person or people on the basis of their membership of a particular group.

Jorrris · 08/08/2021 11:07
Grin
TinselAngel · 08/08/2021 11:05

Me and Hitler both like Labradors but it doesn't make me a Nazi.

FloralBunting · 08/08/2021 11:04

@Jorrris

Bless.
😆
Jorrris · 08/08/2021 11:04

Bless.

BluebirdsSong · 08/08/2021 11:03

This reply has been deleted

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Jorrris · 08/08/2021 11:02

@FloralBunting

Blimey, Godwin already? It's not even 11am.
Bearing in mind he's been on here most of the night I doubt he's even been to bed yet. Easier to get to Godwin at the end of a very long mansplaining session.
FloralBunting · 08/08/2021 11:02

Tbh, I should get up. A sunday lie in has been nice, but probably like the OP, I've got a family to care for and limited time to argue with dim misogynists and homophobes.
I wish you all the best, and OP, you've had some helpful advice about personal boundaries.❤

MrsOvertonsWindow · 08/08/2021 10:59

I'll make coffee Floral. We're going to need it if we're looking for reasons to remove safeguarding from women and children (again)

FloralBunting · 08/08/2021 10:57

Blimey, Godwin already? It's not even 11am.

AtalantaRun · 08/08/2021 10:56

Sorry you're getting this from your family OP. Must be absolutely shit.

BluebirdsSong · 08/08/2021 10:55

@Helleofabore
"And yet it is considered ‘transphobic’ to discuss, or even acknowledge, the negative impacts of that group’s rights on women’s and children’s rights."

Literally every form of bigotry has been justified as "protecting women and children". This was done to defend segregation and promote homophobia as well. Nazi slogans literally speak of "securing a future for white children".

So yes, bigotry in the name of "protecting women and children" is still bigotry, and still unacceptable.

Helleofabore · 08/08/2021 10:52

Cross with Errol.

BluebirdsSong · 08/08/2021 10:51

@FloralBunting

Are you the poster defending homophobia on another thread? Always good to see which prejudices are being weaponized and how. You're doing a sterling job on FWR this morning.
Where have I defended homophobia?
Helleofabore · 08/08/2021 10:51

Racism is bigotry against minorities, and transphobia is bigotry against minorities. Transphobia is socially shunned for the same reasons racism was.

And yet it is considered ‘transphobic’ to discuss, or even acknowledge, the negative impacts of that group’s rights on women’s and children’s rights.

And the misogyny of this is rarely acknowledged.

FloralBunting · 08/08/2021 10:50

Are you the poster defending homophobia on another thread? Always good to see which prejudices are being weaponized and how. You're doing a sterling job on FWR this morning.

ErrolTheDragon · 08/08/2021 10:49

Misogyny - and in many countries racism - is bigotry and discrimination against majorities.

BluebirdsSong · 08/08/2021 10:48

When people compare anti-trans discrimination to other forms of discrimination, it's always just an attempt to illustrate why discrimination is wrong.

But instead, you always just double down.

BluebirdsSong · 08/08/2021 10:47

The argument against anti-trans prejudice and discrimination does stand on its own merits, the problem is that you don't consider discrimination to be wrong when it's against trans people.

Jorrris · 08/08/2021 10:44

@FloralBunting

Sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of you proving my point.
😂
Jorrris · 08/08/2021 10:44

Good post R0wantrees.

FloralBunting · 08/08/2021 10:44

Sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of you proving my point.

BluebirdsSong · 08/08/2021 10:42

@FloralBunting

Always the segue into another issue like racism. Because deep down, they know their argument doesn't stand on it's own merits.
Racism is bigotry against minorities, and transphobia is bigotry against minorities. Transphobia is socially shunned for the same reasons racism was.
Jorrris · 08/08/2021 10:42

And I mean, what's the difference? You want to encourage discussion of "controversial" subjects even if they are harmful, right?

Yes of course people should be free to discuss whatever they want.

R0wantrees · 08/08/2021 10:40

Apologies for cross-posting.

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