Milli Hill: I will not be silenced

When I followed Milli on Instagram the comments were turned on and although mostly supportive, she did have a few people saying that they were disappointed in her for not using inclusive language and that nobody is taking away the word women. She's turned the comments off now.

Right underneath her post, was this, on one of the GC feminist accounts I also follow.

We're not women according to this person. We're Bio-Holes. I really wish I could have shared this with the people telling Milli we're not losing our sex-based language to the TRA mob.

This is shocking, of course only women give birth. What could be more obvious? I've never heard of Milli but good on her for speaking out, it's a very well written piece. Off to buy a book to support her.

maybe I'm being stupid, but surely obstetric violence affecting the fragile sex (female) applies to all 'birthing people' anyway since all those who give birth are female. Their sex is female even if their gender is not. so why is it offensive?

totally support Milli, just can't get my head around why this is offensive. I mean I know we are supposed to pretend that men can give birth too but that's not true so...?

This has been picked up by the Mail on line and the comments are all totally supportive of Mili.

Good wishes Milli, I 'm going to get your books now, and you are clearly a compassionate and thoughtful person, subject to horrible bullying by vicious trans activists, but also by the compliant professional bodies and organisations that cave in through fear and cowardice.

Just read it. Simply appalling. What a world we live in.

Another woman being put through hell and having her livelihood attacked relentlessly because she failed to genuflect on command.

How many other women are there out there who have been subjected to the same horrific treatment, without society being made aware of the process?

Those social media posts she quoted were so spiteful and wicked. They egg each other on and tell lies to make her out to be a monster so that they can pretend to be brave warriors attacking her. Like the cowardly throng attacking that woman in the pink shirt at the Wi spa protest. Their behaviour is despicable, and they ought to be deeply ashamed of themselves.

I'm pretty appalled at Birthrights. Since Amy Gibbs started they've veered towards a swivelly-eyed approach to gender unfortunately.

It is horrifying that a charity ostensibly set up to campaign for human rights in childbirth is unable to recognise that obstetric violence is violence against women.

I'm going to sit on this for a few days and then write to birthrights to tell them how upset I am.

PaterPower, Milli herself is promoting the kindle books at 99p so I assume that she is keen that we buy them even at the reduced price… the promotion comes from the publisher rather than Amazon I believe.

I agree PRabbit. I am still waiting for inseminating parent to become as ubiquitous as birthing parent.

I don’t know…
“The Inseminator” has a certain ring to it 😎

Looking forward to seeing how men react when they are renamed the “inseminating person”.

I’ve bought a copy of each of her books in paperback (no use to me, but my daughters might eventually use them) and reserved the one on periods.

Do the authors get much of the proceeds when Amazon are doing 99p offers?

Birthing people’ seemed ok – but I did wonder how the phrase had been chosen, and who had agreed that this was the best pair of words for those who were pregnant but did not wish to be referred to as women. I asked this question in a group for student midwives, but was quickly informed that questions like this were not acceptable, and I was requested to no longer post in that group.

I found this is chilling. Orwellian. People, especially women, are expected to obey arcane new rules without question. No explanations will be given, and any attempt to discuss the new rules or ask for clarification is treated as a transgression.

Not sure if anyone has already said this but Give Birth like a Feminist and the Positive Birth Book are both 99p on Kindle at the moment. I have bought both and will probably buy both in paperback too. I have been listening to Milli read the audiobook of Give Birth Like a Feminist and it is excellent. I am looking forward to My Period in August.

I've just pre-ordered her book on periods for girls. It sounds great. My daughter and I have been looking into working with our monthly cycle so this sounds good.

Re: access to a uterus

www.cbc-network.org/2021/02/men-now-want-access-to-uterine-transplants/

thefederalist.com/2015/02/03/lbgt-demands-for-other-peoples-children-are-misogynistic/
[not sure what the author means by 'a child's right to have a mother and a father', but worth reading anyway]

This takes the biscuit for a misleading headline, but there again it's the Daily Heil so what did you expect?:

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6943105/Gay-transgender-man-tells-story-giving-birth-boy-despite-fears-trans-phobia.html

This is from all the way back in 2008:

abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/OnCall/story?id=4439567&page=1

and contained the following gem:

'For David, who flirted with becoming a parent, but eventually decided against it, gay men are the ultimate parents. "Gay men go through so many hoops to have kids," said David. "They really want them, unlike mothers like Britney Spears who don't care about their kids."'

Jesus. I grew up with my mum's second-wave feminist books on childbirth and we've gone backwards even from then! (1980s) in centring women in birth!

Solidarity for Milli. My DD is 8 so she will be needing to think about periods in the next few years, so I've just pre-ordered her period book. Keep going! This is all absolutely necessary and essential!

Link to RCM document:

www.rcm.org.uk/news-views/rcm-opinion/2021/the-rcm-response-to-the-nice-induction-of-labour-draft-guideline/

I'm glad she's said this.

@AnotherEmma
There was a recent thread about someone on Instagram talking about birthing people etc and pile ons on anyone questioning the language, whilst critiquing latest guidelines from NICE.

It is worth noting that NICE use the word WOMAN, consistently throughout.

www.nice.org.uk/news/article/nice-recommends-inducing-women-in-labour-earlier-in-new-draft-guidance

Furthermore the Royal College of Midwives response to the guidelines also exclusively (unless I missed it!) uses the word WOMAN.

If it's good enough for the professionals guiding practice it's good enough for everyone else. Refer dissenters to the professionals.

Lots of good comments on the Times, also lots of deletions and now they have closed comments.

I was so pleased to read this piece by Milli Hill.
I mean, not pleased that she was treated the way she was but great to see her speaking out and speaking up for women.

I had a baby last year and the woke language was very noticeable, I was so upset and angry about the erasure of women and the words we use to describe our lived biological experience in the name of so-called "inclusion". The local birth support groups and doulas were/are all about embracing "pregnant people", "birthing people", "chestfeeding". I hated it.

I have come across this group

with-woman.org/

On their Twitter account they declare their support for Milli Hill.

They may well be what I have been searching for - an explicitly and unashamedly woman centred group for mothers, midwives, doulas and breastfeeding counsellors.

One positive about this is the almost universal horror that readers have expressed under the Times article. Including hundreds of men - who of course will be fathers.

This will only be won with the active involvement of good and decent men as well as all the efforts of women.

This is so sad to see! And the disproportionate response to her comments is frankly scary.
Milli’s work is brilliant, particularly Give birth like a feminist.

I was so grateful to discover Milli and her voice after a horrible birth experience. I felt violated and over time grew more and more baffled at the way most women are routinely treated during pregnancy, labour and birth, especially in a society where we are placing more emphasis on women’s consent and autonomy in other situations. What was even more baffling was the lack of discussion from feminists on childbirth issues like consent and obstetric violence. So finding Milli and her work was a ‘yes! Finally someone gets it too and seems to really care’ moment.

To see her vilified by certain people like this is so upsetting and disappointing, her comments are so mild compared to the reactions! Then you look at all the fighting and people turning against each other meanwhile women right this very second are being failed by maternity services, being traumatised and violated as they give birth. It just sets everything back :(