School raising money for Stonewall

GiraffesMum · 2021-06-10T17:49:52+00:00

I’m now going to have to become that parent. After a balanced/sensible approach to LBTQ+ issues at school and PSHE I’m now faced with school wanting to fundraise for stonewall during pride month. My daughter (who educates her peers in the difference between sex and gender - proud Mum alert) is willing to go and talk to her head of year about it and suggest that this is not an appropriate charity. Please can anyone give me ideas for suitable alternatives for a charity they could support and published reasons (eg newspaper articles) which explain simply why this is not a charity they want to align themselves too. She is looking to develop a coherent argument and because of family circumstances I don’t have time to trawl through all the posts on here. Thank you for your help.

Original poster

GiraffesMum · 12/06/2021 10:54

Thank you for all your help. My daughter spoke to some of her friends in the LBQT+ group at school and the students chose and voted on the charity. They didn’t know who else to vote for. I think it was “ok’d” by the teachers through ignorance rather than anything else.

As she is not sure if one student voice will be effective against a group vote, we have decided that I am going to write a “gentle” email to the head and suggest that it might not be wise to support Stonewall in the current climate (putting in links you’ve provided - thanks again) and ask if they have considered supporting a local LBGT+ charity that receives no central funding. I don’t know the charity at all, but I’ve just read their website and the first line of the training summary it offers says that their objective is to ensure that you “ Understand the difference between sexual orientation and gender identity” so I”m prepared to take the risk. It also makes it an easier “sell” to the students - lets support someone local with no central funding rather than a big faceless organisation.

OP posts:

NellWilsonsWhiteHair · 11/06/2021 18:39

Yeah, I'm glad the LGB Alliance exists but I think it would be just as inflammatory a choice as Stonewall.

AKT and THT both good suggestions IMO. There may also be a local option which can feel a bit more meaningful sometimes (London Friend is good, for example, but not very relevant if you're not in London!).

Freespeecher · 11/06/2021 17:47

I think the charity should be 'meaningful' for want of a better word - maybe I mean it offers practical, tangible benefits as opposed to a campaigning organisation.

In my old office, the charity for Black History Month was 'Show Racism the Red Card' for a few years until someone suggested we instead donate to a local charity supporting sickle cell patients (which I personally preferred).

As Mind Out seems to have CRT links then maybe the Terrence Higgins Trust as opposed to Stonewall / LGB Alliance (which is not a value judgement beyond the fact that they're campaigners / lobby groups).

Unless someone knows something negative about the THT in which case I await the next suggestion:)

zanahoria · 11/06/2021 17:13

I love LGB Alliance to death and they have every right to be a charity but I would not recommend them here, they may not be for everyone and coukd get to be a bunfight.

Are there any LGBT charities that just do charitable works and not lobbying and training?

FindTheTruth · 11/06/2021 16:31

OP, if your school wants to support lesbian, gay and bisexual rights, it's worth considering the homophobia faced supporters of 'gender theory'. Stonewall and PP have a right to their beliefs but they do NOT have a right to bully LGB people or call them transphobic simply for being what they are, namely same-sex attracted.

MishyJDI · 11/06/2021 16:00

@ItsAllGoingToBeFine

Essex judgement - Stonewall advising law as Stonewall wishes it, not as it is.

Stonewall website - campaign for removal of single sex spaces, campaign to change sex by deception laws, redefining gay/lesbian as attraction to gender not sex.

LGBAlliance should be an a appropriate replacement? I'm sure they have been cited in reputable newspapers?

Trouble is LGB alliance just are a single issue party against Trans. They actually do nothing positive for LGB people other than to dump on trans!

FindTheTruth · 11/06/2021 15:21

@GiraffesMum this summary of Maya's case is the best I've seen and points out that "A significant portion of lesbian, gay or bisexual people are very clear that they are same-sex (and not same-gender) attracted". Stonewall are in the 'same-gender attracted' camp.
www.linkedin.com/pulse/forstater-judgment-what-next-peter-daly/

ChristinaXYZ · 11/06/2021 09:31

@EmbarrassingAdmissions

On another thread, a MNer recommends:

Mind Out is the charity you are looking for. It is a wonderful organisation that works so hard to improve the mental health of all LGBT+ people. It also steers well clear of the toxic lobbying type work that Stonewall does:

mindout.org.uk

Mind Out seem to be pushing critical race theory. You may support that or not but as is shown with Alison Phipps other issues can follow in the wake of that, that the average feminist may well not like! The phrase "white privilege" appears high up on the home page and having just read that Oxfam guff I really don't like it.

The Albert Kennedy Trust really seems a really good idea. they seem to stick to the matter in hand - an important one too.

BunnyBerries · 11/06/2021 08:49

A big videogame publisher is fundraising for MindOut this month so I suspect that would be popular with school pupils!

Looneytune253 · 11/06/2021 08:23

Might be something as simple as using a blue pen on their contract 😉

overnightangel · 11/06/2021 08:04

@Looneytune253

She said they have been transphobic to their trans staff. To be fair (knowing my daughter very very well) it's not hard to be transphobic in those circles but I will ask her for more details when she gets up

Can just imagine the sort of people, constantly having ears fully pricked up to find something to be offended by 😂

EmpressWitchDoesntBurn · 11/06/2021 08:00

@Looneytune253

She said they have been transphobic to their trans staff. To be fair (knowing my daughter very very well) it's not hard to be transphobic in those circles but I will ask her for more details when she gets up

Thank you - very intrigued!

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep · 11/06/2021 07:49

@Looneytune253

She said they have been transphobic to their trans staff. To be fair (knowing my daughter very very well) it's not hard to be transphobic in those circles but I will ask her for more details when she gets up

Good lord It will never be enough for some people!

Looneytune253 · 11/06/2021 07:28

She said they have been transphobic to their trans staff. To be fair (knowing my daughter very very well) it's not hard to be transphobic in those circles but I will ask her for more details when she gets up

EmpressWitchDoesntBurn · 10/06/2021 22:40

@Looneytune253

To be fair my very woke daughter was just saying today that stonewall is now seen as transphobic so the organisation won't be liked by either side

That’s hilarious. Can you ask her for more details?

Leafstamp · 10/06/2021 22:14

@Looneytune253

To be fair my very woke daughter was just saying today that stonewall is now seen as transphobic so the organisation won't be liked by either side

FPFW pointing out that Stonewall do not serve trans people well:

mobile.twitter.com/fairplaywomen/status/1403060152111149056

TedImgoingmad · 10/06/2021 22:00

They are a political lobby group. Ask the school what other political lobby groups the school will be supporting.throughout the year. What women's group did they raise money for on International Women's Day? Did they raise money for, e.g., Southhall Black Sisters during Black History Month?

bitheby · 10/06/2021 21:56

@Looneytune253

To be fair my very woke daughter was just saying today that stonewall is now seen as transphobic so the organisation won't be liked by either side

They'll be gutted they just spent all that money on a pink and blue rebrand.

Zeev · 10/06/2021 21:47

@Looneytune253

To be fair my very woke daughter was just saying today that stonewall is now seen as transphobic so the organisation won't be liked by either side

How did that happen?

OhHolyJesus · 10/06/2021 21:44

For your DD OP. All power to her for doing this.

Govt guidelines

Updated relationships, sex and health curriculum guidance www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/4032584-Updated-relationships-sex-and-health-curriculum-guidance

BBC article on how schools are normalising sexual harassment

www.bbc.com/news/education-57411363

Nancy Kelly

www.bbc.com/news/uk-57281448

Stonewall defends its direction to BBC www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/4257181-stonewall-defends-its-direction-to-bbc

Link to Maya's stuff if useful - due to their stonewall challenge and the judgement today

hiyamaya.net/employment-appeal/

sex-matters.org/

LGB Alliance - their explanation on why they are not a hate group is really good I think

lgballiance.org.uk/myths/

Original poster

GiraffesMum · 10/06/2021 20:30

Thank you all so much for this - you’re all amazing. Mind Out is a fantastic idea as they’re also pushing mental health. I’ve given my daughter a link to this thread and she’s sorting out her argument.

OP posts:

ChickenonaMug · 10/06/2021 20:24

The letter template available here from Safe Schools Alliance UK summarises the concerns and could probably be adapted by you/your daughter for her school.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/safeschoolsallianceuk.net/2021/02/14/is-your-childrens-school-a-stonewall-champion/amp/

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep · 10/06/2021 20:02

@Looneytune253

To be fair my very woke daughter was just saying today that stonewall is now seen as transphobic so the organisation won't be liked by either side

Eh?

EmbarrassingAdmissions · 10/06/2021 20:01

On another thread, a MNer recommends:

Mind Out is the charity you are looking for. It is a wonderful organisation that works so hard to improve the mental health of all LGBT+ people. It also steers well clear of the toxic lobbying type work that Stonewall does:

mindout.org.uk

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 10/06/2021 20:01

Essex judgement - Stonewall advising law as Stonewall wishes it, not as it is.

Stonewall website - campaign for removal of single sex spaces, campaign to change sex by deception laws, redefining gay/lesbian as attraction to gender not sex.

LGBAlliance should be an a appropriate replacement? I'm sure they have been cited in reputable newspapers?