Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Best responses for being asked for pronouns in person

312 replies

Seraphinite · 05/06/2021 23:33

I’m going to a residential training course (not UK) and I suspect they will ask us for pronouns when we introduce ourselves on day one. (I’ve been to something with this organization before and have seen it)

What are some good responses I can give? Is saying ‘I prefer not to say’ best?

I don’t want to draw attention to it, be adversarial or open up discussion, I just don’t want to answer.

(For avoidance of doubt, I don’t buy in to gender ideology so that’s why I don’t want to answer. To me, stating my pronouns indicates I think it’s an ok question to ask in the first place )

OP posts:
BaronessBomburst · 05/06/2021 23:46

I once read a brilliant answer on here
It was along the lines of '"I'm gender-free but please use the pronouns you feel most comfortable using for me. My sex is biologically female so if you want to use she and her, that's fine."

UhtredRagnarson · 05/06/2021 23:46

You could always answer with “it’s extremely transphobic to insist on someone identifying their pronouns.”

BahHumbygge · 05/06/2021 23:46

“My pronouns? I or me. Oh, if you’re referring to me? In that case it’s totally at you discretion”

“No thanks, I don’t have any preference.”

“I’m female” (with an undertone of “I think you need to go to specsavers”)

NiceGerbil · 05/06/2021 23:46

I would give a very bland look and say they them.

But I mean who the fuck is supposed to be able to remember all this with a bunch of strangers. I have enough trouble with names and faces tbh.

UhtredRagnarson · 05/06/2021 23:45

I think regardless of what I said my face would give away my true reaction to that question. Grin

Original poster
Seraphinite · 05/06/2021 23:44

Thanks. Last time I ignored it and wasn’t pressed however others who ignored it or forgot were asked, which is why I want my reply ready.
These are helpful.

OP posts:
olidora63 · 05/06/2021 23:44

Just say what your name is 🙄

purplewolfie · 05/06/2021 23:44

I say "I don't mind"

JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff · 05/06/2021 23:43

I would just say, "I don't feel comfortable saying" and look a bit pained. If they push, remind them that not everyone is out at work.

teezletangler · 05/06/2021 23:41

I'd probably just entirely ignore the preferred pronouns part and if pressed say something like, You can call me whatever you want or I don't have any preferred pronouns. I'd like to be more forthright/controversial but in that setting I wouldn't be.

Original poster
Seraphinite · 05/06/2021 23:40

Hahaha, love it! I’ll keep that in mind just in case 😆

Thanks

OP posts:
WiltingAtTreadmills · 05/06/2021 23:37

"Is this about my genitals?"

But really, just ignore it, and if pressed "I prefer not to say" is probably your best bet.

Swipe left for the next trending thread