Why give child man' s surname

My son has my surname. Not married, and even before I met my partner (many years ago) I swore my child would have my name and I would never change my name on marriage.

My name is unusual, pretty and has an interesting history.

I can see the benefits of picking the ‘nicer’ surname, and the whole family using that.

Personally, there’s no way I would agree to having a different surname to my kids, so they have mine.

I have children by diffeent dads, they have their dads surnames. Never complicated for me.

Boys were going to have his name, girls mine. We had two boys. If I'd known in advance I might have tried to find a different compromise.

Both have middle names that have links to my family.

@LadyChappers

My children have my surname. It was never something heavily debated - I grew them, I named them.

Yep, nine months inside me tipped the balance.

Not only is it easier for the wife to change her name than for the husband as a PP said, admin at schools, airports and loads of other places is just easier when parents and child share a name.

I took my husband's name because it was the easiest option administratively. My old name was only mine because it was my dad's so there's no special significance to it, whereas taking my husband's name reflects an active choice I made in marrying him rather than just passively growing up with my dad's name. I am no less a part of my parents' family because I don't share their name.

My DDs were born before DH and I married, I knew we were getting married at some point and so decided we’d all have the same name, which happened to be his name. I feel I am getting more and more militantly feminist as I get older but, I have to confess, this isn’t something that bothered me before and it doesn’t bother me now. My name, his name? They’re all some other mans name. ‘My’ name isn’t mine, it’s my father’s. And, actually, it wasn’t even the name of the lovely man who I knew as Grandad and my DF knew as Dad, who chose him and my Nan as his ready made family when my DFs father left them when my DF was two years old. It was the name of the idiot who left them destitute. And my Mother’s ‘maiden’ name? Well, firstly she was abusive all throughout my childhood, and so was my Grandfather whose name she had. So, on balance, if I’m going to have any name, I’d rather have the name of my lovely husband than any of the abusive twats of men (and woman) that are in my family history. I suppose the only alternative would have been to make up a completely new name, but I didn’t think of that then

DD came along before we married. After much discussion we agreed she should have the same surname as her (half) siblings to make them feel more of a family. I think it was the right choice. It did pain me though.
I'm still sitting on the fence about my name. For some things I use my name, for simplicity I use my husband's surname on some others. I only use my name at work.

I'm astonished at how many PPs have such awful surnames that they couldn't burden their children with them! My surname is not only boring but my parents changed it before I was born, so it's not a "family name". My DD's father has a lovely, distinguished Indian name. However, we weren't married so she has my name and, as we are no longer together 23 years later and he hasn't had contact with her for many years (his choice), I think it was the right decision.

I have my father’s surname
DH has his mother’s

We both kept our surnames on marriage
DC1 had family middle name from my side and his surname (she died as an infant as we knew was likely)
DC2 ditto
DC3 has my surname (and same middle name as DC1)

So my two living children have different aurnamwa

My husband’s sister also has her mother’s surname which she kept on marriage and gave to her son.

My children have my surname. Their father’s was not as good as mine.

Completely agree. I don't get it either. Naming your child with your male partner's surname is giving in to centuries of women being dominated by men.
To be fair though, almost any woman's own pre-marriage surname (and yes, I changed mine) is a symbol of hundreds of years of female ancestors being the chattel of their husbands. For centuries, they have lost their own surname and taken a new one; that's how I ended up with the one I had.

My situation is exactly the same as Hens' above. And I thought I would feel very strongly about DCs not having my name. As soon as I gave birth though I knew nothing could take that connection away from me and that was enough, I didn't mind.

Can't see myself ever changing my name now, but sometimes wonder if it would be easier to all be the same.

I gave my children their fathers surname. Mine is awful and I'd change it if I didn't want to upset my dad. Its also distinctive. I have a job in which I'm not always viewed favourably. I've had to change all my social media accounts. My boys surnames are common and will blend in nicely.

I didn't change my name when we got married, but our kids have got DH's surname. I can't remember the exact reason, I think it was something a bit stupid along the lines of they were more obviously mine given I carried them and gave birth to them and I felt DH was a bit left out of the whole process? Didn't think it through that well I'm embarrassed to say! And I probably wouldn't have done the same now, but not sure what I would have done, would it really be better if they had my name? After all, it was, and still is, a joint project .

I have a legitimately horrid name. If you Google it, you find it was one of the insulting surnames imposed on Ashkenazi Jews by the Hapsburgs. But my brother's kids are growing up with it, just like I did. I made it my middle name when I married.

I think many men would change last names if society didn't see it as emasculating.

It's odd how many women have terrible names they can't wait to change yet their fathers and brothers never do