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Original poster

Jolene, and other anti-feminist anthems

817 replies

StealthPolarBear · 20/03/2021 20:14

Just to say this is a light-hearted chat thread.
I love jolene, sing it with a minor adaptation every time I'm cleaning the windows. I have no idea about the background, but it must come near the top of the least feminist songs ever!
Another which I've just heard is sheryl crow, strong enough. "lie to me, I promise I'll believe, lie to me, but please don't leave"
Brilliant song, awful lyrics :)
Any others?

OP posts:
Catabogus · 20/03/2021 22:30

@StealthPolarBear

I love jolene. And you don't have to say you love me is also fantastic and a perfect example of what I mean. Just be close at hand.
Wait, “You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me” by Transvision Vamp?! I always thought this was a feminist anthem! (women can go and have one-night stands/no strings sex too, kind of thing)...?
FrankButchersDickieBow · 20/03/2021 22:30

Nrtft but 'cater to you' by destiny's child 🤮🤮🤮🤮

PoleToPole · 20/03/2021 22:29

I love Jolene, but I definitely wouldn`t say its a feminist song - the woman deserves better than a man who talks about another woman in his sleep Hmm and deserves some more self respect.

I like country music, but some of the songs are hideous. The three most common themes seem to be:

  1. Men singing about underage (usually high school) "temptresses" Hmm of one variety or another. Revolting.
  2. Men singing about good "country girls" who know how to behave (teeth gnashing in itself) and you can take home to meet your parents Hmm
  3. Women fawning over and pandering to "their man`s" whims while he does whatever he wants and treats her like crap Hmm.
HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 20/03/2021 22:28

Put a ring on it,Definitely an anthem to not patiently meekly waiting on a man
Plenty more fish and all that

SheikahSlate · 20/03/2021 22:27

@Ousted

Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton. The woman literally does everything through the evening and also has to look amazing. That song always makes me think WTF.
Clapton says that he and Pattie Boyd were getting ready for a party, and while he was ready to go, she was taking ages and they were running really late. She asked him, 'how do I look', and he said, somewhat impatiently, 'yes, you look wonderful tonight'. Then he turned it into a song. That's what he says, anyway!
RickiTarr · 20/03/2021 22:27

@scaredsadandstuck

I always interpreted put a ring on it as a bit more metaphorical... meaning you can't have your cake and eat it kind of thing. That it was about a man who thought he didn't have to committ but that 'his' woman would still wait patiently for him. But turns out she didn't....? Or am I being optimistic?
Fine, but why is she calling herself “it”?
scaredsadandstuck · 20/03/2021 22:26

I always interpreted put a ring on it as a bit more metaphorical... meaning you can't have your cake and eat it kind of thing. That it was about a man who thought he didn't have to committ but that 'his' woman would still wait patiently for him. But turns out she didn't....? Or am I being optimistic?

RickiTarr · 20/03/2021 22:25

@NotImpossible

Patience (Take That?)

I'm not over my ex but if you could just hang around for a bit I might give you some attention. Maybe. In a while.

“First cut is the deepest” (Cat Stevens or Rod Stewart) is basically the same idea.

I know this is a light hearted thread but an awful lot of patriarchal conditioning seems to have been transmitted through pop music, doesn’t it? We’re still stuck at the stage of unmasking dodgy performers and TOTP presenters. Maybe the bigger story is the propaganda the music industry has put out?

I’m going to put Carole King on to cheer myself up.

Deliriumoftheendless · 20/03/2021 22:23

Miss independent by NeYo is on my running playlist
When I read this I thought it was some cool
new name for Neil Young 🤦‍♀️

RickiTarr · 20/03/2021 22:22

@Spidder

OverviewLyricsListenOther recordingsPeople also search for Saying "I love you" Is not the words I want to hear from you It's not that I want you Not to say, but if you only knew How easy It would be to show me how you feel More than words Is all you have to do to make it real Then you wouldn't have to say That you love me 'Cause I'd already know What would you do If my heart was torn in two More than words to show you feel That your love for me is real What would you say If I took those words away Then you couldn't make things new Just by saying "I love you" La di da, da di da, di dai dai da More than words La di da, da di da Now that I've tried to Talk to you and make you understand All you have to do is close your eyes And just reach out your hands And touch me Hold me close don't ever let me go More than words Is all I ever…
Even at 15 we all spotted those lyrics for the rapey, coercive crap that they were. I remember a bunch of us discussing it during a wet lunch in a classroom and that was at a time that a lot of dodgy shit was going on largely unremarked.

Still like the tune though. Blush

changingnames786 · 20/03/2021 22:22

Jolene is just about the best song EVER, it sits on my playlist along side Dolly's other classic "Just because I'm woman" to settle my feminist guilt a touch Grin

PuppyMonkey · 20/03/2021 22:22

I always feel bit angry when I hear Bruce Springsteen saying he had a wife and kids in Baltimore Jack and went out for a ride and never came back.

HerewardTheWoke · 20/03/2021 22:21

I love Jolene. There's a reading of it where Jolene is Death and the singer is imploring her not to take her partner ...

PowerslidePanda · 20/03/2021 22:21

Power by Little Mix - it's trying to be overtly feminist, but completely misses the mark. "You're the man but I got the power". But all that lyric does is re-enforces that a woman having "the power" is something exceptional - by default, we should expect the men to be the powerful ones! Hmm

And while we're on the subject of terrible Little Mix songs...

Love Me Like You. Woe is me - I'm desperately pining for you; not because I loved you but because I know that I will never again meet anyone who was as good in bed as you Hmm Presumably written by a man with a very large ego who assumes that this is how women actually think.

Secret Love Song. "I wish that it could be like that, why can't we be like that?" Because you're in a relationship (as per the other lyrics)! You're not star-crossed lovers, you're a cheat!

It drives me mad that they're role models for young girls...

NotImpossible · 20/03/2021 22:21

Patience (Take That?)

I'm not over my ex but if you could just hang around for a bit I might give you some attention. Maybe. In a while.

StormzyinaTCup · 20/03/2021 22:20

Gosh that’s certainly a different interpretation Dodo. In my head I could absolutely imagine it being played at a medieval banquet to entertain dignitaries . I have heard covers before and they have been a bit ‘meh’ but that one is so different I’m giving it a 👍🏻😊

ktp100 · 20/03/2021 22:20

@MrsTerryPratchett

I love old school rap like NWA but it's awful.
LOVE NWA but I do cringe along these days!

The misogyny is HEAVY!!

Mumtotwofurbabies · 20/03/2021 22:20

Miss independent by NeYo is on my running playlist and gives me the rage for some reason. Not sure why as the lyrics are describing an independent women, i just think why do we need a song by a man to cheerlead that as if it’s something unusual, comes across as a bit patronising? 😂😂🤷‍♀️

Ooh there's somethin' about
Kind of woman that can do for herself
I look at her and it makes me proud
There's somethin' about her
There's somethin' oh so sexy about
Kind of woman that don't even need my help
She said she got it, she got it, no doubt
There's something about her
'Cause she walk like a boss
Talk like a boss
Manicured nails to set the pedicure off
She's fly effortlessly
And she move like a boss
Do what a boss do
She got me thinkin' about gettin' involved
That's the kind of girl I need, oh

VienneseWhirligig · 20/03/2021 22:19

Although 36D by The Beautiful South (I love them but their lyrics don't really scream feminism)

Ousted · 20/03/2021 22:18

Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton. The woman literally does everything through the evening and also has to look amazing. That song always makes me think WTF.

landofgiants · 20/03/2021 22:18

I find most love/romance type songs anti-feminist and with a few exceptions, I've never liked them. Can't get excited about 'Don't Marry Her' though - for me this was all about the swearing.

Sophoclesthefox · 20/03/2021 22:18

[quote Neversleepingever]Why why WHY Akon, when you 'tried to describe that girl without being disrespectful'... Did you settle on 'sexy bitch'

[/quote] This is the one that popped into my head when I red the thread title 🤣 i hate myself for liking it, bloody awful lyrics. See also One by Swedish House Mafia, wgich I really like while trying to ignore that it seems to be about sexually harassing women in clubs (is it?)
LoudNowSing · 20/03/2021 22:18

[quote Neversleepingever]Why why WHY Akon, when you 'tried to describe that girl without being disrespectful'... Did you settle on 'sexy bitch'

[/quote] She's nothing like your neighbourhood whore though, at least. Confused

I hate that stupid bastard of a song with a passion, but it's on one of my favourite running mixes, so I've listened to it more than anyone ever should. One of these days, I'm going to hunt Akon down.

Butteredtoast55 · 20/03/2021 22:17

I loathe 'Psycho' by Ava Max - if you change it to being about a man it would be all kinds of wrong.

Crockof · 20/03/2021 22:16

@VienneseWhirligig

Isn't the Housemartins one a sarcastic take on sexist wankers in the City? ("I think I might be happy if I wasn't out with them"?)
Yes agree