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Original poster

Daily acts of feminism - a thread for ideas

441 replies

teawamutu · 14/03/2021 10:14

Pinched the idea shamelessly from another thread after an hour of speechless rage reading the papers and Twatter. I need to DO something.

I pledge to do something positive every day to stand up for women. Deeds not words.

Today was taken care of for me - a subscription to The Radical Notion for Mother's Day. I'm also going to fill out the VAWG consultation.

Thought might be good to share anything else we come across here, so anyone in need of ideas could check?

OP posts:
Original poster
teawamutu · 16/03/2021 16:00

Just wrote to my MP to raise points about:

  1. Ensuring gender isn't included in the definition of misogyny per that twit Stella Creasy
  2. Ensuring SEX, not gender, is the basis for women's provision.
  3. Looking carefully at the conversion therapy ban to make sure therapeutic support for dysphoric children isn't outlawed.

Also found this rather good list of questions on Twitter which I will be emailing to all my local election candidates: mobile.twitter.com/WilfredsGang/status/1371851112865742850

OP posts:
Cowbells · 16/03/2021 14:09

@sashh

Can someone help me with how to approach a school about slut shaming around uniform. I don't need to spell it out I don't think...you know the 'your skirt is too short' type comments.

I had a student spend a day in isolation because her uniform was, "too sexual" a male teacher was so embarrassed he got a female teacher to say this to the student and issue the sanction.

The student had added over the knee socks to her uniform.

I'm supply and my contract was finishing so although I was furious the student didn't want me to take up her cause, I did however let the head know, "If a girl puts socks on and her uniform becomes 'too sexual' then there is something wrong with the uniform or there is something wrong with the teacher, there is nothing wrong with the child".

I may also have had quite a long conversation with the head where I pointed out the sexism in the school, he started by saying I was insulting him, I said it wasn't him it was the school eg that girls have curves and that means their trousers will be tighter than boys, if you look at a bunch of squaddies they are all in clothing that fits but the females trousers look tight over the bum.

And the posters around the school eg one for sport where the pics and 'encouraging words' for females were about watching sport and the ones from men were about taking part, this also included a quote from Lance Armstrong.

This was a frank discussion but I can also do the, I'm sure this is not intentional but and please don't be upset ...'

I sent that kind of email to the sports co ordinator at an FE college, he wrote a news letter every month, I gently pointed out that the language used about the men's team that they had 'battled through to the quarter finals and were looking to be in the final' but the 'girls' team' had been disappointed to not make it to the final. I pointed out they had both got to the same stage in the competition.

Oh and a poster put up advertising a boxing class for exercise, had photos of three men, even though the poster's small print said it had both men's and women's classes, I asked if he had considered a photo Nicola Adams, who at the time had just become and will always be the first Women gold medalist in boxing?

He actually sent a lovely reply saying he hadn't considered the points but could see them now.

This is brilliant. That is such good work. Did the Head see your point of view in the end? Did anyone change their behaviour as a result? I think we need follow ups too.
FeministRabbit · 16/03/2021 14:03

@awesomekillick

When meeting a man - any man you don't know, so shopkeeper, zoom call, delivery driver, old bloke outside Boots - try not to smile and "be nice". It's bloody hard. But I became aware of how much effort I put into smiling and being nice just in a "I'm a nice woman" way, so I'm trying hard not to do it because it's yet another aspect of the socialisation of women. I'm well into my 50s. It feels so hostile not to smile - but men manage to do it all the time!
I love this. I try so hard to do this but my 'be a nice girl' socialisation is so hard-wired.
tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz · 16/03/2021 14:02

Yes, use the code I posted upthread for free p and p.

thinking was it yourself who recommended the site last week? Thanks if it was Smile

thinkingaboutLangCleg · 16/03/2021 14:00

I found it by looking for radical tea towels, Bowed

tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz · 16/03/2021 13:59

OP the idea for templates is a great one. I'm not articulate at all and would find this very helpful.

Bowednotbroken · 16/03/2021 13:40

Which site is best for the suffragette face masks please? Lots coming up when I search but best to get the funds to the right place. Thank you.

gardenbird48 · 16/03/2021 13:27

@timeisnotaline

A small thing but I bought my husband a book by a female author. I thought he’d like it and then I thought he might not be keen on a female author and then I realised how ridiculous that is.
I did exactly that at Christmas, after having exactly the same thoughts. Then we realised that he'd bought it for himself anyway and enjoyed it Grin . I don't know why it even crossed my mind that he might not like it because of a female author but I have firmly put those thoughts out of my head forever.

He likes detective-y sort of books so I might get him one of JKs grown up books (can't remember the name atm)

timeisnotaline · 16/03/2021 13:21

A small thing but I bought my husband a book by a female author. I thought he’d like it and then I thought he might not be keen on a female author and then I realised how ridiculous that is.

MaudTheInvincible · 16/03/2021 13:14

I personally find baby animals way more appealing than the human version (I don't write this inside New Baby cards).

Grin
PandorasMailbox · 16/03/2021 13:11

@tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz

Following a recommendation from another MNer last week I got a new face mask in suffragette colours and a set of suffragette button badges from Radical Tea Towel.

The masks are designed and manufactured in the uk and £1 for every one sold is donated to food banks. The quality is lovely and they arrived next day.

I've a code for free delivery if anybody wants to use it -

FREERAD

Smile

Thanks for that. I'll put in an order ASAP Smile
Beowulfa · 16/03/2021 13:11

Re the lazy blue/pink It's A Boy/Girl! congratulations cards- this has been a pet hate of mine for years. I recommend looking in the neutral "no message inside" section for some of the ones with nice wildlife photography for an image of a cute baby animal (penguins and giraffes seem popular). The card is then reproduction-themed. I personally find baby animals way more appealing than the human version (I don't write this inside New Baby cards).

Beamur · 16/03/2021 13:07

Reading more. I've started Invisible Women. Have the next edition of the Radical Notion too.

Original poster
teawamutu · 16/03/2021 13:05

Could we develop some template notes for MPs and councillors as a starting point for once we're out of lockdown and have less time?

OP posts:
TheRabbitOfCaerbannog · 16/03/2021 12:57

Although that Suffragette mask is tempting

I caved. It's on its way Grin

FeministRabbit · 16/03/2021 12:53

Over the weekend I re-arranged my bookshelves in my home office so only the spines of books by women are visible. I sit in front of these shelves for online meetings.

Over the weekend I called out my hideous mother on her 'not all men', 'women are violent too' bullshit.

Today I did an online meeting wearing a jumper which says 'Radical Feminist' in pink capital letters.

thinkingaboutLangCleg · 16/03/2021 12:50

Sending emails, completing consultations and surveys, subscribing to free newsletters and sharing the information in them, spreading awareness are all feminist acts in themselves and all contribute to a better world for girls and women.

Absolutely. Lockdown is leaving a bit of extra money in my account, which I'd usually spend on going out, so I'm sending it to various crowdfunders instead. But all those other actions are essential. I'm also trying, not quite successfully to keep up with all the consultations.

Writing that has made me realise how much more pressure there will be on all this feminist work when we don't keep having lockdowns. Most of us will have less free time and less money. How are we going to keep this up?

Something to think about, because we have to keep going. Gynephobia is massively well-funded and well-staffed.

Original poster
teawamutu · 16/03/2021 12:40

Today I did a bit of digging for Raquel Rosario Sanchez.

On tomorrow's list are notes thanking Liz Truss and Kemi Badenoch for their measured and sensible approach.

OP posts:
334bu · 16/03/2021 12:30

Emailing MPs, councillors etc when appropriate doesn't cost anything other than time. I think I might take inspiration from the thread on Spaces For Girls and keep an eye on local public planning applications and check that they are taking women and children's safety into account.

Although that Suffragette mask is temptingSmile

TheRabbitOfCaerbannog · 16/03/2021 12:10

Well said Maud

fatblackcatspaw · 16/03/2021 12:00

@ForeverBubblegum

Well you lovely people have given me the push I needed to stop just reading and frowning, and actually do something, no matter how small.

I've ordered some ribbon and also a 50 pack of thank you cards, once there hear I'll have no excuse and can send one out every time I hear of politicians sticking up for women (instead of meaning to pick one up, then losing impetus).

I've also shared a pro woman post on Facebook, nothing to blatant (I'm not that brave (yet)), but might be notice amongst my carefully non political post history.

brilliant idea about the thank you cards
sashh · 16/03/2021 11:47

jewel1968
I have noticed that schools that police girls' skirts also put them in tiny skorts for PE.

One school I worked at had the usual uniform but girls also had the option of a blouse rather than a shirt, it had a sort of, roll over, on the bottom so it was designed to sit over the skirt.

The blouse also was designed to be worn with an open neck and a cravat instead of the school tie.

I think the problem with most school uniforms is that they have been designed for male students and then extended to girls so they don't fit properly.

Way back in my day we had a summer uniform that was a dress, there is no way to roll up a dress. You also cannot roll up culottes. But what do schools do? They have skirts. They have the boys uniform and add a skirt.

Beamur · 16/03/2021 10:50

sashh
Such good points. I think the language used is really important and something I hadn't seen so clearly until quite recently.
I raised a small issue with my DD's primary school a few years ago. It was around how the kids had been arranged for a photograph. Girls kneeling boys standing behind them. My DD came home incandescent with rage about it. I was on good terms with the Head but he was hugely defensive when I pointed out that this arrangement was inherently sexist. His reply was that it was a female teacher who had been responsible, hence it couldn't be sexist. Female teacher also replied to say that the children had arranged themselves like that, which wasn't true and if it was true, begs a question surely about why...
I wasn't impressed but didn't press any further.

MaudTheInvincible · 16/03/2021 10:50

I've become conscious from PP's comments that a lot of these suggestions (including my own) have involved spending money. I'd like to say that I really, really don't think it is necessary or even desirable to spend anything to make a difference to our society. Sending emails, completing consultations and surveys, subscribing to free newsletters and sharing the information in them, spreading awareness are all feminist acts in themselves and all contribute to a better world for girls and women.

Of course, contributing financially is fantastic, whether that is giving to fundraisers, buying tee shirts and badges, buying ribbons for railings or paint for decorating stones, or making deliberate choices about toys, clothes, tampons. But let's face it, we're not all in a position to do that, or not as much as we'd like, and no woman should feel that their feminism is of lower value because of that.

Feministing is a state of mind 💚🤍💜