Pronouns in email

she/her

I keep seeing she/they. I don't like to ask, but I wonder if they mean she/her and have chosen pronouns without actually understanding what pronouns are and how they work. Otherwise, I can say "When Sally speaks she does so very clearly", but do I also have to say "Tommy, please give Sally's book back to they". Even 'them' would make grammatical but not logical sense. I mean I could use 'them' and not 'they' but why 'she' (denoting female) and 'them' (denoting more than one person or non-binary or summat).

“It doesn’t even do what it’s purported to do! “
Exactly! Instead it just creates an atmosphere of it’s somehow so bad if you get it wrong. So why is it seen as supportive and kind 😖 Not kind to women.

I've read a number of threads about this, and thought about what I'll do when it happens in my workplace,and I've decided I'm just going to say, 'no thank you'. If HR ask why, I will say, 'because I don't want to'.

Other people will be in different situations but I think trying to explain myself will - at best - be pointless, and that the safest thing will be to give them no information whatsoever.

Wheres the fun in that..

I deliberately use a unisex shortening of my name. This stuff doesn't work for women. It makes life difficult

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/news/business/news/gender-inequality-man-woman-switch-names-week-martin-schneider-nicky-knacks-pay-gap-a7622201.html%3famp

It also forces people.to out themselves and I thought that was a hate crime...

I would not be doing it

Or, can I be pronoun free? You must always, only and ever refer to me by my proper noun?

If asked, I may respond with:

I am not comfortable putting my preferred pronouns in my signature but have no objection to you using whatever pronouns you wish.....

In fact, I think that is the perfect email signature.....

It’s such a classic case of ineffectual do-gooding it makes my head spin. The intention is to encourage people who might not otherwise feel able to, to share their gender identity so they can be more comfortable, right?

Imagine you’re a trans person not yet out in your workplace, and the pronouns edict arrives. What to do? You’re not out, you’re not ready to be out, you dont want to put either your sex based pronouns or your secretly preferred ones. Imagine the stress. Do you out yourself before you’re ready, or do you suffer with the wrong pronouns?

It doesn’t even do what it’s purported to do!

Also, shits on women due to stereotype threat. I work in a massively male dominated environment and really don’t need to be drawing more attention to the fact that I deviate from the norm there.

I wonder if we'd do better to view this as an opportunity, replying to HR emails with something like:

Due to the rampant sexism and misogyny in our society, I would like people to use the pronouns they/them when discussing me in written communications. This will allow me an opportunity to be judged on my own merits rather than being pigeonholed as a woman/female and thus (according to research) viewed as inferior to men/males.

Then don't do anything at all - I'm pretty sure they will put such an email in the 'Do not disturb' pile and avoid you thereafter like the plague

I an a teacher and have been Zooming lessons for the last few months, obviously, and is do depressing that do many 6th form girls (note:not boys) on their Zoom names are also putting their chosen pronouns -which are ALL she/her.

I gave my dd’s names that could be shortened to masculine names, precisely so that they could use them legitimately on CVS and professional correspondence so they didn’t have to reveal to anyone who didn’t know them that they were female.

Would i hell as like be inserting pronouns in my signature.

Perhaps N/A if forced.

@DoorbellsSleighbellsSchnitzel that’s absolutely the bottom line.

We’ve just had ‘encouragement’ to do the email pronoun........thing at my university in the last couple of weeks. Am ignoring.

Have found it mildly intriguing scrolling down at the end of every e-mail to note who HAS jumped on the bandwagon though.....

Was awaiting some kind of International Women’s Day bullshit that excluded women but I think the fact we’re not on campus has precluded these efforts a bit for now.

I wonder what Philip / Pips Bunce would put?

My answer would be:

Well off the top of my head, I ,me ,
he, him, her, she, it, we, us, you, they, them - have I missed any? These are the ones I use on a daily basis.

I prefer the standard mumsnet answer 'my pronouns are sex-based, like my oppression'.

“There are so many to choose from I am having trouble deciding.”

"My pronouns are: not relevant to the content of this email"

We are so lucky to have the word “it”. I am running with that.

It/its

Its absurd and I won't be doing it.

So don't then?
Were you told you had to?

(Fuck/off) those are my pronouns

All this is pure bollocks.

Which is up to you.

I'm seeing more people do this, clearly got nothing better to do

Why have they "got nothing better to do?" not everyone thinks the same way, and if they want to state their pronouns, if it makes life easier for them, why can't they?

[quote Outwithreason]@WackyDuck

But what if you're non-binary?[/quote]
Ha! Good one!!

Do you use your full name in company in emails or your initials?

If initials, I'd say you feel that interactions with staff/customers are better received when the assumption is that you are a man and as you have experienced negativity around your gender in the workplace previously you don't feel comfortable including your pronouns after your name as you feel your gender should be irrelevant.

It's really unfair to expect this as standard, I think.

I saw this shit on an email this week (public sector). Its absurd and I won't be doing it.