Scared to approach this. Advice needed from the wise women of the Feminist board

The member who is t was allowed to join the group. I don't think they can then be treated as a second class member who's not allowed to represent the group when they do meat the criteria.

The issue is with the basic principle of the group - for women, or for woman identified people? Was that the case from the beginning, has it changed, was that discussed with the membership & did they consent? Those seem to be the issues that have to be aired. Not so much what happens at one event. You identifying as pangender or whatever won't address that, it'll reinforce it in a way.

How is the group using the EA exemptions? My understanding is that a group could choose to be female sexed only, excluding those who are male sex with the p/c of gender reassignment, but in that case has chosen not to. But there is little case law on this & lawyers disagree. The ehrc guidence on this is being challenged (hopefully if Ann sinnott is given a judicial review).

Is the rule about the delegates your own group's rule, or the event's rule?

I doubt if I would be brave enough to raise this, but you may be!

I don't actually consider myself as having a gender (because I think it's nonsense)

Aha! You’re in, Hellfire: you’re genderfree, nonbinary, agender, whatever one of the 100 genders we’re now allowed to claim. Seriously, do state that, if you want to go to the event.

But like others here, I wouldn’t stay in a “women’s” group that includes males. Shame if the group is important to you, but it’s not standing up for women.

Regardless of whether the rules are discriminatory, it's absolutely wrong that someone should have to declare a disability, sexuality, gender or racial identity that they might not have otherwise wanted to disclose in order to meet this requirement.

I agree and would maybe make this point.

I'm actually incredibly angry about it to be fair. The audacity of this person to enter our group and demand blind acceptance, knowing full well that there's little us middle aged feminists can do about it - it's supremely arrogant IMO. It means that there seem to be so many things off the table for discussion, simply by dint of this person's presence.

That's why transactivists do this type of thing.

Regardless of whether the rules are discriminatory, it's absolutely wrong that someone should have to declare a disability, sexuality, gender or racial identity that they might not have otherwise wanted to disclose in order to meet this requirement.

Can you (or anyone) put yourself forward as belonging to one of the groups but not wanting to disclose which and how?

The very premise of the rules are discriminatory - so you're a white heterosexual woman and you can't go as you don't fit into these categories?

If there were several women interested in going could they join together to speak up? If that second spot has to be occupied by someone who has to match that criteria it excludes these women/members and is therefore discriminatory.

Do you have to say why you meet the criteria? Can you just say that you do (because you do)?

Is the event one at which there will be representatives from other groups, eg groups representing disabled people, LGBT etc?

I’d have to out myself as (genuinely) bi in those circumstances. Long time married so it isn’t relevant to my day to day life right now and apart from one adult child as it came up when discussing sexuality pretty much no one else in my life is aware.
I also (again genuinely) have two invisible disabilities that I’d prefer to not go public with at work although both cause me different problems I have to work around

I’d be a bit peed off with them that I had to go public for any of these for such a stupid reason and I think I would flag invisible disability but invoke right to not have to disclose medical info

You don't consider yourself as having a gender, therefore are agender. Put yourself forward on the basis of your ability to speak on the issues that will discussed, as a reasonable reflection of the group's membership and say you also represent a minority under the LGBTQ+ umbrella.

One person has been chosen and agreed unanimously, as she is the best person for the job.
The other person MUST be selected from the categories of disabled, BAME or LGBT.

I see these two rules are both discriminatory, it means that who ever wrote the rule thinks that the most qualified will always be white and able bodied.

I thought the same.
If none of the women are interested, I would put myself forward without identifying as anything I am not. Can you do that OP - just say you would like to attend if at all possible? If the others say that you don't qualify and instead choose someone who isn't even a woman, then so be it.

maybe you identifying could be the start of a wider conversation?

Could you table something about a recent news topic (the labour MP against single sex spaces, the treatment of Joanna Cherry, the Kiera Bell case) and raise some of the issues they bring up?

I wonder if this happens in the women institute? Or the national housewives register, if it still exists? Our actual women’s group had many productive interactions in the 70s with members of those groups. No men included then but I suspect things have changed ..

I think possibly the only thing you can do is make your case rationally and politely. It may be that a lot of women have quietly been thinking what you're thinking and you may have to have a difficult discussion on why a man has been allowed to join a women's group. If it gets difficult, resign and suggest that if there's anyone who agrees with your position they let you know privately and together you can create a new women's group that isn't open to male-sexed people.

This is what has happened in my lesbian circles. Some women decided it was appropriate to admit male-sexed people into some lesbian groups, resulting in breakaway female-sex-only groups — which, once all the fuss and accusations of terfery died down, seem to be thriving as more and more women realise they've been duped.

in a womans group, a man who identifies as a woman trumps all women Unless the woman has a disability, is bame, or lgbtq+

and it would be churlish to complain

take your pick op, disability, bame or lqbtq+ - if they go for identity politics rules, identify yourself in.

Assuming the post is real

I’m stunned that ‘disabled’ is in the ‘others’ group.
Is this post from the 70s?

And you don’t have a women’s group IMO, not if there’s a male in it.

I can dress in police uniform but that doesn’t allow me to arrest anyone however much I want to.

But you say that no one else in the permitted categories is interested in attending. Does that mean if it wasn't for the T person, only one person from your group would be allowed to attend? If so, the T person isn't taking a place from anyone else.

I think you will appear churlish if you complain. If a T person us allowed to join the group itself, then of course they are eligible to put themselves forward under the LGBT category. Would you complain if it were a disabled person?

There are over 100 genders pick one! Say you didn't really want to out yourself but this policy has forced you to as you really want to attend the meeting because x, y, z As someone up thread say play the game.
I too couldn't be in a women's group that included a TW I would have to leave but I respect your desire to stay and make change.

It is so illogical. For the transwomen to be in your group, the group has to believe they are female. And yet to attend the conference, the group has to remember they are male, otherwise they wouldn't be "T".

Are their any transmen in the group? I'd be interested to know whether transmen feel excluded if they see a group is composed of women and transwomen. It kind of highlights that the common characteristic for the group is gender ID, not sex.

I'm sorry but I would have had to leave the group the minute the transwoman was accepted. Because I'm not interested in a common gender group, I don't have a gender ID. I'd be perfectly happy to share a mixed sex group with a transwoman, or a common interest hobby group of course!

But I agree with PP, that you probably aren't "cis" (very few women are really). It would be interesting to find out how supportive the group are of your new agender status!

What is happening at this event? Are these two people representing your group going to be proposing things or asking questions etc on your group’s behalf? If so, will there be discussions beforehand for you all to put forward what you want to be discussed/asked etc? If not, why not? They are representing your group, not themselves

I don’t have a sensible answer sorry but this scenario highlights the ridiculousness of self ID and inclusivity policy.
If XY can identify as female then you can identify as disabled or BAME, there is no difference and people have and are already doing this.