Mrs HisFirstName

I am not Mrs Hisname, that’s his mother. Also, definitely not Mrs Hisinitial Hisname. I should’ve kept my name tbh.

AnotherEmma I agree.

Well obviously it's deeply annoying to have your first name replaced by your husband's but (and I may well get flamed for this) why are you so outraged by that and not by the fact that you have replaced your surname with your husband's and that you are using a title which indicates your marital status? It's all part of the same problem. I don't know why women seem to be ok with some of it but not all of it?! Frankly it's all wrong and we should all keep the names we're given at birth and use "Ms" as a title. Same as men keeping their names and using Mr.

And - in anticipation of defensive posts by women wanting to justify their own choices - THIS IS NOT AN ATTACK ON YOUR INDIVIDUAL DECISIONS. I'm talking about the big picture.

I was taught this at school and have always ignored it.

It’s VERY old fashioned now. Not even Tatler do it in their social pages anymore (!). So if it’s your 94 year old aunt, I’d let it go, but if it’s anyone under 80 pull em up on it. (And tell your husband it’s not 1957.)

We were taught that was the correct way to address an envelope at my all girls' school - early nineties, so perhaps that's why it hasn't died out yet

There is one person who does this to me. It infuriates me. My name isn't Simon. It's only a Christmas card but I'm tempted to send him one next year to Mr Jane just to make the point

I didn't change my name and am very firmly Ms, and this rarely happens to me. The only time it does is from my inlaws who go the whole hog with "Dr and Mrs D Smith ". I mean, wtf? They accept that we are two separate people and can split the dr from the mere missus, but I still get his initial.
Also birthday cheques for me have always had his surname and I have never yet cashed one. Never been commented on!

Apart from that they are very nice too!

I get this from my MIL but I just can't be bothered to worry about it!

I’ve been married twice and have never had this happen. I’d be annoyed if it did.

I didn't change my name upon marriage either and still got the Mrs hisname and Mr& Mrs hisfirstname hissurname.

I once had to collect a package at post office from inlaws and I was asked to show ID for a Mrs. Hisname that I didn't have.
When I asked inlaws to in future send anything in my actual name they decided I didn't exist anymore and sent even my birthday card in MR. Hisname.

I actually had to argue with dh recently over a train ticket he was buying for me and was clicking Mrs. Mysurname I corrected him and said no it's Ms. or nothing as my martial status is irrelevant for a train ticket.
He argued that I was in fact a Mrs and I pointed out that he was a Mr before and after marriage

I used to address things that way, because I'd been taught it was the right way. Then I woke up, realised how ridiculously sexist it was and stopped doing it. I've been married for 18 years and I don't actually ever remember receiving anything addressing me as Mrs Mrs husband's name surname.

Brilliant, a man telling you how to do feminism. They can't stop themselves, can they?

I hadn't realised that it was still a thing.
Ellen Wood the Victorian novelist and editor en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ellen_Wood_(author) had, and possiblly still has, all her books published as by Mrs.Henry Wood.

I've only ever had that from my in-laws.
If it's from a company then it's definitely a mistake that needs correcting.

This is my absolute pet hate. My DC's school does it.

My own bloody mother sends cards to Mr and Mrs DH first and last name

That's so strange fran.

I hate the fact that our utilities are in his name only, I pay half the bills so we should both be on. If they ever ring they will only speak to him.

Impossible to escape it! I didn't change my name when I got married but only a handful of people address letters to me in my actual name. Luckily my own family are in this group. I get Mrs Dave Smith from my husband's side of the family which I sort of understand as they are older, though it is annoying. What I find harder to deal with is good friends my own age who use my husband's surname on letters, or save me as husband's surname in their contacts for email etc. Why!!? I've never ever used that name, it's as if they don't know me at all.

When I was a student in the early 1980s, I absentmindedly addressed a birthday card to my mum in that way, and I absolutely never heard the end of it... I never made that mistake again (and kept my maiden name when I got married...) Surely nobody still does this.

i keep receiving post for Mrs Dave Smith.

Who on earth is doing this?

I find it extremely disrespectful.