Nowhere is safe from preferred pronouns

Moi aussi if you don’t mind @Grooticle and also @carlaCox

The company is starting to get quite insistent that we state we are this or that. Whether it be religion, colour or whatever. They want to be all cuddly and inclusive.

I will not be stating pronouns. They can do one.

They want to be all wokitywoke and they can if they like. I will pay no heed.

They will not allow bullying of people for religion or because they identify as x, y or z but are happy to do sweet Fanny adams about the bullying of women.

It is shameful.

LizzieSiddal that’s exactly what I thought!

Agreed - it's absolutely painful to see educated women who are obviously female putting she/her on their zoom call - and I'm saying women because in the past month I've seen around ten women doing this and only one man. Funny how this stating the blindingly obvious in order to make other people (but who exactly? It's all a bit of a mystery) feel at ease, has become filed under Women's Work ...

I'm part of a members organisation (in academia) and it's been just awful watching the President - Professor Pronoun - and her small inner coterie of female academics and female office staff all with their '[name] /she/hers' on zoom. Sometimes there's been more than a hundred members on the call, and not a single one has their pronouns. I think it makes Professor Pronoun and the leadership of the organisation look utterly out of touch with the members they're supposed to be representing and working for. To say nothing of the fact that it reveals they've signed up to an anti-science belief system, which does not exactly betoken intelligence or good judgement ...

A holiday club I use emailed to ask me what are my DS, age 6, preferred pronouns

What the heck?!

A holiday club I use emailed to ask me what are my DS, age 6, preferred pronouns. I just ignored it.

I do believe the argument is in solidarity with trans employees. However, the way that it is pushed has more of a feel of compulsion about it. I am not prepared to be compelled to say black is blue I'm afraid. I would probably do it out of politeness if it felt like a choice. It increasingly feels mandatory. That is why I don't want to.

"Drawing attention to the fact that I'm female has not served me well in the past"

I think this is a perfect reply - woke mate!

I am unlikely to ever need to state my pronouns in my line of work, but if I did, this would be my reply.

@Grooticle

So I replied (at some length) explaining that...

I am so going to steal that and use it myself (if you don't mind)

No it is serious- and actually the Twitterer has a point as Arabella and Grooticle have explained.

My work - male dominated and not woke. Diversity person has them. It will never catch on here and I will refuse, they can sack me, I have no fear of discomfort...see you at the tribunal (they won’t)

I was asked to state my preferred pronouns and they nagged me about it when I tried to ignore them, so I decided to out-woke them.

So I replied (at some length) explaining that

• if everybody starts stating their preferred pronouns, that puts pressure on people who may still be considering/exploring their gender identity to declare one way or the other before they feel ready to come out as their true authentic selves, so it’s best if some of us just decline to state them

• that stating or requiring people to use preferred pronouns could be very triggering for people struggling with gender identity

• that stating or requiring pronouns could be very confusing and stressful for people on the autistic spectrum or who are otherwise neuro-divergent

And that therefore I had decided to take a principled stand that I was not prepared to publicly state my preferred pronouns, or pressure anybody else to do so, but that for the avoidance of doubt I would certainly not be offended if people chose to refer to me using the pronouns which match my biological sex.

It’s all just such such bollocks, but if you work in an environment where you can’t say that I think being even more woke is the way to go :)

This hasn't arisen yet but I'm sure it will.
My original plan was to inform HR (when asked) that I considered my gender identity, along with my sexual orientation and religion to be none of their business. However after reading several threads, I now think I'll just say, 'No thanks' and if pressed for more, stick to, 'I don't want to.'
I've decided the less information I give them, the better.

I don’t specify my pronouns and won’t, for the record. I agree with Empress that it makes me respect people a little bit less. Either because I think they’re sheep who can’t think for themselves, or because they really believe in it. Not sure which is worse.

I see it but I’m in a big multinational tech co. The one I really don’t get is where someone who is obviously a woman (for example) says her pronouns are “she/they”. I mean, what? Surely if you’re fine with “she”, the obvious choice that accords with natural speech, you don’t need an alternative that absolutely nobody is going to use anyway?

A few people at my work have pronouns in their email signatures & it is a bit harder to take them seriously because of it.

Thankfully hasn’t happened to me yet. Tempted to put she/ the cat’s mother ....

Every time I've been asked to state pronouns or put them in a bio/signature I just ignore it or leave it blank. No one's confronted me about it...yet.

If they do my answer will be:
"Drawing attention to the fact that I'm female has not served me well in the past"

...And if they ask for more information than that then they can expect a half hour lecture about all of the instances of direct and indirect sex discrimination I've faced while at work, as well as a full run down of my experiences of sexual harassment from male colleagues. They will regret they ever asked.

I thought the who 'pronouns on your email sign off/bio/zoom name' thing was now supposed to be about solidarity with trans people, so that they don't feel 'outed' as being trans because they have put their pronouns up.

Quite a few of the 'influential' Instagram types (including a couple that I really rolled my eyes at) have started putting 'she/her' in their bio I have noticed recently.

Compelled pronouns are against the Yogyakarta Principles - can’t remember which bit exactly but it’s not ok to make people state their gender.

I'm tempted to change mine to he/him and see if anyone pays any more attention to me.

Because I'm a female on a low grade so ya know, what could I have to say of value.

twitter.com/redbreastedbird/status/1333869606835019777?s=20

Here's the excuse not to use them. It's very inconsiderate to compel the use of pronouns.