DD (13) has been shown Trans 101 video at school. Please help me draft a response.

'Don't say woman. Say uterus haver.'

There wasn’t much of this for my two older DSs, but my two younger DDs were exposed to this ideology in the schools and via having “trans” friends. I focussed my efforts on my children and guiding them through it. That’s what I would do in your shoes OP. Your first priority is your daughter and to sit with her and explain the logic holes and fallacies of this ideology. And that most of the “trans” stuff seen in the video is merely experimentations in fashion and a desire to look unique and different, aka “cool.” Then if you have time and energy think about writing the school and so on.

Not specific advice on how to approach school. BUT this podcase with Stephanie Davies Arai is a brilliant description of how we got to where we are and is really useful at considering the issues when it comes to the messages that kids are receiving. It might help formulate some questions/arguments. It is long, but really worth a listen.

filia.org.uk/podcasts/2020/11/9/stephanie-davies-arai-transgender-trend-questioning-gender-identity-teaching-in-our-culture-classroom-and-clinic?fbclid=IwAR1KrXL3q74J3mHJg2ypOwmagpc4XR-YIhxd4R2-F8b3aO-vnHo1MBdwUqg

Yeah, I'd be horrified if made-up woo woo gender ideology is being presented to children as fact by teachers, in school.

OP a central issue to me seems to be - do you think the things the video says are true & factual? If not what did it tell your child which you think is untrue? Could you distill the beliefs about gender/identity/sex which the video presents as a given? Does the head teacher believe those things to be true? No one wants their child to be taught untruths.

That seems to be the fundamental issue with the gender stuff that kids are being shown. It's not true.
If it was presented as 'some people feel like this... and see it like this...' it would be different.

Otherwise if it clashes with the government guidelines then that's your strongest bet.

I don’t know if video mentioned puberty blockers but if it does it would certainly be worth including the outcome of Keira bells case and asking why the school was showing info that is now very much incorrect?

Though I'd like to see your draft here OP please be careful about sharing personal info, not even personal info but identifying info about this situation. If the teacher concerned had any awareness of the 'debate' and came on here they might find this thread.

Sorry to be paranoid and it's probably fine but following the Tavistock judgement on Tues people are angry and looking to lash out. It's my experience anyway and it's only Thurs.

I hope you have success and your daughter is ok. I always like to see how these things conclude so maybe do post the result but with as little personal stuff as you can. To be fair you could be talking about any school in the country considering the pervasiveness of gender ideology in schools!

changing make up and hair
Trying to look like a cisgender person

This video is in conflict with the government guidance. Unless the school is in the 1950s I'm pretty sure that women are allowed to like whatever style of hair they want/ not wear makeup and still be a women.

I can see why you are horrified OP.

In view of the right to withdraw children from sex education, should the school not have warned you in advance?

Set of views, on correction. 'piece of information' is probably not accurate, I was trying to find a polite way to put it.

I'd stay with the main issues here OP, although it may be relevant to mention this could be looked at as encouraging girls to co operate in setting aside theirs and the school's safeguarding boundaries or to make girls' personal boundaries conditional on agreement from male children. And that is not something to be teaching young girls.

But the main focus really would be trying to find a polite way to inquire 'you appear to have taken advantage of your position in access to my child and having their trust to have presented a highly biased and questionable piece of information from a political lobby to her as objective truth. WTAF?'

Then why ‘horrified’? I don’t get it.

Why horrified? Sit down and discuss this with your daughter, ask her what she thought. How she feels. Are you worried that she’s suddenly going to want to be trans off the back of a video saying that trans people exist? And how they feel?

We are aware that topics involving gender and biological sex can be complex and sensitive matters to navigate.

Why should biological sex be complex and sensitive to navigate? It's just one facet of humanity.

Thanks nauticant I didn't watch the video (couldn't stand to the second post gave me enough to post on) but yeah that could have been shown in a U.K. school or any school.

MN is global and we get visitors to this board from all over so she could be in Australia, fair enough.

It's because the link is to an Australian organisation, www.trans101.org.au/video1.html, but these days that's often not indicative of anything.

Not sure where you got Australia from PP

Ruby the OP is clearly horrified at the content of the video shared and that her DD is now confused. It's not a long OP to read and no ambiguity. It's also not yet a hour since the OP posted, give her a chance to respond.

@RubyQ2010
Passive-aggressive with a side order of backhanded compliment.
No scare quotes? Missed a trick, there.

@veryconcernedparent you’ve asked quite a few questions and had lots of posts with suggestions, but you haven’t actually stated why you are horrified or what issues you want to raise.
I would have thought that if you are horrified, you would know why. As an intelligent person that can write a lucid post asking others what to say, you’re probably also capable of clearly articulating your own thoughts with supporting reasons why.

Isn’t the OP in Australia? Not sure what the guidance is there

fwiw - I would be livid that the school saw fit to show the children such utterly confusing and potentially damaging nonsense.