Pronouns at work - where do I stand? Advice

I've always been tempted to declare my pronouns as "she/him", just to fry people's minds.

Presumably if the person sending the email has an obviously woman's name like Sarah, lack of stated pronouns on the email isn't going to have any noticeable impact in terms of unconscious bias?

It underlines sex/gender when it should be irrelevant.

Not just "Here is an email from Sarah", but "Here is an email from Sarah the woman who identifies as she/her!!!".

Do you have a data protection officer? Because this kind of information could be personal and special data. And if it's being sent all over the place (eg new people get copied in, then it gets forwarded), there's no control over who is processing your data. You're also then having to process other people's data.

If push comes to shove and you are being coerced, you could just shrug and go with male pronouns and a gender-neutral or masculine version of your given name. Explain that female pronouns and name can result in harassment from misogynistic clients so you have the companies best interests at heart as well as your own safety.

Be ready to count the number of times you are subsequently misgendered and dead-named in emails and meetings. If all bullied female employees resorted to this tactic, demands for pronouns in bios would quickly disappear.

Let the woke be hoist with their own petard. Let them beware of what they want for fear of getting it.

I'd find it very hard to resist giving opposite sex pronouns just to watch and see how many people go along with it.

And say absolutely nothing else about it, and change nothing else about yourself. Just the pronoun answer.

And reverse the answer weekly.

Dare them to be transphobic and question your identity in any way. Make /them/ squirm.

can't remember the last time a female colleague was referred to as Mrs in work or out!

I thought about this because I was applying for access to something yesterday (work related) and had to choose. I assume its because they want to maintain a level of formality if they contact me, but I still felt that I was forced to make a choice and reveal something too personal - even 'Ms' isn't as neutral as 'Mr'.

The irony is that the GRA 2004 was introduced to protect the right to privacy.

Tell them they’re putting some trans people in a very awkward position by pressuring them to publicly disclose their gender identity when many of them won’t be able or ready to. Don’t confirm or deny whether you are one of those people. You don’t have to.

Years ago I used to work in customer service. Because of the area of London we were in there was a high proportion of staff that were Indian, and they would get racial abuse where customers assumed they were calling India. My male colleague asked that his email and display was changed to a generic-type "English" name, and used this name when he answered calls as he was sick of the harassment. It disappeared overnight.

My point is unconscious bias is a definite "thing" and the link by a pp of a man's experience of this is perfect.

MerryMouse has a really good point - can't remember the last time a female colleague was referred to as Mrs in work or out!

Its bonkers this coercion to get women to declare their sex. I've applied for a number of civil service jobs and they all ask you to leave any information off that might idenfity you race, religion, age and sex. They are clearly acknowledging that there could be a bias when recruiting if they didn't. So how do we get to the point that some companies are now trying to force women into declaring their sex??

I like FindtheTruth's reply.

It's bad enough having to choose between Miss/Mrs/Ms without having to add pronouns.

OP, this sub-group are just plain wrong and have not thought this through.

It's not fair to force anyone to declare a gender identity, whether that is because they know they would face discrimination because of it, or because they are unsure of their gender identity or because they don't want to be outed.

These are all brilliant answers. I’m unlikely to be asked as I’m semi-retired now but when I was asked at a conference full of strangers, I just told them I’m not bothered by how people refer to me in my absence so they can use whatever pronouns they want.

I much prefer the focus on harassment and coercion though.

"It's outing to trans people who are not ready to go public with their transition."

If really annoyed, I might ask them if they thought it was appropriate to ask people to include their sexual identity in their email signature, and, if not, then why their gender identity?

"I will happily use colleagues declared pronouns. I've chosen not to add pronouns to my display name and ask that you respect that and not pressure me into using them or treat me differently for not using them."

I am agender, meaning I am comfortable with both masculine and feminine gender traits. To not makenit hard for people I am fine if people use the pronouns of my sex.

'I was keen on this voluntary initiative but I am unhappy with the pressure being applied which implies that not adding pronouns will be seen negatively - there are lots of reasons someone might have to not choose to do so and I dislike them feeling compelled or under pressure. Therefore respectfully I am going to decline.'

My pronouns are sexed based like my oppression"

"I'm finding this triggering. I'm not ready to discuss this"

"It's very insensitive to insist on this"

"I am female"

"Pronoun - Dr"

"There is real unconscious bias against females. It's just not on - this coercion."

"I don't wish to be harassed by service users if they find out I am a woman"

"I don't feel comfortable declaring my pronouns"

"It's triggering"

“Being repeatedly asked about this is in contravention if principle 6 of the Yogyakarta Principles and I’d therefore appreciate if you’d desist”

FindTheTruth Just putting everyone else's replies together in a handy list.

I don't feel comfortable declaring my pronouns

This.

“Being repeatedly asked about this is in contravention if principle 6 of the Yogyakarta Principles and I’d therefore appreciate if you’d desist”

The Yogyakarta Principles is a document about human rights in the areas of sexual orientation and gender identity, published as the outcome of an international meeting of human rights groups in Yogyakarta, Indonesia, in November 2006.

Principle 6 specifically talks about right to privacy in this regard.

@PurpleHoodie nice replies! particularly like "It's very insensitive to insist on this"

They can’t make you surely?