Can’t work out how I feel about this

31 replies

Doryhunky · 20/09/2020 04:53

I live alone with my two children, one a young teen. I am looking for a lodger and don’t feel comfortable sharing my home with a man. I feel bad because some of them seem perfectly fine from their ad. I guess this is a bit of an AIBU but my gut says no.

OP posts:

BlackWaveComing · 20/09/2020 05:19

You are statistically safer having a woman as a lodger. Don't feel bad about it; it's a sensible decision.

KihoBebiluPute · 20/09/2020 05:13

yanbu at all. having a lodger is challenging at best, there is nothing wrong with narrowing down the categories of people that you feel comfortable about allowing to live in your home. this is not a case where you should be equally willing to accept any of the 7 billion people on the planet with no preference. this is your home and the person who moves in will have a massive impact on your life. obviously simply being a woman rather than a man doesn't guarantee a good experience but it massively reduces some of the risks inherent in moving in a stranger into your home.

joystir59 · 20/09/2020 05:10

I would not have a man live in my home, not even a close friend that I have known and loved for many years let alone a stranger

user1464552773 · 20/09/2020 04:59

YANBU at all. You would feel safer with a woman because you would be safer.

DeliciouslyFemale · 20/09/2020 04:59

It’s not your job to make men feel accepted or to prove that NAMALT. There will be enough women in their lives doing that. Your job is to keep you and your family safe. You decrease your risk of comfort and safety by having a strange man in your house, even if it is by a small percent. Stop thinking that you have to be a support human for men.

Lottapianos · 20/09/2020 04:55

Completely understandable, I wouldn't want to share my home with a man I dont know from Adam either. I would feel much safer with a woman, that's because statistically, we ARE much safer with a woman

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