The gender politics of food

Is this the one thing airlines (usually) get right - they generally serve the 'special requirements' meals first, to the customers who've requested them. And then if there's any extra veggie meals left they're available as an extra option for whoever's next served.
(We've quite often preordered veggie meals as they're more likely to be edible)

DS loves the Linda McCartney pulled pork or mozzarella burgers.

Apologies, meant to tag @NiceGerbil

Sorry Jelly!

No bull burgers from Iceland @JellySlice

I like the plain quarter pounders. They also do Chinese style ones and pulled pork but as a lifelong veggie I find the texture of them a bit much.

I've had my vegan/milk free with fish/no dairy options removed from separate storage and labelled with my name and eaten before now.

Meant I was left with a single slice of cold meat feast pizza. When the pizza bit was the entire reason I'd been ordered a separate meal in the first place.

I kicked up such a public stink because I'm too old to give a fuck about what anybody thinks anymore, the boss made the men who had either taken it or kept quiet as one of them blatantly stole my food all hand over cash so they could order me something else.

I got twenty quid's worth of posh sushi that way.

Mind you, I've also been informed at a do at a curry house that if I was going to order vegetarian shite, I could fuck off because 'we eat MEAT' I corrected them 'vegan, actually - and you lot can fuck right off first unless you want to take my fucking milk allergy with you'.

I always make a fuss when it happens. Don't piss me about with food, I'm not scared of the penises attached to the choring pigs and they all know it.

Buffet style or unplated meals can be a nightmare. A few years ago we went to a club function where the food was prepared by an outside caterer. The plates were handed out and each table had their food presented on serving plates passed around. A couple of ladies at the top of the table helped themselves to large portions, by the time it got to us DH and myself had a few veg plus a single slice of beef between us (as did another couple) not even gravy. We pointed out the issue to the organisers and since then the caterers have been serving pre plated (this has also raised complaints by some about the portions being too small).

I have great sympathy for those organising these dos, a thankless task.

This in spades!

Getting somewhat off topic now!

Another one. The amount of times I've asked for a Coke and get given a diet Coke are unbelievable.

I like big field mushrooms with cheese in but most of DH family hates mushrooms, most of our BBQ are big family dos. So I don't do them :(

Ah yes halloumi for the veggies but who doesn't like halloumi! So yes loads.

We've not found a satisfactory veggie burger, got any recs?

Interesting thread. Quite a few sad stories of entitled behaviour though! I must live in a parallel world to some pp because I've never come across workmates unrepentingly eating someone else's diet-specific dish or the men at a wedding stuffing themselves so there's hardly anything for the women.
I have come across gender stereotyping in restaurants re bill/alcohol vs soft drinks/ desserts though, or the assumption that it's my DH who'll want the red meat.

Is drinking through a straw emasculating

'. If I'm doing a BBQ or something and there are vegetarians, I don't make a separate veggie meal for them, but I will make a LOT of vegetarian side dishes because I know that everyone will eat the veggies, the vegetarians just won't eat the meat'

I do this too! And the leftovers all get eaten gradually lol

Differences in local/ family/ etc groups causing confusion I think!

I was at a wedding a couple of years ago and was the only singleton on a table of couples. All of the women on my table had either ordered the chicken dish which they picked at, or the lamb but gave the meat to the men. They looked horrified that I not only ordered the lamb, but actually ate it all myself.

Growing up my brothers always got bigger portions and the better cuts of meat. Which never really made sense as I was a dancer and always ravenous. I've ended up with a very bad relationship with food and am now morbidly obese :(

DS1 is pescetarian and the amount of people who tell him he should eat meat because he's a man is astonishing

I’ve noticed this a lot in my own family, and anecdotally among friends. On holidays, for instance, dh might eat a fry for breakfast and not be particularly hungry again until dinner time, and is quite obtuse about the dc’s need to eat earlier in the day.
He’s not at all mean, or unwilling to pull his weight in the kitchen, but it’s as if he cannot quite process the dissonance.

My father was like this. He was an incredibly kind, generous man. But this was his one huge blind spot. My mother always said that when we were growing up, we'd be off on a day out, car full of us kids and he'd say something like 'we don't need lunch, I'm not hungry'. And she'd have to spell it out to him that actually just because he wasn't hungry didn't mean that no one else needed to eat. And he'd be amazed every single time.

one vegetarian while cooking lasagna ‘- I make one large meat and one large vegetarian because inevitably the meat eaters would rather have a small piece of each. I don't understand why this isn't standard‘

You could make two different vegetarian dishes and then everyone could have a bit of each.

On the buffet thing, I totally agree that the veggie food should be the bulk. If I'm doing a BBQ or something and there are vegetarians, I don't make a separate veggie meal for them, but I will make a LOT of vegetarian side dishes because I know that everyone will eat the veggies, the vegetarians just won't eat the meat. Ditto, one vegetarian while cooking lasagna - I make one large meat and one large vegetarian because inevitably the meat eaters would rather have a small piece of each. I don't understand why this isn't standard.

On the OP's chicken/lamb thing, I get this. When I worked in the city and used to do a lot of business lunches, I always felt self conscious if I ordered the beef or lamb. which of course, was completely ridiculous. But the weird sub conscious thing that the woman should want the chicken, fish or salad option is very hard to beat. It was particularly annoying for me as at the time we ate very little red meat at home so I loved to order beef or lamb when out.... Usually I would just order it anyway, but there were times I didn't because of ridiculous worrying about being judged.

‘Were there sufficient portion sizes available for people who may have been bigger eaters than the cooks? If there was a lot of meat left over, it sounds like too much was cooked. That's not the fault of the guests, who may have been unaware of dietary requirements of other guests.’

Would you act like this if another guest at a wedding cooked you a meal? Would you start complaining that your portion wasn’t big enough or that the meal wasn’t balanced? Would you not make sure that everyone got a share?

I’ve been at meals for 20 people. I wouldn’t stack up a plate without making sure there was enough left for the people cooking. They are not servants.

And perhaps that does come back to women being treated as if they are.

Buffets I've been to, generally people take a reasonable amount and then after everyone has had something, people who want more go back for 'seconds'.

Barbara, I don’t know. It wasn’t my post.

All of the people cooking were also guests. 20 people isn’t many. They should have left a choice for the people in the kitchen who had cooked for them.