Gender politics of eating a roast chicken!!

Wait, why were you carving when there was a Man of the House there?

Men get served first, asked what they want, then children, then the women get what's left.

Have never known this either!

@CuriousaboutSamphire
I’m sure that was valid within your family circumstances. But on a more general level I’ve heard these explanations many times as a sort of blanket explanation for penis portions. it always strikes me that while men’s physical labour was always recognised, the calorific needs of women’s work gets ignored. Hauling water from wells while pregnant and carrying small children wasn’t light work either.

When I was growing organs in my first trimester pregnancies, I sometimes ate a second dinner. And similarly when my body was producing food to support a small human. But it’s rare to come across ingrained family meal rituals that acknowledge female calorific needs. Instead, traditionally, these things were women’s issues that were blanketed in silence.

It absolutely makes sense to give men higher calorie portions in certain circumstances, but it should be challenged when it’s no longer based on necessity and has just become a ritual.

In our house it was men got served first. Then children. Women got what was left.

Can anyone explain what a penis portion is? Is it just giving a man a larger helping of food because they have a bigger appetite or they need more?

Never heard of this - everyone chooses what they like.

Chivalry is a form of misdirection. And on one short sentence historical romance is dead; Shakespeare irrelevent and King Arthur a Once, Never to Return King

@timeisnotaline I would contend that chivalry evolved as a narrative with the dual purposes of constraining and legitimising patriarchal violence.

In its courtly form, it dresses up maurading and murder as knight’s code, and in elevating some women as unattainable creates a hierarchy of female sexuality that is owned and controlled by men.

Doing something for so called chivalrous reasons, is usually unexamined sexism. Often the same chivalry extended to upper middle class women is used to oppress other less privileged classes where these things really matter. Chivalry is a form of misdirection.

It’s funny how something that probably started out as a personal preference becomes an ingrained stereotype to keep everyone in their plac It was more about feeding the man who worked down a pit, on dockyards in my famly; farming and factories in DHs.

Those 'penis portions' used to be based on need. It is habit and outdated custom that maintains them.

It’s funny how something that probably started out as a personal preference becomes an ingrained stereotype to keep everyone in their place.

Have you ever challenged it? I think it’s really important to, and very effective to do it with polite puzzlement. “But why?” is a very useful starting point for dismantling everyday sexism.

When my in-laws come for Christmas they only eat breast, and when my family come there aren’t enough legs on the turkey. We used to feed the breast to the cat.

and women thet the dry chest? If that's the case you are cooking it wrong. Try cooking it upside down, or pushing herbed butter under the skin.

I'm from Liverpool, DH is Gloucester born and bred.

We still do this. Both brought up with it as 'the norm'.

The difference now is we also choose to do it differently, sometimes!

And the dog gets the wings!

So men get the most tender part of the meat and women thet the dry chest? Never heard of this no sense.

I agree with this - it might be outdated but the basis for this is chivalry! I was always aware that the breast was considered the premium cut, so may have been seen as ‘good manners’ to offer this to ‘ladies first’, as well as it being carved boneless.

I was always aware that the breast was considered the premium cut, so may have been seen as ‘good manners’ to offer this to ‘ladies first’, as well as it being carved boneless.

But brought up in the midlands with Yorks grandparents, I never encountered this.

We tussle over the thighs.

In other families / cultures the wing rules.

There is a poem by a ME poet, a woman whose name begins with a Ch I think, about the ceremonial dividing if the chicken along hierarchical family lines. The Dad gets first choice / best bits.

From the south and I grew up with this. I put it down to my DF getting stuck with what my DM wouldn't eat!!

White meat for women here. Delicate, less fat, no bones so easier.

Shock at the table when american DiL asked for leg meat as it has more flavour.

Now DH has breast as he doesn't like bones or flavour. Mic Tür for everyone else,

Oh, and from the same relative, the wings are the cook's perk as they wouldn't usually be served to paying customers, but are tasty and you wouldn't throw them away.

I've not heard of this, though my nan always gave the men more meat when doing a roast.

I don't like dark meat so it would be the same in my house simply bc my partner likes legs and I don't.

Legs are more calorific and fatty, it’s just another variation on penis portions really.

Growing up, we kept a tally and had a fair chicken rota - I.e, if you had a leg last time, you got breast this time, no matter who you were in the family. Guests would always be given first choice though.

I know lots of people who only ever gave the legs to the men and breasts to the women/children. I used to look longingly at the legs when having dinner at a friend's house but was never allowed.

My in-laws look aghast every time they serve up chicken and DH and I promptly swap plates. He prefers white meat, and I prefer dark but it gets commented and tutted on every single time.

(For those on the Christmas dinner thread, yes, these are the same in-laws who have never heard of fish for breakfast)