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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

“You can’t say “he” or “she” anymore, you have to say “the”.

58 replies

Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:06

Just had a chat with my 13 year old niece. Apparently when she goes back to school in September they have been told that they can’t say “he” or “she” any more, they have to say “the” and gave the example, “The hit me”.

My niece couldn’t explain why, just that they have to do it.

Apparently my brother and SIL think it is ridiculous but don’t want to complain or cause trouble.

This is in Suffolk. Is anyone else aware of anything like this? For a second I thought she was joking until I realised she was absolutely serious.

I’m so upset and frustrated by this.

OP posts:
DeaconBoo · 08/09/2020 11:27

@Mycatismadeofstringcheese has your niece gone back yet? Presumably this was all a misunderstanding?

Aesopfable · 16/08/2020 21:36

But ‘thee’ means ‘you’ not he or she, along with thou, thy, thine...

ChurchOfWokeApostate · 16/08/2020 21:24

Tbh, it wouldn’t surprise me.
People are scoffing, but many things were scoffed at as ‘never happening’.... until they did.

Who would have believed a policeman would turn up at someone’s place of employment to ‘check their thinking’.
I’m sure that would have been scoffed at as a half heard rumour.
I’m not saying it is or isn’t true, but honestly, nothing would surprise me these days

Skyliner001 · 16/08/2020 09:11

@ItsLateHumpty

This all sounds very nebulous, OP.

I’d wait til you know something more concrete and I’d stop trying to second guess what other changes may have been made eg you've now guessed they have mixed sex toilets.

Transgender people might have their own preferred pronouns, but I’ve yet to see a whole school make a unilateral decision to mis-sex or mis-gender all pupils, trans or otherwise.

If ‘the’ is the pronoun being foist on everyone, trans pupils will be just as unhappy as your DN.

Well said ITslate
highame · 16/08/2020 07:08

Also, it would be headlines news and big fails at exam time.

Could it be friends winding each other up. They know what's going on and lots of them think it's stupid.

ItsLateHumpty · 16/08/2020 02:17

This all sounds very nebulous, OP.

I’d wait til you know something more concrete and I’d stop trying to second guess what other changes may have been made eg you've now guessed they have mixed sex toilets.

Transgender people might have their own preferred pronouns, but I’ve yet to see a whole school make a unilateral decision to mis-sex or mis-gender all pupils, trans or otherwise.

If ‘the’ is the pronoun being foist on everyone, trans pupils will be just as unhappy as your DN.

skql · 16/08/2020 02:01

compelled speechAngry

334bu · 16/08/2020 01:31

I thought the gender neutral pronoun was spelt "ze" However this could not be confused with they as surely it would be pronounced as if it were "dz". Personally I prefer "co" but not sure how it is pronounced. If it is an open "o" sound might be confusing way up north where " caw" has a totally different meaning.
Must be worrying for your niece though.

theskyispink · 16/08/2020 01:10

Do you mean "zhe" - the gender-neutral pronoun?

Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:50

I said apparently because I didn’t ask my niece for written proof of what she told me when I asked her about looking forward to going back to school. It was a short conversation.

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Quaagars · 15/08/2020 21:49

"There might be a school, possibly academy somewhere in Suffolk, name unknown, where according to a possibly confused 13 yr old you can’t say “he” or “she” anymore, you have to say “the” ....or maybe it's "they" "

What you just said - sounds like a half heard conversation to me!
I'd be wanting to know exactly what was said, as sounds a load of rubbish!

bravefox · 15/08/2020 21:41

OP think you need to ask MNHQ to rename this thread:

"There might be a school, possibly academy somewhere in Suffolk, name unknown, where according to a possibly confused 13 yr old you can’t say “he” or “she” anymore, you have to say “the” ....or maybe it's "they" "

If I were you I'd make sure I knew a bit more before I get 'upset and frustrated'

DeaconBoo · 15/08/2020 21:40

What does "apparently" mean in your op? Someone in authority somewhere just verbally said this? How unusual!

Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:32

I think it’s an academy and super strict. The detention for breathing wrongly type. Zero tolerance. That’s why she’s worried.
I know general location but not name.

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Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:25

I don’t think she was winding me up, she’s not that type. She could be confused though and it is actually they. Either was it’s bizarre.

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bravefox · 15/08/2020 21:24

@Mycatismadeofstringcheese

I don’t know the name of the school. I don’t live locally to them and the school name has never come up in conversation.
Ok no problem. If you want to DM me once you find out, I'm happy to check what the deal actually is.
Skyliner001 · 15/08/2020 21:23

Literally never heard of that. Are you sure she's right? Sounds like she's winding you up with "the"

Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:22

Even if I did know it I would be wary of posting anything that could identify and cause trouble for my niece.

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Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:21

I don’t know the name of the school. I don’t live locally to them and the school name has never come up in conversation.

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Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:19

She’s not a bolshy teen. She’s gentle and sensitive. She’s never in trouble. I really feel for her.

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bravefox · 15/08/2020 21:18

If you are sure this is true, why can you not name the school?

Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 15/08/2020 21:17

Maybe it is they and she’s got confused but that just shows how confusing it is.

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Frlrlrubert · 15/08/2020 21:17

Sorry, I meant literal violence I think

Frlrlrubert · 15/08/2020 21:16

Bizarre. Can you convince a bolshy teen to claim that misgendering them in such a way is a literal crime?

MajesticWhine · 15/08/2020 21:15

How very strange. If I was a parent I would be asking for an explanation. Eg how might this impact on the students’ progress in English. I can’t imagine them doing too well in their creative writing if they write “... and the went to the shops... “