Showing that feminists don't all hate heterosexual male sexuality

i recently had a conversation with a man i'd hitherto considered attractive during which he mentioned that he didn't know who Kenny Rodgers is. For some reason this gap in his knowledge downgraded his attractiveness in my eyes.

funny old world innit?

There is a couple who are actors and when he was first doing the talk show rounds he got a lot of "You're married to who???" and how is that possible. He made Emily Blunt laugh the first time she met him is the short answer.

Makes two of us! I also care about the CD or record collection.

When an otherwise lovely man wears Crocs in public I just shake my head sadly, and give him a look that says "I'm not angry, I'm disappointed".

Hear hear, @MrsTerryPratchett!

What's on a man's bookshelf is far more important than what's on their driveway. But that might be me!

I know, I know, here is my own pocket of hypocrisy!

If you were to rank attractive qualities in a male partner, for women, "charm" would be so far above "car" that you'd have a hard time displaying the results on the same page.

"a man who makes me laugh"

Most men don't seem to understand how very important having a sense of humor is to women.

I've never seen women asked what they find attractive in men put the kind of car he drives in the Top 5, but sense of humor consistently ranks in the Top 5 of what women want, a lad who keeps them smiling and laughing and isn't so damnably earnest he can't chuckle at himself.

Yep! He wouldn't be my generation's universal go-to if he wasn't known for being a lovely bloke.

Keanu is a classic example. He was always good looking. But considered a bit blah (by many). The constant stories of him being kind, and decent, and polite, and having strong relationships which have been very difficult... they make him actually attractive.

Also he's an immortal, which is cool.

You can have my share, SciFiScream, so that should leave him with enough energy and time to recover!

If we're doing sci fi then definitely Keanu Reeves, who will be a very busy man if we're playing this game.

Engage?

Impressive if he can manage three times at his age :)

Well I'll have him 3 times obviously

I see non man hating feminists were offering to prove it by selecting certain men

I'll have Patrick Stewart. Thanks

I see non man hating feminists were offering to prove it by selecting certain men

I'll have Patrick Stewart. Thanks

I see non man hating feminists were offering to prove it by selecting certain men

I'll have Patrick Stewart. Thanks

I'm willing to bet one of the most popular pictures of Tom Hardy on the internet is the one with the dog. Caring, sweet, loving and hot. Not just toxic masculinity.

He's a long way off from being my type but the whole story of how he got the dog is adorable and slotted him into the "good bloke as well as good actor" category in my mind. Still don't fancy him, but if I was at all inclined to the dog would seal the deal much more effectively than any sort of vehicle. In fact if we're giving suggestions then "get a dog" isn't a bad one. I have a friend of a friend who has a tiny, adorable Pomeranian, which is possibly one of the least "manly" dogs you could own, and he seems to meet a quite ridiculous amount of women when he takes it to the park, because lots of people want to pet cute dogs.

The hypothetical alpha male, as described, sounds like he's performing gender as hard as he possibly can, which is tedious to be around. I also know a former special forces dude (Russian Spetsnaz) and he's not particularly macho, but if you ever need someone to organize something that you're looking at going "well this is a big old pile of chaos" he's your guy.

Well, if we're being honest I'd probably be put off by a man in a pick-up truck as the associations aren't to anything I'm fond of at all, so maybe they just asked the wrong women. Me, personally, I'd be more interested in whether he has a nice arse than whether he has a nice car, so again, depends who you ask really.

Like others I wonder why this is meant to be a problem for feminists to solve. I find the idea of trying to change who people are attracted to pretty dodgy in general, and resent the suggestion that I should do so because someone else finds it hard to chat up women.

Dervel that post at 13.22

@IronPyrites if you like that consider watching Germaine Greer’s debate on pornography: she makes some very good points I think are relevant here.

@ErrolTheDragon you are 100% correct there. It’s also exacerbated by those who may achieve excellence in one narrow area of life, and expect the kudos and deference in all areas.

As with anything we do it is good to aim for the Aristotlean mean, that is to say too much of a virtue can become a flaw as surely as a deficiency in it can. Like too much courage becomes foolhardiness just as too little becomes cowardice.
A healthy level of confidence places one at the centre of their world not at the centre of THE world.

It is true confidence goes a long way

Misplaced confidence can go a long way in undesirable directions, until it's rumbled. People with a 'can do' attitude who, when push comes to shove, can't, can be a significant problem.