Diversity week-do my dc need to know they're teachers ' sexuality?

I have a close friend who's gay and she told me that even in 2020 the number of people who whenever she spoke about her and her [very female sounding] wife's name doing anything, and even when they were face to face, she constantly got 'oh is [wife's name] your friend/sister/housemate,' etc. as the first assumption rather than gf/wife!

Oh fgs. Crying homophobia. Every single criticism dismissed as bloody phobia. It’s not. You know nothing about me but I laugh at the suggestion that this is why I object to it. It isn’t. It’s because I want teachers to have distance, authority and privacy. Space and headspace to do their jobs without having to share details of their private lives. It’s cringeworthy, absolutely cringe inducing, to think of any teacher discussing a forthcoming wedding with pupils. It’s absolutely none of their business and distracts from the business of learning.

The sense of what counts as diversity is really rather narrow. Is this stuff outside the scope of publicly funded education or not?

I have no issue with teachers sharing these details about themselves if they are happy to do so. The way they did it was maybe a bit cringe but at long as they are actively practicing what they preach and not simply doing it in a Tokenistic way I wouldn’t mind.

As a teacher myself you’d never catch me holding up a sign saying anything. 2 mins on photoshop and it could be changed to anything. How daft of the school!

IME it’s better if things are just treated as natural - eg ‘Mr X and his boyfriend have just done a sponsored walk.’ Rather than ‘guess what! Mr X is GAY

Right so what if Mr X is single and doesn’t have a boyfriend to do a sponsored walk with? Would you also say similar things to a disabled person talking about their disability in public that perhaps they should pipe down and not make it a big thing in case others feel uncomfortable, maybe just be in a picture or two in their wheelchair so that people put two and two together?

I have no problem with teachers being open about their relationship status. Same sex relationships are, quite rightly, legal and children should get equally as excited for a teacher's forthcoming marriage to a same sex partner as they do for a heterosexual wedding.

My worry is that the diversity week will actually major on the T of LGBT. Completely correct horror at homophobia and a definition of transphobia that includes any questioning of gender identity as a concept or a statement that biological sex is real and can't be changed, means we end up with 'ambassadors' in schools who encourage children who don't fit stereotypes to consider that they might be in the wrong body, that they might really be the other sex. This is how we end up with the situation covered by Newsnight last week with a clinic prescribing life-changing drugs after a single one hour consultation.

www.transgendertrend.com/category/schools/

Secondly, if I was asked to do this as a teacher I’d HATE it! I’d feel really stupid, I’d probably have to make something up or I’d have to hold a placard saying ‘I’m a woman’ or ‘I like Cheese’ or something.

Presumably it wasn’t compulsory. Lots of gay people are proud of who they are and are happy to do this. Just as many professional women are happy to speak at women’s day events, talk about equality in the workplace etc. Same for loads of other minorities. And they don’t even make silly jokes about liking cheese when doing it, presumably because they realise that diversity is an important topic and that progress is only made through direct action.

IME it’s better if things are just treated as natural - eg ‘Mr X and his boyfriend have just done a sponsored walk.’ Rather than ‘guess what! Mr X is GAY!’

This ^^

Obviously a school should not disparage homosexuality in any way, but it need not go any further.

Sounds a lot like section 28 tbh. Tolerate not celebrate etc.

I don't know, I can't seem to find the words to accurately describe why I don't think it's right.

I think I can offer some assistance there as to ‘why you don’t think it’s right’ but would have no issue with the whole class making cards for Miss Smith’s upcoming (hetero) wedding.

I don't think making people stand with a sign in front of them, with what people would consider them to be different for, is the way to go about it really. I don't feel like that's normalising anything, infact I think it's doing the opposite.

Exactly how I feel.

You think that a teacher telling pupils he’s gay means he’s grooming them?

No of course not, I wasn't referring to that. I was referring to the assembly this teacher led where he asked year 7s their sexuality.

Honestly read the thread.

I have two worries about this. Firstly, that it highlights differences and makes a ‘thing’ of them rather than normalising. IME it’s better if things are just treated as natural - eg ‘Mr X and his boyfriend have just done a sponsored walk.’ Rather than ‘guess what! Mr X is GAY!’ Secondly, if I was asked to do this as a teacher I’d HATE it! I’d feel really stupid, I’d probably have to make something up or I’d have to hold a placard saying ‘I’m a woman’ or ‘I like Cheese’ or something.

I’m really surprised at some of the comments on here.
Why is it such a big deal to you? Why does knowing that teacher is gay make you feel so squeamish? If I saw that video, I’d just think ‘oh that’s nice’ or ‘oh, okay then’ and then think nothing more of it.
Does that include grooming 11 year olds to declare their sexuality?
You think that a teacher telling pupils he’s gay means he’s grooming them? Do you mean trying to turn them gay?
That is homophobic.
This was the attitude that brought in Section 28 and it’s gone. Good riddance.
OP: what if it was a lesbian holding up that sign? Would you mind that so much?

The reason why diversity needs to be celebrated is because we still don’t have equality. These sorts of comments about why you have to label yourself show such ignorance. It’s because unless you do label yourself visible, the status quo will never be challenged. Instead of thinking about your own distaste at hearing that a teacher is gay, think about what it might do for a child who is confused about their sexuality to see some positive role models that they can look up to. When I was at school, I am pretty sure that some of the teachers were gay but they never mentioned it because it was the 90s and homophobia was rampant. There were ostensibly zero gay kids in my year as a result but within a few years of leaving school, a number had come out, some of them friends of mine. They absolutely never felt comfortable being open about who they were at school but kids now do, which is great (and probably helped by what you call cringeworthy diversity campaigns).

And fucking hell at ‘promoting’ gayness. Seriously??? I bet you wouldn’t bat an eyelid at a straight teacher mentioning their family/getting married/going on maternity leave, all of which involve disclosing one’s sexuality. I used to like the feminist section of MN but I rarely come on here due to what it’s become.
Hell, when I was at school we had several pairs of married couples working there. Won’t someone think of the children. Their sexuality was rammed down our throat constantly. No time to focus on all the STEM subjects like we all should have done.

I'm all for religions, sexualities, race etc being discussed in normal conversation, of course it's good to teach children about people's differences, but I don't think making people stand with a sign in front of them, with what people would consider them to be different for, is the way to go about it really. I don't feel like that's normalising anything, infact I think it's doing the opposite.

I’m a bit puzzled by people saying it’s wrong of teachers to share these small human details.
I definitely dont think it's wrong to share boring details of life ( "What did you do at the weekend Miss?" " My wife and I went to IKEA") It's normal for students to learn bits and bobs about their teachers lives.
It's not necessary for teachers to label themselves or expect students to do the same.

This is quite shocking that people like the OP still think like this. Talking about your husband and kids is talking about your sexuality. Oh AND given that gay people still face prejudice (as this thread has demonstrated) it is actually necessary to be a bit more vocal about it. This smacks of ‘why do they have to ram it down our throats’ or ‘I might come out as straight’ that the homophobes trot out.

When kids are still being called dyke, fag, poof, bender, gaylord, bummer etc it needs to go a lot further.

A sexuality isn’t a lifestyle.

Good for that teacher.

Does that include grooming 11 year olds to declare their sexuality?

It all turns on the word “promote”.

I don’t see any need for a school to “promote” any lifestyle, heterosexual or homosexual. I want school to promote English, maths, science and whatever other subjects kids are taking exams in. Obviously a school should not disparage homosexuality in any way, but it need not go any further.

It’s just unnecessary to make such a big deal of it.

I don't think it matters if a teacher is gay/straight or if the pupils know. I remember my youngest DS asking if eldest DD was gay or straight, I don't know what prompted his question; as we didn't know one way or the other so I just told DS it wasn't something I'd given any thought to and whichever (or bisexual) was fine and that'd be the same with teachers. People are one or the other or somewhere in between and that's OK.

I think it’s brilliant that we can do this now. Good for that teacher. Very brave. He knows that many parents watching that video would rather he kept it secret, as if it’s something to be ashamed of.
When I started teaching - only 22 years ago- we still had section 28, which stated that local authorities:
"shall not intentionally promote homosexuality or publish material with the intention of promoting homosexuality" or "promote the teaching in any maintained school of the acceptability of homosexuality as a pretended family relationship".
Thank god it’s not like that anymore (although perhaps some pp on here would prefer it was?).
And for those saying ‘well my children know it’s fine to be gay’, do you really think it’s like that for all children? Homophobia is unfortunately still common, just as racism is; many children are taught, by their parents, that being gay is something to be ashamed of.