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Original poster

Disagreements about feminism.

163 replies

californian6 · 26/05/2020 13:04

I realise that I'm probably going to be shot down for this but here we go.

I have been having some disagreements with a semi close friend about trans issues recently.
For context I grew up in West Hollywood which is the lgbtq epicentre of LA so grew up around queer and trans people all of my life while also being a bisexual woman.

Recently my friend has come up with some pretty transphobic opinions about gender and when I lightly confronted her about them she just said It was her form of feminism. Am I in the wrong for being offended or am I right?

OP posts:
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LillianBland · 26/05/2020 20:26

I know the OP is feeling like a right pollock, but eel get over it.

FloralBunting · 26/05/2020 20:22

Oooh, fish puns on the fly. Is that what's on the line here, chums? Is levity inappropriate? I wonder what would tip the scales. We could keep going to the end of thread and see if we could fillet with fishy humour. But it would only really catch the imagination if we could organize the last post as

FIN.

EmpressLangClegInChair · 26/05/2020 20:01

I bet they’ll think it’s a right load of pollocks, Lillian.

LillianBland · 26/05/2020 19:59

I think they’re going to be very disappointed with this fishing trip. 😁

EmpressLangClegInChair · 26/05/2020 19:57

It will be interesting to see which Twitter account the screenshots show up on.

LillianBland · 26/05/2020 19:53

It's not on the app yet, but is for everyone, not just premium members!

Oh, that’s good, because I’m currently broke. 😁

Cascade220 · 26/05/2020 19:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cascade220 · 26/05/2020 19:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LillianBland · 26/05/2020 19:20

Oooh new quote function

Is that only for members? 😭

SonEtLumiere · 26/05/2020 19:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RufustheLanglovingreindeer · 26/05/2020 19:18

Awesome

And what son said obvs

RufustheLanglovingreindeer · 26/05/2020 19:18

@SonEtLumiere

Is it possible that your friend was equally offended by your views? What do you think would be the best way for friends to resolve their differences on issues like this.

Obviously, because I don’t know what was said I cannot know whether her view or your’s resonates more with me. Could you expand on what was said and where you personally see the Transphobia.

Oooh new quote function
LillianBland · 26/05/2020 19:15

Oh dear. This hasn’t proven to be a successful trip.

Disagreements about feminism.
Barracker · 26/05/2020 19:07

How certain are you that you actually understood her opinions? You don't seem able to articulate them at all, so I'm not sure how you expect strangers to validate you as 'in the right'.

Also, do you mean sex, or do you mean gender?

If you aren't aware of the difference you're probably in the wrong.

SonEtLumiere · 26/05/2020 19:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ScreamingBeans · 26/05/2020 18:36

I don't think you're in the wrong for being offended. Everyone's allowed to be offended, but what do you want your friend to do about it? Your offence is your business. No one else is responsible for how you deal with your offence.

Is your friend nice in other ways? Does she listen carefully to your views and show you respect and affection? Do you have fun with her? Do you enjoy being with her? Can you cope with the idea that your friends might have different views on some subjects than those you espouse?

How old are you, you sound about 14, so I think it's unfair of other posters to tell you to discuss things with your friend like an adult.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 26/05/2020 17:37

I'm going to lightly confront OP

COME BACK AND TELL US WHAT SHE SAID!!!¡¡!!!

wrongsideofhistorymyarse · 26/05/2020 17:04

Oh what a surprise...

FloralBunting · 26/05/2020 15:29

No return yet from the OP?

wrongsideofhistorymyarse · 26/05/2020 15:28

What did she say OP?

NekoShiro · 26/05/2020 14:57

I feel like Feminism is like squash, there's tonnes of different flavours and people have their preferred strength, I don't think feminism works as a broad term anymore.

It's like old men in America telling women they can't have abortions because they don't agree with it, there's women who have never/barely had to questioned their sense of self in their lives telling other people how they're life experiences are wrong and an offense to them. Just tell you're friend what offended you and why, after that conversation it's up to you to decide if they've crossed a line you don't like, you create your boundaries.

InfiniteSheldon · 26/05/2020 14:51

Are you a woman or a transwoman?

Alonelonelyloner · 26/05/2020 14:49

Don't be offended. Or do. That's your call. You are both entitled to your viewpoint.
Feminism is about celebrating women's voices, NOT silencing them.

teawamutu · 26/05/2020 14:42

Instead of ''confronting her'' as if you are right and she is wrong, ask her to explain her reasons for her views, and have a discussion about it like an adult.

This.

Have you got the screenshots you wanted yet?

NotTerfNorCis · 26/05/2020 14:33

Hi californian6 welcome to the feminism board! I'd be up for a debate on gender if you're still around. :)

Firstly, what did you friend say that was 'transphobic about gender'?

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