'Kiss on the cheek'- a crime or sexual assault

Women tend to kiss both men and women, men kiss only women.
In my experience, it's often only an air kiss, but even so, it shows an inequality.

I think it's a real mistake to say tat just because a social custom takes a different form for men and women, it's therefor sexist.

The idea that all social touching is assault is not particularly healthy. That's not to say that people should be forced somehow to shake hands, kiss their aunt, or whatever, but like other elements of culture it's not really possible to be totally individualist about social niceties and customs.

The idea that all touch is sexual comes out of a disordered sexual landscape, but disallowing it all as sexual is not a solution, it probably makes the problem worse. I'm also not convinced that it's as simple with kids as saying they can refuse any touch they want, without some sort of discussion of why we might feel uncomfortable, what kinds of touch are normal and what their meaning is, and so on. Good boundaries is in part about being able to see what is socially normal and what isn't. If everything is the same, it can become more difficult for the child to sort out things that are problematic - it's too subjective.

It's more difficult of course when people from different backgrounds and cultures interact, not everyone has the same expectations. Personally I prefer the bise or social hug to the handshake, people's clammy hands gross me out. But I live in a mainly handshake culture.

To be honest though, we shouldn't be having to discuss the minutiae of exactly what (or if a) named crime may or may not have been committed.

Just keep your lips to yourself unless you can be certain that a kiss will be well received. Not kissing someone wont cause harm so theres no need to do it to a stranger.

I'm trying to straighten out my thoughts here.
I'm not sure why the lady being elderly means there were no sexual connotations.
I do agree that a kiss on the cheek isn't always sexual. But it most definitely can be. And when it is, there are very often only two people who know. Which of course is why they do it.

I don't think someone kissing an elderly lady on the cheek as a thank you has sexual connotations so don't see how it can be sexual assault. Kissing anyone during a pandemic is probably assault though?

I doubt I was sexual assault but it was certainly battery.

Hmm I can recall some kisses on the cheek that I found deeply unpleasant and where there was undoubtedly a sexual power dynamic at play. Of course they would have denied it and ridiculed me if I had challenged, but we both knew what was going on.

@deydododatdodontdeydodat
My point was that if he kisses women and shakes hands with men then, according to the previous poster's logic, both would be sexual assault. However, to take it a step further, he could avoid the charge by kissing a man. That's not how the law works.

@JoyceTempleSavage - yes I agree. Kissing a stranger in current circumstances is stupid and maybe illegal because of the risk of infection. Characterising it as sexual assault just confuses things.

I support all women, including those whose partners may have been accused of sexual assault after giving someone a thank you kiss.

The woman was upset enough to contact the police about what happened; and the police certainly felt it met the standards to be investigated as sexual assault

The missing link here is whether the woman reported to the police because she was unhappy at the risk of being given Covid or whether she took exception to the kiss as a sexual assault.

The woman is seventy, yeah? She reported it to the police.

Why the fuck are some people quibbling about it?

Do we support all women including the ones who are 70?

A kiss on the cheek is in no way sexual. I also don't agree that it is not acceptable in the UK - maybe 50 years ago, certainly not now.

@DidoLamenting but how do you know there was no sexual intent? Were you there?

The woman was upset enough to contact the police about what happened; and the police certainly felt it met the standards to be investigated as sexual assault. Given that they have all the information, I think it’s terribly unhelpful for people who have no idea to be splitting hairs about whether it’s a sexual assault or not, particularly with the background on social media as there are scores of comments elsewhere basically saying she’s a hysterical loon.

For example there’s a huge difference between someone getting caught up in the moment and giving someone a quick peck on the cheek; and for example blocking someone in up against their car, and refusing to let them leave until they’ve allowed a kiss. Everyone is falling over themselves to assume it’s the former when in reality we have no idea where on the spectrum the incident fell.

I'm not a fan of the French bise, anyway, and neither are some French women.
Women tend to kiss both men and women, men kiss only women.
In my experience, it's often only an air kiss, but even so, it shows an inequality.

By that logic, him shaking hands with a man would be sexual assault as he wouldn't have done it with a woman.

Men and women shake hands all the time

It's probably unlikely that he would have kissed a man but that doesn't mean it was sexual. By that logic, him shaking hands with a man would be sexual assault as he wouldn't have done it with a woman.

Maybe he did it without thinking? Like when you accidentally call the teacher 'mum' or sign off on a work call with 'love you'? I've never done this but I have hugged people I barely knew then thought 'wtf' afterwards. Hopefully they didn't think i was a predator. I'm as feminist as they come but isn't it possible it was just an 'action slip' and for a split second he treated her like his own mum? He might have been kicking himself all the way home.

Touching someone wo their consent is still touching someone wo their consent.

So someone touching your arm when you’re on a packed tube together is sexual assault?

Never heard of a kiss on the cheek being sexual. Cheek kisses are what your nan gives you. Never been kissed on the cheek by a partner.

Poor woman, no wonder she's terrified. Perhaps he just forgot, perhaps he's a prat like the supermarket shelf lickers, perhaps he doesn't believe in the virus ..whatever reason it should be assault given the pandemic.

Plus she may self isolate now leading her to lose income on top of her health risk.

Saying “it’s only a kiss on the cheek”

Has anyone said that? Posters have said it is probably not a sexual assault because of the lack of sexual intent.