Effects of corona virus on women

These stories are pissing me off. It is astonishing how the default assumption is that the woman will just sort this - figure out the education requirements, set up the schedule, keep kids entertained, do the shopping, calculate how to save/conserve food etc etc etc.

We are both WFH today. Family in self isolation today as one child riding a temp.

Yet I find myself working (very busy at mo and complex), planning y9 lessons for well child, looking after sick child and cooking, looking after house - because DH obsessed with work.

He's just locked away, dealing with his work.

He is a workaholic despite being on an average wage of £32k and regularly works til 7pm. We fall out all the time over this as my job is demanding yet I take all the load.

This is amplified now at home.

No wonder the divorce rate went up in China because this could be the nudge I need.

I have told him we will be sitting down to plan this. He said "why" My ranty reply involved the word patriarchy.

I have been shopping. DH, ha ha, followed me round singing to himself. If I asked if we needed anything I had repeat myself for him to pay attention. I eat any concoction of food. He likes things done "properly"

Oh Cracker it's so unfair isn't it. Sending a virtual (and germ free) elbow bump of solidarity. And it's so difficult to raise these issues without causing discord among both children (who will be used to you being their go to parent) and husband - and given you're going to all be at home together for a long time, who wants to do that? For some women trying to point out the inequalities could even be dangerous.

I'm getting massively pissed off that trying to book shop deliveries, plan meals to use what we have efficiently and bake bread because I'd pre-planned to ensure I had ingredients is all falling to me. Oh is glibly confident that shops will return to normal very soon so doing nothing. He's never in his life not had food so is sure he always will have enough to eat.

There is absolutely no doubt that the impacts on women are different to men. Amber Rudd (I think) was tweeting yesterday or the day before about how the CV team is all men and that women need to be involved. I couldn't agree more. They're impacted differently and also tend to be far more aware of different issues. eg Government worrying about big business, mortgages etc which is all good, but it's the women politicians who are pointing out that single mothers in rented accommodation or self employed etc are also going to need help.

Re the WHO Tweet: It would have been better maybe if instead of just "shining a spotlight" on the work women are doing, they actively encouraged men to share the load. This x 1000. I think this is the thing. To deny that women are picking up the slack is disingenuous so those suggesting that WHO and others should just thank the "people" who are picking up the slack at home are missing the point. But we NEED men and women to share this load. So employers who notice it's women's productivity going down but not men should be encouraging their male employees to share the load and/or ensuring that women aren't overly penalised for such productivity losses etc.

Reading that, I couldn't help thinking of all the women on that recent AIBU thread, denying that looking after children at home counts as "work". Suspect some of them will be finding out the hard way as the result of this....

DH and I are both WFH. We have 3 children, 2 who are online schooling with their school and a toddler.

Today, as every day, I am at the dining table working and DH is in our bedroom.

All 3 DCs gravitate towards me so I am working with them all around me, I am making snacks, supervising, making sure noses are wiped, nappies are changed etc. and he is able to work alone upstairs. If I go upstairs, they follow me because they know I am less likely to shout and more likely to be able to answer their question or meet their need.

We both work for the same company and redundancies may well be made at the end of this crisis. Looking at my productivity, there is far more chance I will lose my job than him.

There are definitely feminist issues here.

That article is a good read. Can't quite believe that there were more deaths from obstetric complications in Sierra Leone during the Ebola outbreak than from Ebola itself. I never knew that before - completely ignored by mainstream media. Shocking.

It's incredible to me watching how the childcare duties are still falling to women even now with both parents working from home. Every conference call I've had this week with women has involved them having to mute their lines while they deal with a child and this hasn't happened once with male colleagues. All of my female friends are stressing about how on earth they're going to get any work done when the schools close, it's as if they're all single parents.

I always thought my partner was quite considerate but I suggested yesterday that we put notes through the doors of the houses in our road to offer help for anyone self-isolating who can't get supplies. There are quite a few elderly people in our road. He just looked at me blankly and shrugged. I had quite a few messages from people who had seen the note thanking me for looking out for everyone, they were all from women.

I know NAMALT etc. but I really need to hear some stories of men stepping up because I personally don't know any.

Article by Helen Lewis on this subject

www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2020/03/feminism-womens-rights-coronavirus-covid19/608302/

For too long, politicians have assumed that childcare and elderly care can be “soaked up” by private citizens—mostly women—effectively providing a huge subsidy to the paid economy. This pandemic should remind us of the true scale of that distortion.

Brexit threads definitely mentioned stockpiling san pro and birth control. This has been repeated on the Pandemic threads in preppers.

crazydiamond222 and others - I’m just coming in to say I have breastfed through the flu, and a horrible stomach bug when my DD was down to waking up x2 a night (she was a terror from
3-5 months). It was perfectly doable, although obviously not ideal.

If both parents are ill at the same time then in my experience it’s actually much easier than having to make bottles etc and the general childcare bit is much harder if you feel like absolute hell.

I’m not worrying about my children catching it. It’s so contagious I don’t see how it could be avoided.

I was thinking earlier about abortion and what the implications are there. I am not sure whether abortion providers will be particularly affected (I don't know), but isolation and social distancing must result in an increase in unwanted pregnancy and a decrease in abortion, I just haven't worked through why that may be so.

Now the schools are closing I would be surprised if the pressure of juggling childcare and work doesn't disproportionately fall on mothers. Middle class professional women who can work from home will have to do so whilst simultaneously caring for the kids. Namalt, obviously, but I know from experience men will be less likely to change their own work arrangements to accommodate childcare. Women in lower skilled work, on zero hours contracts or work that can't be done from home will be the first to lose their jobs or have to give them up because of childcare.

I know Bygrab

On the shopping thread some man called his wife a "stupid bitch (or cunt)" because she missed the toilet roll being put out.

But hey, it’s not our biology that is at the root of our oppression.No.

Lots of the front-line NHS staff are female. Most nurses and a majority of younger doctors are women. And if this gets as bad as Italy, some of them will die.

What the fuck is wrong with men? NAMALT, obviously. But seriously, why would anyone do that? And the added thrill he got from scaring a pregnant woman.

Yep I've read the thread thank you.

Yep. Sinister. Poor woman.

A pregnant woman on the CV thread has started a post because a man in his 50s purposely coughed in her face.

She was sat on a bench about to eat (applied sanitiser) and he laughed and made a joke about her being scared, then coughed in her face.

There's no way he'd have done that to a man.