Men whistling loudly

Agree, if someone was standing close and whistling in my ear, it wouldn't be the whistling I'd complain about.

Notredamn

I'm not saying people are lying. If a strange man was whistling right in a pp ear as they said, then that is very strange and intrusive. But I wouldn't class that as the same thing that the op is posting about, which was men whistling in public.

For someone to be whistling right in my ear they would be leaning against me and over my shoulder. I wouldn't describe that as someone whistling in public. That is unwanted touching, invasion of personal space, or something. Not simply whistling in public, which is what the op describes.

Notredamn apologies for the hyperbole, I'm not familiar with Hearhoovesthinkzebras in other discussions but it seemed to me that they were presenting additional experiences here and only disagreeing with the limitations stated by others (e.g. only men do x). For example, if you say that the only condiment people have with chips is ketchup, I'm not calling you a liar on your ketchup experiences if I state that, due to my Dutch heritage, I know plenty of people who enjoy them with mayonnaise.

Gronky I think you misunderstood. I wasn't asking them to agree, I was asking why they assume people are lying about their experiences all the time.

The OP asked whether others saw loud public whistling as rude. It’s a behaviour seen more often in men than women. Misophonia is more common in women. I would say it’s inconsiderate at best to whistle loudly in public. When combined with other behaviours, it can be creepy.

Just take people's word for it instead of countering everything with 'but I've only seen women do it/I've only seen both sexes equally do it/how is that possible?'

' Discussion is fine as long as everyone agrees with what's being said. '

Hear why do you always assume posters are lying rather than accept that a man can be either really fucking annoying or in the wrong? Just take people's word for it instead of countering everything with 'but I've only seen women do it/I've only seen both sexes equally do it/how is that possible?' you are relentless in what you do.

But really, how does a stranger whistle right in your ear? If that is what is really happening then they must be leaning in very close to you, touching you. That's far more than just whistling isn't it? If what they were doing was standing near to you and whistling, well then that isn't whistling right in my ear. It's just whistling.

I think you cherry picked a little bit there, as with a lot of your other posts, Hearhoovesthinkzebras you missed the rest of it:
"but then he came and stood right next to me and started browsing there and whistling right in my ear!"
It's you who's decided to widen it out to now include any other creepy or intimidating behaviour that you can think of.
Because these behaviours happened in combination with the whistling. Signing off now, you seem intent to disagree at whatever cost and I've said all I wanted to say on this. Good Day!

Thisismytimetoshine No problem! It's too daft a subject to get this wound up about anyway Enjoy your day!

and we're NOT talking about male passersby whistling in the street,

And yet this is the opening sentence of the op

Does anyone else get fed up with men that whistle loudly and tunelessly in public?

So, it is precisely talking about male passers by, whistling. It's you who's decided to widen it out to now include any other creepy or intimidating behaviour that you can think of.

Ah, Upfield, of course I’m not saying it hasn’t happened to you. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.

It's nothing I'll lose sleep over, but it's not very pleasant to be told it hasn't happened. I never knew whistling would be such a contentious issue! It's quite odd that people are so divided about it, perhaps there's some subconscious triggers at play all round. I guess if you've had experiences of creepy blokes doing it that's what you will associate it with, whereas if it brings back memories of your dear old granddad doing his DIY then the opposite would be true. Maybe it's as simple as that.

Sorry about your experiences, btw. I’m not dismissing the effect of shitty male behaviour.

Just don’t assume everyone else’s experiences are the same.
What a joke! I've said a few times I accept others may not have experienced this, meanwhile I've been gaslit and told I'm imagining what's happened to me all the way through the thread!

Yes, of course you are. Just don’t assume everyone else’s experiences are the same.

But in my experience the whistling has involved inappropriate, pervy behaviour from men. Am I not allowed to mention that, then?

...PS, don't mean to be rude, it's just exasperating when you know full well what you've experienced and yet you're being told by strangers that you haven't.

Oh, give over, the op was about whistling. However many many many times you try to shoehorn unrelated stuff in.

But for the last bloody time, it's not JUST the whistling, it's in combination with other behaviours, just another tool in the creepy dude's toolbox, and we're NOT talking about male passersby whistling in the street, as has been said many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many times already.

I’m not defending creepy or overbearing behaviour in the slightest, I just don’t agree that whistling falls into that category.
I’ve encountered creepy behaviour from men, in common with most women. Still not remotely bothered by anyone choosing to whistle in the street.

You can feel oppressed by it if you choose, it doesn’t mean there’s any nasty motive attached, or indeed any motive at all that concerns you. As you haven't been present at the many different examples described on this thread, I'd say you're not really fit to judge whether or not anyone is choosing to be oppressed or if there is actually more to it and the men described are being creepy/space invading etc. To be honest I put this overbearing whistling lark down as just a minor annoyance and not something I lose any sleep over, but why are you so insistent on defending the creepy and/or overbearing behaviour of men on this and not listening to women? We're going round in circles here, it's been said many times that it's not just the whistling but other factors in combination with it - body language, proximity, comments also made, being looked up and down, being in a confined space, power relationships of the man to the woman (when they work together for example) and other behaviours going on at the same time. I can only assume so people feel very defensive about this because they are whistlers themselves!
Here's another example anyway: In school the pervy woodwork teacher/assistant sidling up to me whilst whistling, looking me up and down then making a comment about "you'll end up in trouble, you will", presumably a judgement passed because I was a working class girl who wore short skirts and had developed early, rather than being anything to do with my behaviour or grades which were always good. I still remember it now, bleurgh. I've had similar instances of a bloke standing by me whistling and then going on to make some sort of inappropriate comment, it seems like these men use it as a way into an inappropriate conversation. I will not be told by strangers on the internet that these things didn't happen or that I'm determined to be oppressed just because it hasn't happened to them.

And other people are saying whistling is nothing to do with taking up space, nor is it aimed at women who happen to be in the vicinity.
You can feel oppressed by it if you choose, it doesn’t mean there’s any nasty motive attached, or indeed any motive at all that concerns you.

That’s not what people are saying, though. They are saying it’s irritating and more likely to be done by men, because men are less likely to have been taught to be quiet and not take up space.

This is all just a matter of interpretation though.

People on trains are impatient. My god, a few weeks ago, Mile End underground at 8.30 am and we were 10 deep on the platform waiting for central line trains. Everyone of them was already rammed when it came in and it was every man and woman for themselves, people were pushing and shoving, elbows out. Both sexes doing it equally and that's normal for rush hour in London.

Same as pushing the button - I'll do that if the person in front of me is dithering. Same as at a pelican crossing - too many times I've assumed that the first person there has pushed the button, when they haven't, so now I'll push it when I get there, even of others are already waiting. Now, because I'm a woman you likely won't think anything of it but if a man were to.do.ot, for the exact reason that I'm doing it, you'd be thinking he might as well do.it with his penis or he's doing some.sort of macho button pressing display.

It's verging on paranoia to assume that anyone doing normal everyday things are doing it to get at you.