The struggles of getting a haircut as a non-binary person

isn't it the case that this person made this post on their own Twitter feed? Rather than standing outside your living room window shouting it at you or posting it on a pamphlet through your letter box?

No. It's on the BBC Social twitter feed.

So the question really is, why are you giving it such attention? And such fury

I haven't noticed any furious posts. If you think most people are commenting in fury then I think you may need to accept you don't judge tone well in text (which is not always easy).

Why are you commenting on people's comment? Why does anyone discuss anything on MN? This is a public video, produced by the state broadcaster to put forward a particular viewpoint. It's entire purpose is to generate discussion (even though it is not in a pamphlet).

Perhaps a better question would be Why do you criticise people for disagreeing rather than explaining why you think the video is right?

Has she taken testosterone? I'll be honest, I thought 'young man' when the video started, but the fingers, shoulders, and lack of Adam's apple told a different story.

I heard another poem by the same person a couple of months ago but their voice was different, higher and smoother. I'm wondering if there's a change hence my query as to why 'NB' females must sometimes make irreversible changes.

NB males don't bar clothes. Even oestrogen has less of an impact than testosterone.

Or doesnt that make you feel special enough?

@eckhart
I am just sick of the constant inconsequential self referential self aggrandising bollocks this group of people come up with. Go to a salon and ask for the haircut you want. Its not that hard

For all those saying this is attention seeking, isn't it the case that this person made this post on their own Twitter feed? Rather than standing outside your living room window shouting it at you or posting it on a pamphlet through your letter box?

So the question really is, why are you giving it such attention? And such fury, @WorriedMum6868. You sound horribly upset. What else that you personally chose to watch has incensed you today, when you could have just turned it off?

repeating what a hairdresser on MN said sometime

Some barbers might only have trained in certain techniques

Some barbers avoid women because sometimes the expectation of what they will get is at odds with what the barber can deliver. The language can be different. If you expect a wash and blow dry after the short back and sides, you will be disappointed. Or a girlie feathered version or whatever

I am vague here as I am a cut it myself person ( since my friendly barber gave up after a rent rise ) ( he did long hair but no styling, quick, limited chatter , no foul smelling stuff )

Jesus....what a narcissistic little snowflake. My dh goes to the same hairdressers that l do...l am so fed up of all this attention seeking bullshit.

My hairdressers does both men’s and women’s hair.

Indeed. Another provincial town here, at least 60% of the market must be generic hairdressers, frequented by both sexes. I only know of two barbers in the whole area.

Where does this person live that there are only highly gendered options?

Has she taken testosterone? I'll be honest, I thought 'young man' when the video started, but the fingers, shoulders, and lack of Adam's apple told a different story.

I heard a woman told in a barbers that they weren't allowed to cut women's hair for insurance reasons. Can anybody make any sense of that?

Utterly ridiculous, I'm sure she can get her haircut in plenty of places.

I go to the barber to get my haircut (well, if I don't go to the hair dressing school where it's even cheaper but slightly riskier in terms of outcome), they don't advertise as unisex but I asked if they could cut my (medium length, not a masculine style) hair and they did. Cheaper than the local hairdressers and don't have to book an appointment. But I just checked local hairdressers and they don't actually charge differently by sex but by whether it's a clipper cut or a scissor cut, which I suppose makes sense as scissors are more work than just buzzing the clippers over but when it's three times more expensive it's really taking the piss.

I don't believe for a second this person has been asked whether they're a girl or a boy by a hairdresser. That would be incredibly bad customer service. At most I'd imagine they'd ask whether they wanted a more masculine or feminine style, but would probably even skirt around that and just ask lots of questions about the style they want to make sure they've got it right - cos that's their job!

My lovely, wonderful hairdresser spends twice as much on my hair as he does SOME of the guys. I have a relatively short haircut but having a weird shaped bonce it takes a fair bit of skill to get a decent result. I've also seen him spend a lot of time and effort on a man's hair on a style that's maybe different but suits them.

That said, it's a "young" salon and they have a real cross-section of clients. Maybe the OP needs to shop around to find the environment that's most accepting (and good at what they do).

Lots of people commenting here about how the person should just get on with it without comment.

True.

What would persuade them? Changing the name to “multigender salon- if you can spell it- we can cut it”?

Everyone should send photos of their local unisex salons and the like to this person’s twitter.

I’m not sure unisex is speshul enough for they/them.

I’ve had a friend who has used barbers for 30 years. She’s not in the least feminine, but she is 100% a woman. A woman who doesn’t like over paying for a service.

The sad thing is I know someone who shared this on FB. They said it wasn’t really about hairdressers that was the thin end of the wedge. The problem is, it’s a total and utter non fucking issue.

I would say someone needs to open a gender fluid hair emporium or something. Except it would go bankrupt as no one would use it as NO ONE WOULD SEE HOW SPECIAL THEY WERE.

On the way I past one unisex hairdressers and one barbers. The barbers had a sign in the window saying ‘women’s short back and sides £8’.

Everyone should send photos of their local unisex salons and the like to this person’s twitter.

My ex MIL, who would be about 120 if still alive, always had her hair cut within a inch of its life and then permed every month or so. No gender statement for her - she just wanted her hair to be 'neat'. I suppose now she could have claimed to be somewhere on the Mermaid's scale.

However, in those days, she did what she wanted with probably one of the only parts of her life over which she had full control. (Husband would not let her go to church as he did not believe in such rubbish.)

Of course, you realize that the almost universal mockery of the utter non issue presented in this video is simply going to add to the poor wee mite's supreme persecution complex.

We'll probably get a petulant article about the terribly transphobic reaction of the internet to this plaintive plea for social justice, and it will become just another part of the rich, indefinable tapestry of oppression to prove that a law change is desperately needed to protect them.

I watched 20 seconds and my niece's Drama Llama pencil case jumped into my mind.

I also had a flashback to the early 70's in my backwards home town where a unisex hairdresser popped up. The blue rinse brigade was horrified (for a fortnight until the special offers arrived). The men refused to set foot inside until the only barber in town (at the time, now they're overrun) broke his arm and went off sick for a month.

Me? I have short hair courtesy of my local mobile hairdresser.

With the power of the internet, you'd think searching for and finding a hairdresser that will happily cut anyone's hair would be pretty simple but there you go. Drama Llama.

'JFC I feel sorry for these people. What a crap youth movement they're having.'

Trufact

Because I'm so special, I've had this amazing idea that no one has ever had before. I don't want to look like a stereotypical woman, you know, like a drag queen. This is so amazing that I must be some very special extra sex. Because every woman wants to look like a drag queen and every man wants to look like a superhero. Except me. Because I'm so special.

I couldn't stand more than twenty seconds of that silly little person. So I may have missed something of some actual importance, though my bet is not.

There are three women who cut hair at the barbers I go to, and no men who cut hair. One of these women won't cut my hair because she has only been trained to cut men's hair -- no matter that I simply want a cut just like one she would give a man. So I don't go in on Wednesdays when she is there on her own.

I asked one of the others, quietly, what that was all about, and apparently it is an actual thing: some places that train hairdressers do reckon there is a difference between men's and women's hair. She said that quite a few barbers won't cut hair for women because of this, though they don't seem able to explain what the difference actually is.

From my point of view, the real difference is that getting my hair cut the way I want it in a woman's hair salon costs thirty-odd quid minimum round here (and up beyond a ton if I go to one of the stupid places), and in the barber's costs me nine quid.

I have clearly been non-binary all my life, only I preferred to call it "maverick". It all started when I was about thirteen and liked my parents while everyone else else at my school was hating theirs, and it's only got worse since then.