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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Pronouns in my email signature

213 replies

GinTonic · 08/02/2020 08:35

I've been asked to state my personal pronouns in my work email signature. Grateful for any advice on how to deal with this? It's being presented as optional but I feel it's discriminatory as it's putting me under pressure to reveal my personal views on subjects which up to now I have not shared in the workplace. Thanks all.

OP posts:
NeverTwerkNaked · 09/02/2020 15:19

Human Rights law (right to a private life) could also be cited.

NeverTwerkNaked · 09/02/2020 15:18

@GinTonic I think the employer would be on shaky ground. I think it is fine for employees to be supported if it is something they wish to do but anything beyond that is ill advised.

Bananabixfloof · 09/02/2020 14:36

Why wouldn't you just put your preferred pronoun in? It's just makes life more welcoming and comfortable for trans and non binary ppl and causes no harm to anyone else
Ok I've done this on another thread to make a point.
My pronouns are I, me and mine.
Every time you reply to me anywhere on this site I want you to use those pronouns thanks.
Can everyone else please join in to prove this will get really old really fast.

GinTonic · 09/02/2020 13:39
  • stated not stayed
OP posts:
GinTonic · 09/02/2020 13:39

@NeverTwerkNaked what's your view on employees being "encouraged" to do this? Would you consider that potentially illegal or is it ok if stayed as optional?

OP posts:
SerendipityJane · 09/02/2020 10:27

Alternative new pronouns:

"The Manager"
"The Managing Director"
"The Owner"
"The Chief Executive Officer"
"The Chief Finance Officer"

would be a good start. Followed by:

"Your boss"
"Your manager"
"Your friend in Jesus"
and best of all
"Your Mama".

With a 10 page explanation (of each) for your union if any is rejected ....

The way to stop nonsense like this is to make it cost - big time.

TimeLady · 09/02/2020 09:16

When I've spotted preferred pronouns in a business email, it's conjured up an impression of the person concerned.

It's one thing colleagues rolling their eyes in an office - it's another when it's potential customers doing the same.

NeverTwerkNaked · 09/02/2020 09:08

I agree that GDPR means en employer shouldn't be forcing people to declare their preferred pronouns.(I am a lawyer and have run training sessions on GDPR)
Fine to allow people to if they want to. Not fine to insist people do.

Lordfrontpaw · 09/02/2020 08:13

”I think you're being rather inappropriate" or "You're making me feel uncomfortable"

Add in a couple of swears and that’s what
I can say.

StealthPolarBear · 09/02/2020 07:06

dorisdog because its a load of bollocks and I for one and sick of it.

PerkyPomPoms · 09/02/2020 02:45

I am gender neutral and therefore refuse to use gender pronouns but accept pronouns that indicate my sex as ‘female’

TeaAndStrumpets · 09/02/2020 02:27

"I think you're being rather inappropriate" or "You're making me feel uncomfortable"........Just be really fucking offended if anybody asks for your pronouns. Maybe get a migraine because they've asked, or go and sob in the loo.

BitOfFun · 09/02/2020 02:22

Why wouldn't you just put your preferred pronoun in? It's just makes life more welcoming and comfortable for trans and non binary ppl and causes no harm to anyone else.

It does, actually.

Siameasy · 09/02/2020 02:16

Lots of great ideas here. We haven’t been asked but our diversity head has them on his.
I was impressed today actually with my employer - they don’t use the word queer because of the negative connotations

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 09/02/2020 01:57

It is obedience training of the most pernicious sort. "There are four light."

midclegs · 09/02/2020 01:12

"Does it though? What if there is a trans person who hasn't "come out" yet? They've either got to make a statement and reveal they prefer to be known by the opposite pronouns, or be made to feel like they're further forced to "lie" about their identity.*"
*
That's a litigation cop-out if we need one. Added to the wtf/fgs personal pronoun choice.

OldCrone · 09/02/2020 00:54

I think it is harmful to anyone in the world who believes that their sex, is their sex irrespective of their personality.

I agree with this. We shouldn't have to believe that people have changed sex just because they prefer the stereotypes of the opposite sex. And we shouldn't have to believe that some people are sexless because they don't conform to the stereotypes for either sex.

lifeonaloop · 09/02/2020 00:47

My pronouns are wtf/ffs

BlueHarry · 09/02/2020 00:46

And also, I think it is harmful to anyone in the world who believes that their sex, is their sex irrespective of their personality. It props up the idea that gender is an innate essence. I find that very harmful.

BlueHarry · 09/02/2020 00:41

Why wouldn't you just put your preferred pronoun in? It's just makes life more welcoming and comfortable for trans and non binary ppl and causes no harm to anyone else.

Does it though? What if there is a trans person who hasn't "come out" yet? They've either got to make a statement and reveal they prefer to be known by the opposite pronouns, or be made to feel like they're further forced to "lie" about their identity.

dorisdog · 09/02/2020 00:35

Why wouldn't you just put your preferred pronoun in? It's just makes life more welcoming and comfortable for trans and non binary ppl and causes no harm to anyone else.

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 09/02/2020 00:21

I, me, and, my, are the pronouns most people use to refer to themselves. I see no need to advertise this.

NeverTwerkNaked · 09/02/2020 00:04

I think it should run more like the "my usual working days" footers you sometimes get.

So, "my usual "he/him" days are Tuesdays and Thursdays, and my usual she/her days are Wednesdays and Fridays. My usual "moody fucker" days are Mondays and its probably best not to speak to me at all on those days. Sometimes my pattern will change without notice and I will be offended if you get my pronouns wrong"

FannyCann · 08/02/2020 23:53

In fact I will probably make it my policy to correct people whichever they use just to confuse them and keep them on their toes. And when they use whichever correction I will correct them again to a different one. And if they challenge me I will claim memory problems.
Work life in the run up to retirement suddenly looks a lot more fun. GrinGrinGrin

FannyCann · 08/02/2020 23:48

After 5 minutes reflection I have decided that because I am
A. Lazy
B. Nowhere near as clever as most of the posters here
C. Not confrontational or combative
I will, if asked, definitely go with
Mrs Cann, Francesca, Fanny
That will really confuse people who don't know me well and will wonder if they should stay formal or semi formal or risk a diminutive. I won't care which they use but I will thoroughly enjoy any discomfiture and occasionally judge people according to how they address me. Grin

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