I recently came across the term in an article about how women undermine themselves by speaking in a certain way and I was curious about why we do this and what we can do to change it.
I know for a fact that I speak differently when I speak to certain people, in part to stop them interrupting and to check that they’re still listening, but also to avoid coming across as cold and unfriendly. When I have experimented with speaking in my real voice, which is deeper and flatter and less expressive, I have found that people - especially men - have responded negatively, calling me stuck-up, rude and aggressive. They seem to treat me much better when they think I am a young, weak and timid little girl.
The reason I’m thinking about this is that since having children, I’ve become more aware of how strong women are, and how the patriarchy has been set up to make us think otherwise. I am now less willing to make myself smaller to make men feel bigger. But I also don’t want to be perceived as a bitch and I don’t want all my encounters with other people to be negative.
Does anybody have any thoughts?