“I think if it's a common problem it's most likely due to the women affected being raised without a strong male role model in their household.” What a load of rot!
Unless that “strong male role model” is accompanying you everywhere what difference does that make?!
In addition many like myself that’s been the first man that WAS a threat to our safety.
“It's probably one of a huge number of problems that a rise in single parenthood is responsible for.” Odfod!
“the chances of being attacked while just innocently walking along are about the equivalent of winning the lottery, it's almost certainly not going to happen.” Again I’d love to see your stats on this
The Uk may be safER than many other countries - doesn’t mean it’s SAFE
And my mh issues are at least partly BECAUSE of my experiences with men being predators, not my mh making them so!!
“I think the vast majority women and girls have had such experiences if they honest with themselves” I agree. I’ve had real life discussions with other girls and women and on here too and ones who’ve claimed to NEVER have been harassed/assaulted when asked ‘so you’ve NEVER Been treated badly at work, had your bra strap “snapped” at school, wolf whistled, cat called, groped, grabbed, kissed without any preamble etc ever?’ Well I’ve yet to come across one who genuinely has never experienced any of that!
“It's not for anyone else to change the way they act” you really don’t think men as a class need to stop with all the derogatory, dismissive, “jokey” crap they regularly say? Stop behaving in ways that can be intimidating to women?
And I KNOW you’re going to say “I said inappropriate behaviour” but the fact is until the “low level” bad behaviour is addressed we’ll get nowhere dealing with the worse behaviour
“where they instinctively fear men for no good reason.” How Exactly is it for no good reason?!
2 women killed a week
1 in 4 women will experience dv and 1 in 5 sexual assault
And that’s this govts own stats BUT still only includes those incidents which are reported officially to police - which we KNOW the vast majority are not!
And we are nowhere NEAR true equality yet in education, healthcare, employment, housing, recreation...
“No women don't just have equality on paper, they have it in LAW” it’s not enforced much of the time though. Loopholes are exploited (eg slightly different job titles for the same job to justify paying men more, claiming other applicants had better cv’s to justify denying a job to a woman of child bearing age...)
“advances from men” please dispense with the minimising language! If it’s unwanted and uninvited it’s sexual harassment at least sexual assault at worst
“Instilling self confidence in girls and women from an early age would help greatly if this is a wider issue.” Wow! Shocking piece of victim blaming nonsense!
“The majority of men are capable of behaving perfectly well and it's not evident that men, any more than women, need to regulate their behaviour” on the contrary - statistically we know a lot of men are not behaving as well as they should.
'”men' don't need to manage their behaviour better. That's mysandry to claim that” fact is not prejudice!
“Men are more frequently the victims of violent crime because they are more likely to involve themselves criminal activities and associate with other violent men. Men are absolutely not more often the victims of violent assault by someone whilst minding their own business and being lawful.” That’s really interesting if true are there stats on this?
“Just looking at recent U.K. news stories” just that fact - that it’s rare enough to be a news story when TWO WOMEN DYING A WEEK generally ISN’T shows that it’s far less of an issue for men.
“54000 rapes in the UK in 2018” and I strongly suspect its a case of 54000 REPORTED rapes - many rapes aren’t reported. Think I saw same poster ‘correcting’ this as I’ve noted?
“I am having a problem believing that as a female you have never encountered any of the above or more, yes.....definitely. You'd be the first I'd ever met or encountered, and I've been on this earth for quite a while.” Ditto - to the point it makes me wonder if that poster is really a woman
“Drink driving was reduced mostly by making it socially unacceptable but we just don't seem to be able to do that with male violence” .l totally agree. On a similar discussion on here a poster claiming to be male argued with me that it was unreasonable to expect the decent men to challenge the not decent men when they made derogatory comments or “rape jokes” he was taking it to the level of it would put the challenger at risk of physical harm! Ridiculous and really just excuses!
I’m 47, I’ve been dealing with this shit since I was 9, from men supposed to love me and protect me to complete strangers. I can count on 1 hand the men I’ve ever met/know who as well as being decent in their own behaviour ALSO challenge men who aren’t. It’s pathetic.
Want to REALLY be a decent man? Address the behaviour of the other men around you who perpetuate and create rape culture, who are dismissive of and minimise the effects on women and girls, who scoff at yet another murderer getting off because of “rough sex gone bad” who disbelieve victims...
You’re not really a decent man in my book unless you do this.
I leave my front door wide open when I’ve a tradesman in I live in a flat it’s so I can call for help from a neighbour if need be. I’ve also avoided as far as possible for the last 17 years tradesmen being in when dd home.
I started doing this after a guy who was in my home to do my (mandatory legal requirement) gas safety check bombarded me soon after he left my home with completely uninvited very sexual which then turned aggressive texts when I rejected him. He knew I was a single mum and of course where i lived which at that time was a semi detached property in a fairly rural area. I reported him - and was literally laughed at and told I should take it as a compliment! I made it clear he was never to come to my door again. My neighbour (a lovely chap but big and imposing physically) when I mentioned to his wife said he was happy to be present for future checks and to bang on the party wall or call his name if I had any future trouble. The following year I arranged for neighbour to be with me for the safety check and the landlord/gas company sent a different guy (after almost imposing the same one on me again!)
So yes - some of us have damn good reasons for actions like this! And that also means these men are a risk to other women too and too often we don’t know until it’s too late.
Telling women that their structural fear of male violence is all in their heads is gaslighting and misogynist. hear hear!