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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Did I go too far? (Work related GC chat).

28 replies

ncGCfeminist · 22/11/2019 18:07

NC for obvious reasons.

I was at a round-table type event today at work. A v senior member from our global leadership team was there to talk about her expectations of us in our new roles.

One of the things she pointed out was that she wanted us to become "critical thinkers". She mentioned someone once quoting to her that "you should never ever believe what is printed in the news" and "possibly the only thing you can trust is information from live broadcasting (I'm assuming any format)".

Possibly without thinking this through, but knowing that I'd probably never have her ear again; with the Harry Miller and @mayaforstrater cases still running around my tiny brain, I went to speak to her in a break. I asked her about "critical thinking" and outlined a little of our GC stance, mentioned the HM case (which she hadn't heard of but asked about, I think she planned on looking it up) and asked whether or not my company would allow freedom of expression. I should say at this point that I very very much respect this woman. She replied saying that she expected respectful dialogue in the workplace and intimated that outside of work to be careful of that even more so (I think that request was fair).

I asked that if my company were to consider things such as gender neutral toilets that they consider the rights of women to have protected single sex spaces. She mentioned that gender-neutral services WOULD be coming but I am fairly sure she had taken on my point.

I am a little disappointed in myself because I wish that I had not rushed in to saying anything - because in hindsight I'm not sure I had the right language. Not worried about my job or anything (when she mentioned respectful dialogue she stated that she could see I would not do otherwise).

Sigh. Maybe a handbook of how to navigate all of this for the sole breadwinners of families would be useful?! Confused

OP posts:
TheShoesa · 22/11/2019 18:34

It is definitely gets better with practice - I was prone to rant early on when I was trying to spread the word.

The way I look at it now is that we have to take the opportunities that present themselves (which you did). If you have piqued her interest and she goes away and looks up the cases you mentioned in her own time and at her own pace, then you have alerted her to the fact that respectful dialogue often goes in one direction only. This is a good thing for her to be aware of!

I know that the emails I send won't on their own have any sort of impact. But if I can put the opposite view to the one which seems to be progressing without challenge and can give someone a moment to pause and apply some critical thinking, then I feel I have achieved something.

Gentle drip

somebrightmorning · 22/11/2019 18:16

I know exactly what you mean. You seize the moment only to find you aren't ready/carry on too long.

I think it comes down to practice.

FWRLurker · 22/11/2019 18:13

I’m also sole breadwinner and an academic so it’s hard. I keep doing things like correcting gender to sex whenever I can and making sure my students do the same on their work.

As for colleagues... may have to wait For tenure. It’s tough.

It sounds to me like you hit the right notes! Good job for speaking up I think.

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