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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Do women have the right to say they feel uncomfortable over a name?

553 replies

SarahNade · 09/11/2019 13:54

I hope this is as safe place to ask this. I am on a discussion on another thread, and it seems many think that a woman has no right to ask not to be addressed by a colloquial term, and if she does ask, she is the one being unreasonable for daring to stick her neck out, she is the one overreacting, for merely asking. Yet the male who went politely asked, gets offended that a woman dares utter her discomfort, and gets abusive with her. So why is it the woman who is 'overreacting' by merely asking not to be called something, but the man is not seen as overreacting by taking offence to her request and getting indignant?

Do women have the right to ask politely not be called something, without being told they are 'overreacting'? Or should women accept being called a term they don't like, shut up and put up with it in case she gets the male in trouble?

OP posts:
MIdgebabe · 09/11/2019 14:04

I think she told the person she didn't like being referred to and was told she was being rude

tiktok · 09/11/2019 14:00

Are you referring to things like 'darling' and 'love'? Or a version of her name she doesn;t use, like 'Sue' for 'Susan'?

Whatever it is, of course if a term is not to your liking, you can ask for it not to be used.

I mean.....choose your battles. If I'm buying vegetables and the greengrocer says "£2 please, love' I'm not going to say anything. But if a man at work continually calls me something like 'sweetheart' or whatever (unless I'm working in the theatre and the person calls everyone 'darling'!!!), then yes, I'd ask him not to. It's not very professional, and it's actually quite demeaning.

The idea that women should 'shut up' about things like this is ridiculous.

As for a name they get wrong, the same applies. 'I'm Susan, by the way, not Sue, thanks' is fine.

formerbabe · 09/11/2019 13:57

I'm honestly not sure but what if a woman calls another woman by a name such as love, babe, darling? I often do this without even thinking.

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