FFS. Scottish Census (Again)

Maybe all these new terms are caused by Sudden Onset Autocorrectosis.

SOA = Unavoidable attachment to labels that confuse victimhood with sexual orientation.
Associated with smart phone use, the labels originate in people with poor spelling skills.
Once a new spelling mistake is discovered there is an uncontrollable urge to turn it into a fetish.

More commonly known as Me Me Me Syndrome (MMMS).

I recently heard of Prince described as a Gynophile.

Good spelling is very imporrant. A scoliosexual is someone attracted to people with wonky spines, surely?

And "exclusively attracted to people with excellent SPaG skills who can really string a sentence together" better be an option, or I'll be invalidated out of existence.

Skolio even.
Even my autocorrect is confused.

I wonder how many scoliosexuals there are?
I'll have a guess... maybe 3 and they all know each other.

A quick twitter/Facebook search will probably reveal who they are.

The scoliosexuals of Scotland.

A valuable addition to the census data.

The night I met my partner I felt strongly attracted to him because he could use a sewing machine competently.

I hope that one's there, otherwise it's literal violence.

Oi!

What about us foot fetishists?

We are homosocksuals, heterosocksuals, monosocksuals and bisocksuals.

It's fair to say the entire known universe and everything in it is transphobic.

No surprises there. Everyone who isn't having sex with a transperson 100% of the time is transphobic, so far as I can tell.

'Skoliosexual is a relatively new term that refers to people who are attracted to people who are transgender or nonbinary'.

This means everyone who isn't skoliosexual is a transphobe

Twitter having fun with this today.

Below

Rodeosexual...men who think they’re a bucking bronco...and that women like that sort of stuff

I am a piesexual. I love pies

The statisticians still won't have any useful data even with all those options as nowhere on the census will it be made clear whether someone identifying as a lesbian will be at risk of conditions like prostate/ovarian cancer or not.

Gynesexual can fuck off; it deliberately groups lesbians with straight men

Quite possibly that was the intention if certain pressure groups were involved.

I'll turn a blind eye to "skoliosexual" if it means I can describe myself as askoliosexual without getting any flak for it.

Gynesexual can fuck off; it deliberately groups lesbians with straight men.

I'm sitting here fuming and half wishing you hadn't mentioned the religion question NonnyMouse.

Sectarianism is a real problem in Scotland*. I know dozens of people who have been physically assaulted for being Catholic or Protestant when they were no such thing. We are shoved into our little sectarian boxes age 5 and people make assumptions about us for the rest of our lives on that basis.

But god forbid we might waste time addressing real problems.

*I appreciate this is not true of all parts of Scotland

I wont be answering honestly, my sexual orientation is none of the government's business, and I'm read up on all this crap and am LGBTsoup and have no idea what half of that mean. The average person hasn't a chance.

But more importantly since we live in a country where political extremists with ITC backgrounds have infiltrated and regulatory captured government unchecked, and belong to groups who describe at length their interest in punishing homosexual women with rape and murder for excluding males from their bodies, I don't intend to be recorded anywhere in government databases as a lesbian.

And as I've said before, if it's ok for some people to fill this census in using their preferred choices of fact as opposed to reality then it's ok for everybody. Lets crack on. As we predicted, it'll be an expensive waste of time producing useless information that serves no practical purpose and is a criminal waste of public resources, but it might as well be interesting reading.

It is nuts.

Yes, it's infuriating.

Why does made up bullshit get preference over Sikhs having their own category?!

Good question. At the last census they didn't even have an atheist category despite 24% of the population being atheists according to the 2001 census.

And when I say atheist I'm not including the nones or agnostics, but one in four people aren't enough for their own category on the one hand, while one in several thousand must be pandered to on the other. It is nuts.

According to google, 'Skoliosexual is a relatively new term that refers to people who are attracted to people who are transgender or nonbinary'.

I thought that was pansexual?!

And why is the NRS doing this when the parliamentary committee advised against it? Who are they accountable to? Why does made up bullshit get preference over Sikhs having their own category?!