Has anybody else been followed by a random stranger?

I wonder if the well meaning in power realise what a high level of abuse women encounter out and about

Of course they know about it, they just don't care because it has no affect on men at all. It's all our own fault for simply being female. The poor men can't help it you see.

My worst was in Bodrum, Turkey. On holiday with a friend. Went out with the reps one night. Path along the bay between the beach and bars is only a couple of metres wide. I accidentally bumped into young local, early 20's who was walking in opposite direction. Said sorry etc and carried on.
Then I noticed same man again walking past me. He must've ran along the beach.
Went into a bar and when we came outside he was standing behind a tree very clearly watching me.
Went to the big nightclub at end of beach, must've been in there at least 2 hours but there he was hiding behind trees again. We started walking and as soon as we got around a natural bend in path we legged it back to hotel.
I was late 20's but looked younger and luckily didn't drink much and had my wits about me.

When I was in teens it was always creepy older weirdos who assumed I was a lot younger than my actual age. Bastards.

Yes, even the other day I was followed around Tesco (one of the really big stores) every time this guy caught my eye and kept my daze longer than appropriate I felt shivers down my spine. At first I thought I was imagining it but he kept popping up all over the place and looking at me direct in the eye it was really unpleasant.

A few years ago when out walking the dog a man followed me and asked if the dog would bite him if he touched me? 😳 He then ran off but turned up again 6ft behind me when I started walking in the other direction. The dog was very unhappy about it all and he's normally a softie. Eventually I told the man to get past or I'd let the dog off (I'd given Ddog the nudge and started moving him protectively). Man then ran off again. He clearly wasn't out running as dressed in brouges and the sweat was pouring off him when he'd tried to get up close... By contrast most men I've met when out walking the dog rurally seem to 'know' they can trigger a fear response so are all very smiley, or give a 'good morning!' in a I'm not a threat type manner.

And yet, as * just said, you find yourself being grateful it’s not worse

Yes, Loads of times.
Depending on where I am and who’s around depends on how I react. Ignore, walk away, tell them loudly to fuck off are all options I have used before.
I had someone following me around when I was 9 months pregnant, trying to get my number. An when I said I’m not interested was sworn and shouted at and told I’m ‘lucky’ he was even showing interest in me.

When I was younger a boy followed me through the park, and when I told him I wasn’t interested he spat in my face.

It makes me feel so helpless, and then I get really angry that I’m so helpless

OP I'm surprised that you would need to ask the question. I don't think I know any woman who hasn't been followed by a random violent man.

I'm so sorry for your experience - I remember when I was mugged & beaten up on the street, I caught myself thinking "Well, it wasn't too bad. At least I wasn't raped."

Dislocated thumb and temporary hearing loss from being boxed in the ears, but, at least it wasn't rape.

It's a pretty low bar.

We should all be fumingly angry, but instead we see it as a pretty standard part of ilfe and warn our daughters to be careful.

That’s a really good tip, if your being followed drive to the local fire or police station. Simple but genius!

Happened to me in my 20's. Followed from shop to shop by this man. Really creeped out. Middle aged but not white in this instance. Said hello to me and I gave him a stony stare.
Managed to give him the slip and go into a nearby building that I was attending a training course in which had a keypad entry so he couldn't follow me in. It has just occurred to me that I should have reported this to someone but didn't think of it at the time. I think I was just so relieved to have got away.
This was in a fairly big city and I felt incredibly vulnerable and alone, despite all the people around.
I got hugely hassled driving recently and a man who thought I should have let him out then tailgated me to the next town. I'd decided at that point if he continued to follow me I would drive to the fire station which is on my route home. See if he followed me in there!

I was followed home from the park a couple of months ago. I was with my DS and his friend and this creepy guy kept riding past me on his bike. I ended up practically running home and hiding behind my neighbours van so he couldn’t see which house I went into.
I’m a 40 year old, slightly over weight mum of 3, I had hoped that creepy guys would leave me alone by now.

I wonder if the well meaning in power realise what a high level of abuse women encounter out and about.

I wonder as well - there was a talk about adding misogyny to hate crimes on radio 4 months ago they had some senior policeman talk about how having men wolf whistle reported would waste everyone time .

I thought I don't know anyone who would do that - but the times I've been followed, stopped from leaving or have sexual things shouted at me just for walking down street - sometimes with my young children with me - I might consider reporting but currently aren't recorded anywhere.

I've had a few incidents.
First one I was 10/11 last year of primary school, walking home with just my cousin of the same age/year. A man followed us almost the whole way home which was a good 15 minute walk, waited until we was at the top of a bridge and asked us directions to a shop I told him, asked if it would be long and when I said no, rubbed his penis that was visibly hard and said 'oh good because I get really sore if I walk for too long' we dashed off and he followed us all the way to the top of my street and disappeared.

Has another incident when I was around the same age, not followed though, at a park with a pool with the same cousin, made friends with a girl of the same age who was with her grandad, he proceeded to change into and out of his swimming pants several times, each time flashing his bits at us, stupidly didn't tell anyone as we was worried we wouldn't be allowed to go to park alone again, really wish I had as I often wonder what his intentions were regarding his granddaughter but we was naive kids that didn't know better.

Another incident of been followed when I was 18, my friend was insisting on leaving work alone and walking to another friends house where we was, I wouldn't let her so went on my bike to walk back with her, we passed a pub and a man came out shouting at us, we ignored and walked off sharpish, the quicker we walked the quicker he did, we started running and he ran still shouting things, stop been frigid bitches, you know you want it and lots of drunk slurring. Across the road another man started shouting and running too, still don't know if he was joining in or trying to help i couldn't hear what he was saying and by this point we was very panicked and running. I managed to get on my bike and friend jumped on the back, I peddled for our life's and he stopped running after a while. I'm so glad I went to pick her up, dread to think what would have happened if she was alone!

I don't think people realise how frequently these kind of things happen to women, almost everyone I know has a story to tell of a man harrasing her.

2 stories first I was on a bus on the way home and a man came and sat next to me even though there were empty seats. When I got up to get off I was relieved I had lost him, till I realised he had waited a few minutes and followed me downstairs. Got off the bus and he was right behind me. So I stopped after the stop and he had no choice but to walk past but kept looking behind to see were I was going. I phoned my sister and had a loud conversation about the creepy guy on the bus and how I was phoning the police and he then disappeared down a side street, but I was freaked out.

Second one was on my way to work. Just came out of the coffee shop and spotted a guy stopping people on the street. Crossed the road to avoid him and he noticed and crossed to catch up with me and tried to engage me in conversation, despite my headphones being on and visible. He walked with me all the way to the office to try and get me to engage. He was homeless and wanted to get my help, was the story. I work in homelessness and directed him to the support hub, but that wouldn't do. I told him to leave me alone and he refused to leave, ended up with him shouting I was a heartless bitch at the door to my office. That one ended with a call to the police. What really freaked me out was he decided to target me because I tried to get away.

First story happened in my 30's, second one was last year and I am in my 40's now

It never bloody ends

I've never been followed on foot, but I have been followed in the car. I thought I might be, as I was going home, and thought it would be an incredible coincidence if this guy had stayed with me the full journey. So I went round in circles a few times, then went and parked at a supermarket to see if he came with me, and he did. I was terrified. He eventually drove off and I have no idea who he was or why I was followed, as I never saw him again.

At the time, I was with an abusive ex, and it crossed my mind that he had hired someone to follow me. This may still be true, I never got proof either way.

I wonder if the well meaning in power realise what a high level of abuse women encounter out and about.

This is why we are so keen to keep our women only spaces just that.

Mine was after a night out.I stupidly asked the taxi driver to drop me of on the main road round the corner from my house.It was right outside a pub.There were two men talking outside the pub and I crossed the road as they were a bit lary and I didn't want to be near them.This seemed to really anger one of the men who started following me down the road aggressively screaming at me that he wasn't going to harm me,so why did I cross the road.I was walking quickly trying to get some distance between us. Thank God his friend grabbed him and told him to leave me alone.And shouted an apology for his friend. I'll only get taxis directly to my door from now on.

Always carry a rock in your handbag to throw at creepy following cars. They usually drive off if you're threatening to cave in their window!

Yes on two occasions the first time the guy was an absolute psycho and ran after me when I started running as I got near a relatives house. As my aunt answered the door after my frantic banging he was at the end of the drive with a face of thunder on him. Luckily I got in the house before he got me I was only 15 at the time and I truly believe had I not of cottoned on he was following me and ran as I neared my aunts house then it would not of ended well.

Over 50 - and it happened to me a few weeks ago. Dark, fairly lonely high street at a late time of night, car followed me walking. I crossed over the road and walked opposite way so I wouldn't be on the same side of road. Driver did a u-turn to follow me. And another further u turns when I crossed back. It frightened me very much and I felt preyed upon.

Even worse, it was the weekend I was dropping off my 18 yr old dd for fresher's week at uni. I now worry every day for her safety.

I was also followed up the street once by two teenage boys and mugged. They pushed me to the ground and stole my handbag, I did fight back, but then stopped because it occurred to me they might have a knife. I always look round when there are footsteps behind me now, it's like a very small traumatic response. I can't not do it, even if it's broad daylight, and there are other people around.

It doesn't surprise me at all that this has happened to so many women and girls. There are a lot of predatory men around.

And yes I know NAMALT and probably perfectly innocent etc etc, but I’ve had too many shitty experiences to want to risk it, so I prioritise my own feelings of safety.

...or just stopping when someone decides to walk along just beside me.

Yes, I still do this too, when my radar goes off. Generally when a man is walking in same direction just that bit too close for comfort and internal ‘creep proximity’ alarm starts beeping.

Op what about an alarm if you're not comfortable with a pepper spray?
I would report it to the police, he should be on the supermarket and mall cctv, he could be stalking other women or known to the police.
The only time I think I was followed was in the car whilst driving. I was on my own with my young DS leaving a country park. As we drove out the exit a man driving in was staring at me, he turned his car round and then was behind me. I was about 15 minutes from home going over roundabouts and taking many turns, he was there whichever way I went. When I was nearly home he was still there and not wanting him to follow me home I took a sudden turn without indicating and he did the same. I speeded up as I knew the road had a small roundabout and I managed to get ahead and fly round it and lose him. I saw him in my mirror appearing to be looking round for me. I still wonder what he was doing and why.

Yes beginning of this year taking my kids to cinema kids are 2, 3, and 4yrs I went in to a shop near by to get sweets and drinks and noticed a man stood right by me I could clearly see he was interested in what he was looking at I grabbed stuff as quick as I cld walked round to pay n he followed me n stood there pretending to look in the fridges I grabbed kids as fast as I cld and left he followed cpl seconds later n seen he had bought litteraly nothing it scared the shit out of me cos I had 3 kids with me

I’m not sure I’ve ever been followed at a distance like this. I’m not very observant to be perfectly honest. But I’ve been followed more overtly. It’s happened quite frequently that a man sort of attaches himself to me and follows me down the street a couple of paces behind me trying to engage me in conversation. Don’t know why it always happens to me. I tend to draw an unusual amount of attention in public in general. Maybe it’s because I’m tall?

Yes, I was wondering if things had got worse or if it was just that I was noticing more. I do find myself doing things like moving away when someone sits directly opposite me on an otherwise empty train carriage, or just stopping when someone decides to walk along just beside me.