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Original poster

Abortions

233 replies

ILikeyourHairyHands · 28/09/2019 22:38

I'm not sure MN is the place for women to come for advice about abortions as so many forced-birthers or even 'I could never have an abortion" people/shills come on to every thread where a woman's in a terrible situation and is wavering.

I would advocate abortion in every circumstance a woman will be tied to an abusive man, I really hate the rhetoric that abortions are to be regretted or will cause pain. I think that the idea that abortions are or should be regretful or morally bound is very harmful to women.

Morally I agree with termination up until birth. I know that's an inflammatory position, but I think it's an humane one. And one that would be chosen by few desperate women.

But I think until the point of birth a woman must have volition in law.

OP posts:
FastAway · 29/09/2019 00:26

What do you mean not having volition?

Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/09/2019 00:25

But why should the baby be adopted? Why should the woman be seen as not having volition?

OP posts:
FastAway · 29/09/2019 00:20

Playing devils advocate slightly here.... but I have always understood the pro choice argument to be about what a woman does with her own body, that she should not be forced to carry on being a life support system to a child if she no longer wanted her body used in that way.

Obviously, at early gestations stopping that use of her body would mean that the foetus dies too, no way round it.

When you get to TOPs over 22 weeks, the best practice requires foeticide to be performed first. So let’s say the TOP performed for social reasons as 39 weeks, this would require a doctor to perform fetocide first, on a perfectly healthy baby, and then induce labour. Why not just induce labour, which removes the burden upon the woman’s body and restores her autonomy? Leaving the baby to be adopted and grasp life as best it can? Why abortion, when induction would achieve the same effect?

Caveat: I arrange TOPFAs for a living and consider myself pro choice.

Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/09/2019 00:16

Juli and any other woman that has had a premature child, I do hope the best for you, but you can't equate a wanted child at 20 weeks with a woman who is 20 weeks pregnant and does not want that child.

They are different women and different babies.

There's nothing wrong with not wanting a baby that is viable.

OP posts:
Juliephine · 29/09/2019 00:08

I agree with termination and it being a womans choice for whatever reason. No contraception is 100% accidents happen, rape happens etc.

Since having my daughter and her being in special care amongst 23 weekers that were alive and fighting every step of the way I would say that the age at which a pregnancy can be terminated needs to be reduced ie 20 weeks gestation.

It is wrong that in uk a termination in uk needs to be signed off by 2 doctors the whole process is pretty humiliating.

After having my daughter and a miscarriage personally I could not ever have another termination although it was the right decision.at the time.

It is something I have thought about over the years and i'm more at peace with it now than 10 years ago.

But it should be free and accessible to every woman. The backstreet abortions of years ago cost lives and thats not something we should go back to in a civilised world.

Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/09/2019 00:08

I advocate until birth abortions because I believe in female autonomy and I don't believe that a child has autonomy until the mother expels that child.

OP posts:
Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/09/2019 00:02

I am not making mad statements in order to vilifie women or make their choices seem unsteady.

OP posts:
Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/09/2019 00:00

I keep saying until birth because I've had five abortions from 8 to 18 weeks. I understand why women have abortions.

It should never be vilified.

I'm a very confident woman. I'm very sure about my choices. I also know that not everyone is as advantaged as me. I can see that women find themselves in
circumstances that are less than ideal. I advocate for women who find themselves in difficult circumstances.

OP posts:
sweetkitty · 28/09/2019 23:55

I’ve never had an abortion myself, I don’t think I could but I perhaps never had circumstances that other women have had.

I totally agree with abortion though, a woman’s body is her body and it is entirely her choice. Abortion should be easily accessible to all women. If you don’t agree with abortion fine don’t have one but don’t tell anyone else what they can and can’t do with their bodies.

I have a friend I’ve had to distance myself from as she posts loads of SPUC stuff on FB with photos of foetuses and emotive terms likes murder of babies and has made personal attack’s at me saying I care about animals more than dead babies (I’m vegan).

Fraggling · 28/09/2019 23:54

They have always been here. But in small numbers and shouted down.

You keep going on about abortion till birth.

This is an extreme, political view.

In real life, when abortion is available, majority are vv early.
Late term are rare. And for upsetting reasons.

You keep saying till birth. For any reason. Like, focussing on it.

Yeah. Not sure at al
l

Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 28/09/2019 23:51

Fraggling I'm not your enemy.

I am someone who is very honest. I see no shame in abortion. I see no harm in abortion. I see abortion as a good for women.

My honesty is an outlier. I know that. But, it's honest. I'm not sure how one can be more honest...

OP posts:
Coldwatershock · 28/09/2019 23:50

I'm not keen on women having to explain why they had an abortion (split condoms, couldn't take the pill...). It's your private decision, you carry the moral responsibility, you are a free adult, it's your body. I trust women to have made a necessary decision. And quite right Lang, late abortion is really hard for those women and girls, and rare. It's a personal decision and should be shame-free, surely?

Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 28/09/2019 23:47

I don't think it's full of them, but I'm seeing more and more, yes.

OP posts:
Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 28/09/2019 23:46

And I've always, morally thought if abortion is acceptable, it is acceptable at any point.

I really believe in abortion until birth.

I believe completely in women's ownership of their womb.

I ain't no shill!

OP posts:
Fraggling · 28/09/2019 23:43

Good been here for 13 years op and you think mn is full of forced birthers.

That's just bollocks.

Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 28/09/2019 23:42

I've got two Fraggling and it wasn't an option because I'm a smoker and was 36 when my youngest was born. I tried the mini-pill (as is the only allowed pill for over 30-year-old smokers), and I packed on weight like mad and felt horrible, emotionally.

OP posts:
Fraggling · 28/09/2019 23:42

Sorry that sounded arsey.

Just got alarm bells all over op.

Very few women when talking about abortion start out with, till birth. Just. Not sure.

Fraggling · 28/09/2019 23:40

While i was writing, person i was responding to posted again.

Xposts is fairly standard lingo.

sorrythisusernameisinuse · 28/09/2019 23:38

I'd like to add I opted for an abortion ad soon as I found out- at 3 weeks and it took that long to get one

Coldwatershock · 28/09/2019 23:37

Sorry fairly new here. What does 'Xposts' mean Fragg?

sorrythisusernameisinuse · 28/09/2019 23:37

I had an abortion at 8 weeks, I used a condom, it split, I used the MAP within hours, it didn't work. I had an abortion. I'm still in the same relationship we're now married actually. I don't regret it one single bit. I didn't want a child I did everybting in my power not to have a child. Even now we're still on the fence about children

Fraggling · 28/09/2019 23:36

I see.
How many children do you have?
Why was hormonal contraception not an option?

Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 28/09/2019 23:35

No! Don't be wary of me. I've been here for 13 years.

OP posts:
Original poster
ILikeyourHairyHands · 28/09/2019 23:34

I also think contraceptive choices are shit for women. Most of my unwanted pregnancies happened after my children were born and hormonal contraception was no longer an option.

OP posts:
Fraggling · 28/09/2019 23:34

Xposts with op

Still wary.