Kink shaming

Cousins isn't illegal though, which considering it's not all about genetic relation is a bit odd. It is weird that I could marry my 1st cousin who I've known since a baby, but not my step-sibling that I met when I was a teen and isn't related. Think that needs a rethink.

Honflyr where is the tabboo in step siblings ie unrelated who didn't grow up together and are of age having sex?

There isn't one.

The idea that this is what incest porn is about is laughable.

Re incest the UK (all constituent jurisdictions) has some of the most stringent laws against it.

That is a good thing in my opinion.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.thesun.co.uk/news/5562872/incest-map-of-europe-where-sex-is-legal-between-family-members/amp

Thread's already too long for me to pull out and comment on everything I wanted to. So I'm going to expand on this:

“I like to be tied up and submissive and that doesn’t make me a bad person. Don’t kink shame me!”

I can't help but see this in terms of the distinction between liberal feminism and radical feminism.

I'm not going to shame anyone for being aroused by being tied up and submissive.

I'm not going to celebrate it or view it as a good thing, or even a neutral, harmless thing either.

Because our sexual responses are largely learned. And when somebody says they get off on being tied up and submitting to whatever their partner wants to do to them, I cannot help but consider how their personal experiences within a patriarchal context have led them to this point.

I will not shame someone for having been brought to that point, by their experiences and their interaction with our culture.

But I will be critical as hell of the culture and society that have not only brought them there, but also told them that the fact that they've been brought there is normal and harmless and not hurting anybody.

I think you'll find the posts asking why you're still here and not playing out with your friend Joss are actually the ones trying to police the boards.

Yes I know, I should be more grown up, but I am procrastinating from other tasks at the moment.

What's your excuse?

I find that posts that simply aim at the poster and not the tread are just attempting to police the boards

Got a weird kink? Talk to someone if you wish. Talk to a therapist. But don’t talk to me and insist I listen without judgement. Some things are shameful and taboo for a very good reason.

I have the feeling some people don’t just want to let everyone else know about their oh-so-edgy sex life, they want and demand total acquiescence to whatever they are up to. Lest they feel judged and shamed. Poor dears.

No, its power imbalance too, but there are scenarios of step-siblings who are late teens or something and like eachother, and they wouldn't see themselves as being related in any way would they? To them they are just two teens. It's different when you're raise together. I just can't see myself considering the son of my mum's new boyfriend / eventual husband as my brother in that way. Like I never even knew my dad and if I met my half-brother he wouldn't feel like my brother despite being related.

Honflyr you are revealing yourself there. Incest is not just to do with the genetic risk on inbreeding.

step. Daddy' and step sibling porn

Yeah but that's not like real incest where you're biologically related, is it? They are only related through marriage so I don't see the issue with that in particular, obvs ages matter and whether they consider themselves real siblings or whatever.

Your comment seems to suggest that one culture should not comment on the practices of another culture even if the practice is child rape

It might be apocryphal but there is the story of a British army officer explaining that suttee might well be part of Hindu culture and tradition but British rule of law applied. British tradition was that a person who kills a person by burning them to death would find the curious British tradition of putting a noose around the neck of such a person would apply.

there are social taboos against these things again in the USA some states allow child marriage something that is a social taboo in the UK. so they are stupid right.?

Yes actually- stupid and evil. Sometimes cultural imperialism isn't actually a bad thing.

Yes you’re right. As I said at the beginning, no one would ever be kink shamed if they just STFU about their private lives.

I like to be tied up and submissive and that doesn’t make me a bad person. Don’t kink shame me

Except that is not what they are actually saying, often what they are actually saying is:

“I like to talk about my sexual proclivities in inappropriate settings, inflicting this on others who do not want to be part of the conversation, expose children to adult conversation, and ignore other’s boundaries, Don’t kink shame me!”

No-one has to be nice about your interests though. Morris dancers and trainspotters are almost universally slated. They just get on with it.

If you've got legal kinks, get on with it in private and there's no issue.

Things that should happen:

People should be able to talk openly with therapists without shame about why they are turned on by illegal acts.

Things that should not happen:

I shouldn’t be forced to listen to people complain about how they are turned on by illegal acts and people aren’t nice about it.

Why is shame bad anyway? Shame can be brilliant. Shame brings real change. When people are ashamed of their actions they can properly realise there’s a problem. People stop drinking and go to AA when the shame of their actions on their family sinks in. People lose weight when they’re ashamed they can’t walk up the stairs or keep up with their kids. As a pp has said, being publicly shamed for drink driving has been very successful. People who feel no shame whatsoever are dangerous, sociopathic. Some things people shouldn’t be shamed for and are and that’s a problem, but when they should, it can be very useful.

The problem is the cohorting together of different kinks:

“I like to be tied up and submissive and that doesn’t make me a bad person. Don’t kink shame me!”

“Yes, and I like to fantasise about rape/paedophilia/violence/wanking in my rubber suit at work at a children’s charity, I’m just like you, being kink shamed! We should fight this together!”

Er, no.

It’s known that MRA, TRA, and pedophile groups target MN because of our strong feminist/GC base. I am extremely suspicious of some of these derails.

Hence my post upthread.

Yes you are right. That's what a pint does to my brain!

The phrase kink shaming is manipulative itself. Shaming others is generally a bad thing to do so it gives the impression you are a bad person if you kink shame.

Thankfully lots of us aren't looking for acceptance amongst pornographers.

Wrong way round Redbush

Stop shaming kinks = normalisation of perverted sexual behaviour

Apparently kink shaming should be shameful

They are arguing to remove boundaries because people who aren't clear on boundaries are much easier to manipulate.