Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

"Assigned female at birth" - gender neutral baby announcements

66 replies

BlingLoving · 30/08/2019 15:52

Someone on my facebook announced birth of her and her partner's new baby (they are both women. Although I'm not sure if they identify as women or something else). Gender neutral names. In the comments, in response to a comment, she has said "[babyname] was assigned female at birth" and I just want to scream.

I'm not hugely active on these issues but I do think that saying girls have vaginas and boys have penises is a pretty uncontroversial statement personally. And it makes me sad. I love that she'll try to bring up her child to not confirm to gender stereotypes, I just don't understand why to do that the child can't be called "her/she" or be accepted as a GIRL.

Sorry. Rant over. I know a lot of you will get it.

OP posts:
HeadintheiClouds · 30/08/2019 17:30

Attention seeking loolas.

CaptainKirksSpookyghost · 30/08/2019 17:27

here's no way a modern couple didn't find out the sex from a scan well before birth

This has nothing to do with gender though.

WombOfOnesOwn · 30/08/2019 17:23

I call all the bullshit. There's no way a modern couple didn't find out the sex from a scan well before birth. Both my babies' chromosomes were tested in a blood test, as well, during early pregnancy, and more and more women have this kind of test. My baby's sex was recorded as male before we even had a 20 week scan, and if they hadn't been able to image a penis, we'd have known there was an intersex condition going on.

Pota2 · 30/08/2019 17:17

testing yeah i would be inclined to push them on it. So you think the assignment was wrong? Why didn’t you do anything about it when you registered the birth? What made you think she was female in the first place? A vagina? Surely not, what does that have to do with being female?

Pota2 · 30/08/2019 17:15

They should move to Tasmania where the birth certificate doesn’t even record sex. It’s apparently the solution to inequality. Because every time I get discriminated against, it’s because someone has first checked my passport or birth certificate to ascertain that I am female. If it wasn’t on there, how would they even know?

testing987654321 · 30/08/2019 17:15

You could ask them why they decided against assigning them as a male. Or maybe they just mean they gave birth to a girl.

Thehagonthehill · 30/08/2019 17:12

I knew after CVS that DD was a girl,she looked female when born.I don't think I thought about her gender much beyond giving her a typical girl's name.

AnyOldPrion · 30/08/2019 17:12

Surely if they felt that a mistake had been made, they could raise that when registering it?

Now, now Pota. Stop right there before you put ideas into any woke parent heads.

FamilyOfAliens · 30/08/2019 17:04

They will look back one day and cringe.

And so will their daughter.

Pota2 · 30/08/2019 17:04

pope that is true. They have decided from the day she was born that this baby is feminine, nurturing and kind. They don’t even know what her personality will be like. Very regressive.

Pota2 · 30/08/2019 17:02

Who actually does the assigning? I mean don’t parents register the birth themselves? Surely if they felt that a mistake had been made, they could raise that when registering it? Why are they so seemingly beholden to the views of one staff member at the hospital?

I think they are setting this kid up for problems by seeming almost ashamed of her biological sex. Being a woman is not the problem- it’s the way people who are women are treated by the world. By seeming to pretend she isn’t female, aren’t they saying it’s something to be ashamed of?

popehilarious · 30/08/2019 16:18

Saying they assigned an actual gender at birth doesn't sound very gender-neutral or progressive. Surely it's far more restrictive to decide a baby's gender (ie, afaict, what clothes and hobbies they will like) for them than to note their bio sex.
How unprogressive of them.

CaptainKirksSpookyghost · 30/08/2019 16:12

They must have a pretty good idea of the harm done from gender stereotypes?

You'll be surprised at how many people, when oppressed by stereotypes don't realised stereotypes exist.

Original poster
BlingLoving · 30/08/2019 16:07

Ha ha. I think it's even sadder for two women who, as far as I know ,DO identify as women and lesbians. Surely, they must have a pretty good idea of the harm done from gender stereotypes? The woman who posted is very classically and traditionally beautiful, from a very conservative background which she has spoken openly about as a negative and something that restricted her from understanding she didn't actually feel attracted to men/acknowledging her sexuality.

OP posts:
BruceAndNosh · 30/08/2019 16:05

Did they use a Hogwarts Sorting Hat?

littlbrowndog · 30/08/2019 16:02

I always think like there is an assigner bot on each maternity ward

It processes all the assignments that day.

So the bot will say. Oooook we have had 2 male assigned this morning we need to assign 2 females now
No old fashioned looking at the baby and observing. Oh no
Just state assigned

That’s how it works in our progressive times

Bewildered parents going home with their correctly assigned babies
Dam it that they though they had a wee boy