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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I made a gross and vile comment, please can someone explain why I was gross and vile?

111 replies

Mammatino · 29/08/2019 08:00

Hi, am a bit nonplussed. I've commented on a current post about the trend for vcso girls. It's young girls who are very minimal make up, beachy and save the planet types. (ish). My comment was that I thought it was a better trend than the current trend for overblown, over made up, trashy sex dolls that many young girls seem to follow. Was I vile and gross because it sounded like I was attacking a young woman's right to choose? When teens are finding an identity I would be much happier with minimum make up, planet savers, photographing sunsets than girls just highlighting (through make up and surgery) their breasts, bums and big lips. I just want to know what I've done that is gross and vile, incase it is a lack of education on my part. I've posted on feminist chat as I think it's a bit of a female identity thread and that's where I've crossed boundaries? Maybe the posters I offended like this look and I've been personal calling them trash bags (so not well thought out on my part). The thread is still active in current aibu if you want to check my context and I have posted there asking why.

OP posts:
Bezalelle · 29/08/2019 08:17

I'm actually surprised that you aren't already aware of why it was out of order, OP. People explained to you on the thread in question, repeatedly.

gorrisandhorace · 29/08/2019 08:15

I do understand where you’re coming from too Op

Twooter · 29/08/2019 08:14

What neighbour said

flapjackfairy · 29/08/2019 08:12

I agree with you as well op.

gorrisandhorace · 29/08/2019 08:12

And also because if a woman decides to wear a short skirt, heels, injected lips, boob job etc....
She’s still not "asking for it" or trying to look like a sex doll. Style can emerge from all sorts of influences. I’d hate to think if my daughter goes out dressed like a love islander (the influences she’s exposed to whether I like it or not!) then people would assume she would deserve to be assaulted or raped.

neighbourssitu · 29/08/2019 08:12

Of course everyone should be able to dress how they like but sadly society judges people.

Metempsychosis · 29/08/2019 08:12

Because (if you’re quoting yourself accurately) you were describing actual human women as “sex dolls”. If you’d said, eg, “celebrities who are made up to look more like a sex doll than a person” then you’d have been fine.

neighbourssitu · 29/08/2019 08:09

Wording could have been better but I totally understand where you're coming from and agree with you.

Mammatino · 29/08/2019 08:09

I think your right. It was my wording and I think I fucked up with that. I was definately being snarky although really genuinely unintentional. I think the look is trashy and unpleasant but that doesn't mean the person wearing it is. I really feel quite angry at myself for doing this.

OP posts:
MustardScreams · 29/08/2019 08:04

Because women can dress however they feel and however they choose to? And judging them for their looks alone, or what clothes they decide to wear IS gross and vile.

LiveInAHidingPlace · 29/08/2019 08:03

Because calling another woman trashy or a sex doll isn't really on?