Drag practice: more authentic that actually being a woman?

It's the size ten part of your comment that I take issue with. It's called sizeism

I really don't care if it is sizeism.

Perhaps FWR isn't the best forum for you, because you are going to face considerable dissent, including from eating disorder survivors for whom comments like yours may trigger a relapse, when you post comments like that.

Not my opinion obvs

For goodness sake...whats the point of me flouncing if I’m going to get it wrong

I really don't care if it is sizeism

We got that bit

And luckily im allowed my opinion that it was a mean thing to say

You could have said

Ive never met a woman who looks good in trousers....

and like the other poster i would just have thought you didnt get out much

But as i dont care about my opinion and you sure as shit dont care about mine I’ll leave it there

Your comment was pretty below the belt Marguerita. I don’t give a shit if it annoyed you that someone prefers trousers to skirts, saying that only thin women look good in certain things is not on. Especially in a feminist forum. Don’t like it on yourself? Fine. But don’t drag down the majority of the female population with you.

It's the size ten part of your comment that I take issue with. It's called sizeism

I really don't care if it is sizeism.

You werent body shamed

Nothing was said about what size you should be to look good in a dress

I didn't say I was. What I said was I'm not going to cry body shaming because of the idiotic comment about all women look better in trousers.

I'm also entitled to my opinion on large areas not looking good in trousers. If that's "body shaming" - tough. I don't like thought policing.

MargueritaBlue

It's the size ten part of your comment that I take issue with. It's called sizeism.

I can't disagree with the poster who said all women she's seen to date look better in trousers, because I haven't seen all the women she's seen. She might simply have never yet seen a woman who she thinks looks better in a skirt. She might see one tomorrow! You never know. Also, her opinion didn't come with an attitude of "anyone size twelve or bigger is too fat for certain clothes".

No. I was replying to you. Because you seemed to be saying that the only consideration in choosing what clothes to wear was how they looked on you. A fat-arsed (size 12) woman like me might choose to wear trousers just because they're practical, even if I looked more decorative in a skirt

But you are happy to let the nonsense that all women look better in trousers and the sexist nonsense that men look great in skirts stand? Why aren't you challenging those comments?

And what , btw, is so weird about choosing clothes on the basis of what they will look like on me? I didn't say it was the only consideration but I'm certainly not going to choose clothes which are ugly or unflattering just because they are comfortable.

m not however going to cry in a corner that I was "body shamed

You werent body shamed

Nothing was said about what size you should be to look good in a dress

I would also argue that the care assistant wearing trousers and flats to work as she looks after terminally-ill cancer patients is much more feminine than the AGP software developer in dress and heels who doesn't give a shiny shit about anyone other than h**self.

No thanks for the body shaming

Oh the drama This has nothing to do with work wear. You were presumably happy to to let the nonsensical comment about all women look better in trousers stand? That was dim and untrue. I'm not however going to cry in a corner that I was "body shamed"

Body shaming is so overly dramatic. In my opinion very few women look good in trousers, no matter how comfortable or practical they might be.

They [trousers] are very unflattering on anyone larger than a size 10.

More or less flattering than me flashing my knickers and ripping my tights as I crawl under lab benches to deal with equipment?

Some of us wear trousers because wearing skirts is a stupid idea in our work or hobbies. Some of us wear trousers to have the option of thermal leggings when the weather turns cold.

No thanks for the body shaming.

Twenty Transwomen Who Make Your Girlfriend Look Like A Dude. What do y'all think?

Wow, with hundreds of thousands of pounds worth of surgery, more make up than Kim K, strategic posing and a bucket load of photo shop - a small percentage of men can almost pass as women.

Twenty Transwomen Who Make Your Girlfriend Look Like A Dude

It's all a bit desperately competitive isn't it? "TW are hotter-looking than your girlfriend so why don't you want to date us - waaah?" is what I'm taking away from that.

As for me, I don't think men make women look like dudes. Full stop.

I agree that drag is offensive. Here is another example of something I find offensive: Twenty Transwomen Who Make Your Girlfriend Look Like A Dude. What do y'all think? scribol.com/pop-culture/celebrities/beautiful-transgender-women/

OldCrone fair enough. I was thinking of when it's used on here as part of normal discourse - not in the heat of the moment. So bad example.

I’ve always been somewhat GNC and as an adolescent I thought this meant that I was hideous and no one would ever love me because I was given the impression by media and society more widely that men were attracted to the trappings of femininity.

Eventually, though, I realized the following - and it’s had a huge impact on my philosophy of life and feelings about gender. Straight men are attracted to female bodies. Not to femininity.

Now, why is culture so obsessed with femininity, given none of it is natural? Well Some straight men more than others care about what other people think about their partners. For example a lot of guys who are into larger female bodies keep their girlfriends secret because they are ashamed. I have found that Being Relatively GNC is a great way to filter out people who want to use you as a status symbol. Smaller but higher quality dating pool. There are of course other ways to apply a filter but I imagine more discernment is needed.

At dh dinner dance they told women to wear red or White evening dresses

So i wore black leggings and a black sleeveless top with a black leather jacket

I am feminine...but I’m not being told what to wear to prove it

And in the dress shop i worked in for a long time the rule was you should preferably be in a dress but could wear jeans if you wore high heels...didnt do that either

I look great in jeans and trousers

Mainly because i am very thick waisted

Pretty Dresses look dreadful cos im big of boob and thick of waist

Lots of my friends look stunning in dresses and trousers...whatever size they are

But then im not fucking likely to come on here and say

All women this or all women that

As that would be daft

I reject women being told they must perform femininity, in the form of heels, makeup, taking on the caring roles etc, just because they're women

Yup

Are you referring to the poster who thinks all women look better in trousers? That certainly seems a rather obsessional and narrow attitude.

No. I was replying to you. Because you seemed to be saying that the only consideration in choosing what clothes to wear was how they looked on you. A fat-arsed (size 12) woman like me might choose to wear trousers just because they're practical, even if I looked more decorative in a skirt.

And there's my point, thank you. That sentiment could have been expressed in a neutral way, e.g. 'some of us don't care how we look'. There was no need for the derogatory wording.

But that would change the meaning. 'Some of us don't care how we look' doesn't mean the same as 'some of us are not obsessed about how we look'. You can care about your appearance without worrying that a whole category of clothing is 'unflattering' so you shouldn't go near it even if it's the most appropriate/practical type of clothing for whatever you're doing.

If I'm going to a formal event I care whether I am wearing clothing which is appropriate for the event and looks smart, so I do care about how I look. I don't obsess about whether my trousers make my bum look a bit big (or whatever Marguerita was getting at with her 'If you're not skinny you shouldn't wear trousers' comment). She was the one making derogatory comments, not me.

Some of us aren't obsessed about the way we look and go for comfort and practicality. I'd look pretty daft riding my motorbike in a skirt

Are you referring to the poster who thinks all women look better in trousers? That certainly seems a rather obsessional and narrow attitude.

Margueritaokay but it’s not very nice to basically slate anyone who is bigger than a size 10 just to prove some dumb point

Why are you lecturing me rather than the poster who made the sweeping and nonsensical post about all women looking better in trousers? - which was followed up btw by the sexist comment about men in skirts ( ie kilts being fine)