Remember that grey hair is rarely attractive

The thing I find interesting is the assumption that women should care if they're attractive. Why? I don't. There is exactly, in the entire world, only one person (DH) that I want to be attracted to me. I don't care about the rest and frankly I'd rather other people weren't attracted to me (thankfully 2 children and middle age and indeed grey hair has helped on this score).

I would like people to think I look presentable, but that is an entirely different thing. I actually think grey hair can actually create quite a favourable impression of age and wisdom (maybe kidding myself on the last one though :) )

Unsurprisingly it's a company that sells hair dye.

Ha! Imagine that... Manufacturing and exploiting people's insecurities for profit.

It's all about making money. If hairdressers and hair product companies told us all we all looked great with natural, unstyled hair, they wouldn't have a business. So they manufacture insecurity if we don't have it already, in order to sell us things we don't actually need.

Having said that I started going grey quite young and don't really like how it looks one me so I get my hair dyed, also so that the texture matches my natural hair (I do think it looks great on some women, but they are usually about 30 years older than me and are completely grey).

I read this thread as saying:

Remember that grey hair is really attractive

And I was thinking 'Thanks! Yeah I reckon it is too

I think women with grey hair look younger when they don't dye it.

I've been going grey since I was 14.
20 years later I'm ready, and more confident, partly thanks to this board, to embrace myself as a I am and do away with expensive, time consuming, messy and environmentally unfriendly chores just to pander to societies, especially men's expectations.
I like my hair, I like myself as I am and I'm proud of myself for getting to that point in life against all the shitty messaging we receive everyday, telling us we're not good enough, after years of battling eating disorders and self loathing.
I also get a perverse thrill from completely confusing people and their expectations because my face looks 25, I'm tiny and immature but my hair is about 50% grey.

I once had a girlfriend say to me - "Are you going to dye your hair black, after it turns ginger/grey after turning grey?"
She didn't really like my ginger hair.
Didn't last long after that.

Not just saying this but I think women who have grey hair often (not always) look better than women who dye it. Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada!

I’m 46 and no grey hair yet. Not all of us dye our hair.

Who is this person and why should women give a shit about what he says?

Unsurprisingly it's a company that sells hair dye.

My DH asked me why I wasn’t going full grey like my SIL, who looked great with pepper and salt, looked chic with her steel grey bob and now looks amazing with her white hair pixie crop, along with her expensive flowing linen.

I had dark brown hair, which I loved, went very unevenly grey ( think badger) so decided to follow my mother in going for highlights then full blonde. I am enjoying this new view of myself, know that grey isn’t going to look chic with my hair type, will do this until it becomes too much effort/does not suit me .

Incidentally, OP, maybe you're right to be wary of AIBU, but I've seen threads (maybe on S&B) about women who are choosing to go grey - there's quite a few who are avoiding growing out dye by getting very short cuts and going from there, with lots of mutual encouragement.

“The last thing I’d want is to go back to the relentless fucking hassle and actual fear I experienced in my 20s when men, apparently, did find me attractive”

So much this! When I was younger, a woman at work told me how upset I’d be when this happened. I told her I was looking forward to it, she said you’re deluded.

Well I’m here now, and it’s great!

I'm in the process of growing my grey hair out at the age of 33.
Funnily enough I don't actually give a shit if this guy or any other guy finds my natural hair attractive or not.
As it happens my lover thinks it's 'sexy' which is good for him because I don't sleep with shallow men who pass negative comment on my appearance, or expect me to waste money and my precious time doing things I don't value for the sake of their egos.

I'm grey with very pale skin and brown eyes. I'm gorgeous 😄

Im 47 and i stopped highlighting my hair approx 10 years ago when i had a baby and toddler and couldn't spare the 5 hours in a salon i needed for a colour and cut. The time was the issue but i also realise the money was ridiculous too. I was very disappointed when my hair grew out at the lack of grey!

I want a full head of it, but i just have some weasily bits at my ears!

What about hair like a badger's arse? Has Daniel pronounced on this. Asking for a friend...

Soon to be 60 I’m almost 62 and have never felt so good.

Soontobe60

You sound gorgeous!

Stop putting chemicals in your hair to dye it. It's not beneficial to your hair health or the environment.

Grey hair rocks! I love the colour grey, it is essential to use in paintings.

Men, by the way, are adored for being a silver fox - trust me I just don't get women who say this and they are usually younger and have dyed hair.

I clicked on this thinking it would be one of those threads about a sexist advice book or magazine article from the 1890s that somebody has found!

Daniel Field, for example, is a...

That’s me buggered then! Grey hair, shoulder length beach waves, green eyes, freckled face with very little make up AND soon to be 60!
Do I only go out in public with a bag over my head??!

Who is this person and why should women give a shit about what he says?

I'm 35 and already have lots of grey strands. My mum and some high school friends tend to panic for my sake when they see my hair, but I'm not really fussed. Didn't seem to bother the men I went on dates with and doesn't get in the way of my relationship with my partner.

I'd like to experiment with blue and green colours, but since I have dark hair, I'll wait until I have more of the white / grey ones.
I've thought of using natural dyes like henna with indigo, but that's more out of curiosity to see what sort of shades appear once it's washed off and whether the natural product will condition and strengthen my hair. However, the whole process seems so tedious that I haven't bothered so far.

Sexist, racist, ageist all at once!

Daniel is clearly a nasty little man that can go crawl back to where he came from.

It leaves a grubby feeling when anyone tries to impose their notions of attractiveness as somehow a golden standard of taste.