Engagement rings

We both had a ring. My ring was cheaper than DH,'s, in fact my ring only cost £95 - then another £70 5 years later to replace the stone that fell out,

I couldn't ware something worth lots of money and even if rich I couldn't imagine spending to much money on jewellery.

It's didn't feel like ownership or anything snd as I say we both got engagement and wedding rings.

My mum gave my DH her engagement ring to give to me, its a tradition to pass it down the female lineage. It just so happened that it was the perfect ruby ring that I had adored since I was young. We purchased our wedding rings together, they were identical with both our birth stones in each one. Now DH wants to buy a ring so that the one passed down from mum can be stored safely and I love that he has designed the ring himself and chosen the stones personally too. I have bought him a bracelet as I know he always wanted one.

DH and I both had them. Both wanted a visible symbol. I don't know that I'd have liked to wear one otherwise.

I've been a Ms since sixth form. I also felt miss has child-like connotations.

I have had people ask if I'm divorced though (from late teens), or claim Ms is really hard to say.

My issue really with 'Mrs' is that it creates a division between married and unmarried women. Sometimes it is almost like a badge of honour - i'm good enough to marry , and I don't like that.

I've always used Ms - single or married. Ms has its own connotations, though.

I don't use Mrs - so annoying to tell someone your marital status before your name!

b) it looked exactly like an amethyst, except it cost 10 times as much

Sapphires are a lot more durable than amethysts so it'll last you forever (possibly slightly unfortunate given how you feel about it).

I’m on my third husband (consecutive, not concurrent) and I’ve never had an engagement ring (nor walked down an aisle, nor worn a wedding dress. All my outfits were fabulous though).

I do wear a wedding ring (so does H) but it’s very plain and classic - I’m a theatrical dresser so it goes with everything.

He will never know any of this!

I hope he's not on here- you've told us 5 times !
( I didn't know about purple sapphires. Platinum and white gold puzzle me- how do you tell from looking at them that it isn't silver? I have a platinum brooch ; it's lovely but I wouldn't know if I hadn't been told)

Dm (an ardent feminist) was horrified by my engagement ring. I was insistent that it would not be a diamond, because ethics aside they are a massive rip off, and I fully understand the ownership factor, and was a bit uncomfortable with it. I found that aspect was actually the best part. Although it means playing along with the "no means yes unless she's taken" trope, it was like a magical shield against the onslaught of unwanted attention (not a stealth boast, I am no Helen of Troy). It also meant I could be friendly to a man without him wondering if I wanted to shag him. I did feel less unbalanced once we married and DH got his shield too.

I did stay firm on not being a Mrs, keeping my name and giving it to my children. I say firm. DH understood that it wasn't his place to decide on my name or title.

I don’t see my engagement ring as a sign of ownership I see it as a sign of love, my ring is a simple solitaire, it’s not huge or expensive but I still love it. Dh surprised me with proposing and had spoken to my mum and bought the ring without me knowing. We were young when we got engaged and married and I still love my ring now 20 year s later.

Each to their own , some people were rings others don’t. Do what makes you happy and never mind what other do.

First Google result but have read this story lots

blog.hubspot.com/marketing/diamond-de-beers-marketing-campaign

It was de beers wasn't it who popularised it and made it about diamonds, not even so long ago

I think amongst the working class this is a relatively new thing- my Nan certainly never had an engagement ring, they didn’t have enough money for that! I don’t have one, but I’d been engaged before with the full bells and whistles proposal and a huge diamond so was actively massively against it. It is an odd tradition and has no place in this century really.

We both had one, he proposed with a ring for me and then we went out shopping to get him a band. I don’t see it as male possession though, I think it’s everybody's choice what they want to do.

I felt very strongly against this because of the history of it being used as a display of male ownership with a side dish of big ol' capitalist dick-swing.

Also the history of diamonds being artificially driven up in price to drive the engagement ring market and the ethics of diamonds in itself.

I feel like, even if people don't see it as thr above, it perpetuates the structure just like taking a man's name. I understand I'm at the sharp end here though.

I think it very much depends on the relationship - I've certainly met both men and women who view it almost as a deposit, the ones that tell you how much it cost, or how big the diamond is.

Then there's the others who just bought something out of love - Argos or a second hand shop, just what they could afford, that was beautiful, as a symbol of a promise instead.

Personally I don't have either, and no particular plan to get married, although we might soon, just to simplify issues should either of us die. We won't bother with rings though - neither of us are into jewellry, and our commitment to each other is in the form of joint property purchase and 2 kids.

Degloving I know about cos ex was a biker, can happen if you come off with no go gloves on.

I don't think it's that common tbh that the population should stop wearing jewellery

Is horrific idea obv

I've never even heard of de-gloving before...

How common is degloving? Google suggests around 150,000 cases annually reported in the US leading to amputation. The population of the USA is 327.2 million.