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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Lesbian vs. A Lesbian.

36 replies

ClaudiaWankleman · 15/07/2019 12:19

I just caught myself using the words ‘gay’ and ‘lesbian’ differently.

Usage being ‘he is gay, and she is a lesbian’. Ie adjective versus noun.

I wouldn’t ever say ‘he is a gay’, as it sounds wrong and slightly offensive.

Should I be making the effort to use lesbian as an adjective too? My thoughts are that 1) the act of using the two words differently is in itself unequal (especially as they are really just gendered terms for homosexual), and 2) lesbian is just one facet of a person and the adjective form seems to encompass this better than the noun.

On the other hand, lesbian women may see being lesbian as a prominent and important part of their identity and therefore not mind?

Am I overthinking this? Is my use of language sub optimal here?

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Goosefoot · 16/07/2019 00:06

Anyone I have heard use the term "a gay" was rural and usually older. It wasn't pejorative, just folksy.

NeverSayFreelance · 15/07/2019 23:28

They are all technically fine.

He's gay; she's lesbian.

He's a gay; she's a lesbian.

"A gay" is just less common, but my gay friends do use it.

chillz · 15/07/2019 23:26

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joystir59 · 15/07/2019 22:40

There is no 'bi' in Lesbian. The word means inhabitant of Lesvos, not Lesbos. There is no letter b in Greek.

Birdsfoottrefoil · 15/07/2019 22:28

My df is rather behind the times, so if he called you a gay women what he would still mean fun, happy, cheerful, carefree...

Whatisthisfuckery · 15/07/2019 22:22

I’m fine with either tbh although interesting point. I absolutely despise being called a gay woman. I used it as a bit of a comfort blanket when I was coming out because I was still struggling with the idea of being (a) lesbian, but now I defend my lesbianity fiercely.

Goosefoot · 15/07/2019 22:21

I would add to this that we should also drop the word 'hamster' because our brains snag on the 'ham' part and rodents are not traditionally made of cured pig meats.

Hamsters have hams though. You could cure them.

Icantreachthepretzels · 15/07/2019 22:16

'Female' as an English word is from the old French word 'femelle' which itself came from the latin 'femella'.
'Male' comes from old french masle, latin masculus.
Completely different root words.
But people's minds like to make connections - even if they're not there.

so 'melle' ending becoming 'male' is essentially the same as when we imported those nice new naranjas from Spain, angicised them to a norange and then misheard - because of their colour - and assumed they must be an orange

Seems like chillz just has a problem with all words about women.

Yeahnahyeah · 15/07/2019 22:06

*The thought system which creates patriarchy creates our words also. Using the holograohic concept, that distorting and deviance would be evidence in all systems including the creation of words.

The word Therapist contains The rapist for example*

What bollocks.
New Latin therapia, from Greek therapeia, from therapeuein, to treat medically.

Icantreachthepretzels · 15/07/2019 22:06

Women and female - I would put the emphasis on the first syllable. And the 'men' part of 'women' is pronounced more like 'min'
Lay dee - no mention of a lad.
lesbee -an - no mention of bye sexuals or male inclusion

If you are not trolling, then your posts are ridiculous.

Weezol · 15/07/2019 22:06

Maybe it is for linguists, but not for the average bear.

chillz · 15/07/2019 22:01

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Icantreachthepretzels · 15/07/2019 21:55

I think we should drop Lesbian, because it is a word to describe female homosexuals but it contains the word 'bi' which is attraction to men and women. Les-bi-an.

I would add to this that we should also drop the word 'hamster' because our brains snag on the 'ham' part and rodents are not traditionally made of cured pig meats.

chillz · 15/07/2019 21:54

Is there a way to edit posts once published? Typos...

chillz · 15/07/2019 21:50

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lazylinguist · 15/07/2019 21:49

Incidentally, I think the fact that lesbian sounds right when used as both a noun and adjective is more to do with the structure of the word itself, and its -an ending, typical of words denoting place of origin (e.g. Lesbos). Like American, German, Italian etc, which can all be used as both nouns and adjectives, unlike French or English, for example).

bettybeans · 15/07/2019 21:48

Has anyone told the Gambians, Serbians, Arabians and amphibians? Chances are they'll want to know about this.

lazylinguist · 15/07/2019 21:45

My mind doesn't snag on the 'bi', especially as it's pronounced 'bee', not 'by'. Are Colombians bisexual too? Grin

chillz · 15/07/2019 21:42

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joystir59 · 15/07/2019 20:51

I came out as a lesbian; owning it was a challenging thing to do and be. I'm not interested in being renamed thanks. Especially in this era of lesbian erasure.

FloralBunting · 15/07/2019 19:11

SomeDyke, that's so true!! Sapphic has definite pretensions. Possibly because whenever I've heard it used it was only with mild, indulgent disapproval by the upper classes in period dramas. There's a touch of the Downtons about it.

chillz is taking the p, surely?

Bezalelle · 15/07/2019 18:45

Are you serious, Chillz? You know it comes from "Lesbos", right? The "bi" part has nothing to do with bisexuality.

chillz · 15/07/2019 18:25

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SomeDyke · 15/07/2019 18:07

If you're poor,
then you're a dyke.
If you're rich,
you're sapphic,
but if you're neither one nor the other,
a lesbian, a lesbian is what you'll have to be...........

Eleanor Hakim, from Monique Wittig and Sande Zeig, 'Lesbian Peoples, materials for a dictionary'........which is WHY it took me so long to find, the Monique Wittig stuff being rather obscure, and rather hard to understand even when you have found it!

Goosefoot · 15/07/2019 18:04

I wonder if gay gets used without an article because it's a kind of holdover from the older meaning? As in, "he is happy and gay."