Domestic Violence ‘ not a gender thing’

It's not a clear cut issue though. Despite men being the main perpetrators of VAW, women are increasingly becoming a threat to children.

70% of children murdered by a parent are murdered by their mother, and sexual abuse of minors by a female has tripled in the last decade. The judge who was ruling on the case of that woman (forget her name) who rang a paedophile ring up north said it was 'the most harrowing case he'd ever seen.'

There is literally complete radio silence on these issues it seems, and you'd expect at least a bit of discussion.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_violence#Gender_differences

Check out some of the wiki entries.

" A 2012 review from the journal Psychology of Violence found that women suffered disproportionately as a result of intimate partner violence, especially in terms of injuries, fear, and posttraumatic stress disorder.[167] The review also found that 70% of female victims in one study were "very frightened" in response to IPV from their partners, but 85% of male victims reported "no fear", and that IPV mediated the satisfaction of the relationship for women but not for men.[167] Hamberger's (2005) review found that men tend to respond to female partner-initiated IPV with laughter and amusement.[168]"

and
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_violence_against_men#Gender_symmetry

The perpetrators of sustained, injurious abuse are overwhelmingly likely to be men. Some studies put that on parity with a woman slapping her partner, or throwing an object at them during an argument or even in self defence - or even verbal abuse. Although lashing out is not good its not really the same as coersive and controlling violence.

Of course there are some cases of violent sustained abuse by women (there was a doc about an awful case on iplayer recently). But it seems to be relatively rare.

For UK figures on domestic violence, the ONS also includes familial violence ie children to parents and vice versa. A large proportion of male victim figures come from this if you dig into the data.

I was surprised to read the other day that 70% of parents who murder their children are female, and that the victim is male in circa 60% of cases. That would certainly support the above.

I am totally uniformed about sport so wasn't aware of this comment.

So apart from wanting to say it has nothing to do with gender, it is about sex based violence, what difference does it make to whether it is suitable to have a member of a national team who is a known perpetrator of violence. Saying women do it too, doesn't make it okay.

Seriously.

Also, re the prevailing notion that men and women equally suffer DV, I have found these stats from the Government which I am confused by but maybe somebody could explain.

Interesting that they say they are experimental statistics which sorts of implies they haven't recorded DV offences by sex??

See figures 5 & 6 www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/crimeandjustice/bulletins/domesticabuseinenglandandwales/yearendingmarch2018#domestic-abuse-recorded-by-the-police

In my circles I know a couple of women who've lift abusive (financial, aggressive) relationships. I only know one person who left because of physical violence and abuse a bloke.

DV is a 'gender thing' when you look at the statistics. That is not to say that women never commit DV but when you break it down there is an imbalance. Hansen doesn't get down to the details though, funnily enough, just makes sweeping statements. Even if males and females did commit it at the same rates, with the same types of incident, that would still be totally irrelevant to whether he wanted to call up a man with a conviction for violence against his partner.

And if he does think that Reece is worthy of forgiveness and a place on the team, then he should fucking well own that and say that, rather than start spouting irrelevant 'wimmin do it too' shite.

Saying it’s not just men that commit it doesn’t deflect attention away from the fact that this specific player did though and obviously that needs to be addressed properly.

I’m just responding to the title and going by the article linked in which he says that NZ has a DV problem and his experience in the police shows it’s not just limited to male on female violence.

The coach seemed to be saying it wasn’t limited to men, which I agree wasn’t entirely relevant in the context of what had happened but perhaps as an ex- police officer his motives were more to raise awareness in general rather than the specific incident.

😂😂😂

Yes, that will be it. Nothing at all to do with trying to deflect attention away from the fact that he is perfectly happy to have a horrible abusive violent man on his team, simply because that man is good at rugby.

Give me fucking strength.

@JessicaWakefieldSV

I have no disagreement with what you say. I simply always feel compelled to point out that minorities matter, whoever they are and whatever sex they are. :)

Re Polynesian culture; I am very sorry to hear that this is the case, however I think that DV does happen more in oppressed and disempowered communities where people suffer from more emotional stress and trauma, racism and other isms.

My entire extended whanau did absolutely nothing despite knowing 4 little kids and a woman were being horribly abused.

I am so very sorry to hear this.

I am white and my family suffered sexual and violent abuse that was covered up then and continues to be covered up to this day.

I think that for ethnic minorities, especially those that suffer the multi-generation effects of colonialism, racism and other isms these abuses are more likely to be covered up because they feed into the racist stereotypes of ethnic minorities being somehow "savage" and even inhuman.

It is just another way in which racism and colonialism makes the lives of minorities even harder.

The coach seemed to be saying it wasn’t limited to men, which I agree wasn’t entirely relevant in the context of what had happened but perhaps as an ex- police officer his motives were more to raise awareness in general rather than the specific incident.

I don’t think people talk about all forms of DV enough. It is mostly limited to Male on female discussions, which makes sense since woman are the biggest victims but it does affect our perception as a society on what an abuse victim should ‘look like’ which is also dangerous.

This is interesting for anyone curious on the subject of how we see male and female abuse victims differently (may be triggering perhaps? - shows ‘Domestic abuse’) :

m.youtube.com/watch?v=GccCWo_eZdw

I was speaking to a friend who helped establish a DV support centre and he told me that one thing they had not expected was the level of male victims of DV.

It was 11%

So yes, women are statistically more at risk of DV, but males are victims too and also some women are perpetrators, as I know from 1st hand experience of relationships with violent female partners.

It's not a competition though is it? The priority should be to protect victims and to bring perpetrators to justice regardless of their sex

I hope that one works. As he says, women suffer more from DV than men. Perhaps when the male rate of death from DV equals the female rate, and is perpetrated by women on men, not men on men, we can accept that they are equal but until then let us accept that women suffer more.

pdfs.semanticscholar.org/32c8/6f957e196434edb1c80cba5f27429c930978.pdf