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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

"cis women need to put on their big dick panties and try harder."

59 replies

AnduinsGirl · 20/06/2019 18:21

Fucking hell. I belong to a child-free group on Fb. Fairly good craic even though I don't agree with some stuff on there. Majority in the group probably women in their early 20's. Someone asked yesterday what people thought about Trans woman competing in women's sports and ohhhh my god. The number of women sabotaging themselves with comments such as the one in my title. Wtf is going on? :( I know you'll find uber-wokes in all corners of the internet but God it makes me sad. How are some women so utterly gullible? Apologies - nothing new to add to the debate, I'm much more a reader than a poster but I feel very deflated right now.

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DanaPhoenix · 22/06/2019 12:50

Yes the word panties has already creeped me out.
In my circles it tends to be undies, sometimes knickers or if you want to go the bogan blokey route, reg grundies = undies.
A completely Aussie shoutout to our British roots of rhyming slang.

Oh and I’m case anyone is interested in the result of the game I was discussing up thread. YAY blues (NSW) won 14-4 after being down 4-0 at halftime. Something I might point out that is difficult for their male counterparts to achieve at this level.

RuffleCrow · 21/06/2019 17:16

Seeing as there's no such thing as a cis-woman i just tend to ignore these daft comments.

I think Wittgenstein was very interested in these sorts of statements that have grammatical form but no content.

LimitIsUp · 21/06/2019 17:11

Did you manage to get through to them at all op?

carla1983 · 21/06/2019 15:50

"Do young women not experience the relentless sexual harassment I got when I was younger? I'm sure they do. I've always been a feminist so I don't remember a time when I thought this was okay, how can women not notice"

"Subconsciously they’ll probably think it’s their fault."

Yes, I experienced harassment as a young woman but I never really thought it through and why it happened. And it was only when #MeToo happened that I realised that I had blamed myself. I somehow thought it wasn't happening so much to other people and there must have been something about me that invited the harassment. I was totally shocked to realise I had believed that, as well as amused that I had somehow thought I was the only one getting so much harassment.

Goosefoot · 21/06/2019 15:03

I don't find it difficult to believe a bunch of young women would say something like that. I find them to be among the most aggressive of the woke in many cases.

Tanith · 21/06/2019 14:50

Anyone can be anyone on FB and social media. Are you sure that all these people are really the young women you believe them to be?

DancelikeEmmaGoldman · 21/06/2019 14:27

Damn. Posted on the wrong thread. Apologies and carry on as you were.

DancelikeEmmaGoldman · 21/06/2019 14:26

Where I used to live there was a little, unnamed lane. So the council invited the community to suggest names and then vote for their favourite.

Forever after known as Lois Lane. Grin

Goosefoot · 21/06/2019 13:43

Reading the twitter threads: as I understand it she isn't totally wrong. There are skeletons as she mentions where you can't tell the sex, on occasion.

I wonder if part of what's going on is this language of "a spectrum". Many people seem to take it to mean just, variations, or people who don't clearly fit in the usual categories. People don't realise that you can have a binary difference like sex but still have those who don't clearly fit into a group or seem to be outliers.

In my experience people who work in the sciences aren't necessarily better at thinking about language or even logic in a more careful way than others. Which seems odd but it also is so common that I wonder if the error isn't expecting too much from such people.

FeministCat · 21/06/2019 13:42

I searched memes which we all know is the ultimate answer to mysterious questions, and I see lots for both big girl panties and big girl pants/big boy pants. So I imagine just another more regional difference. Here as I said upthread big girl panties is said or used by both sexes (though I have heard big boy panties once or twice generally from one man to another man).

Goosefoot · 21/06/2019 13:38

Panties tends to be used especially (though not exclusively) for young girls underwear, so the implication with the saying is you need to grow up, as much as you can, even if you are never going to get all the way there.

andyoldlabour · 21/06/2019 13:36

Dr Alice Roberts, has in my opinion totally lost the plot. She is supposed to be an intelligent, scientifically trained person, who has now decided to abandon logic and reason, for the new religion of "tolerance and compassion" and then refers to the "misuse of science".
I think Dr Roberts is having a break from Twitter, and is totally getting owned on this thread.
There is some guy trying to tell @fondofbeetles (a developmental biologist and research fellow) that "sex is many things to many people, and there isn't a reliable scientific test for it" Confused

twitter.com/theAliceRoberts/status/1141460396223733761?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Etweet

TheInebriati · 21/06/2019 13:35

Would they say it to a trans person? I don't think so.

Goosefoot · 21/06/2019 13:35

I thought it might be a mixed metaphor, big girl panties + big dick energy. Probably not on purpose if so.

FeministCat · 21/06/2019 13:35

TheInebriati

And I have only heard big girl panties, never big girl pants!

FeministCat · 21/06/2019 13:33

Well, you can. It’s not like there is a ban on it. My mother moved from England to Canada when she was a teenager and still used more of the English wording or “slang” until she died at 59.

But different English-speaking countries develop their own slang and words for things. Even Canada differs from the US. Heck even regions of Canada differ from other regions of Canada, and same in the US. They are both big countries. In Canada we also have influences from many languages on our own language. I grew up in a region heavily influenced by Ukrainian culture for example, and with a Ukrainian stepfather, so lots of my “slang” or words for things has that background.

If you said trousers here where I am people would know it was a word, and they would know what you were referring to but they would think primarily of “dress pants” or suit pants/formal pants, because trousers are pants here (hence panties are mini-pants ha). You would not typically call jeans, leggings, etc pants or trousers here typically...they just get called jeans or leggings etc.

Here for underwear you get: panties, undies, underwear, ginch/gotch/gitch (regional slang mostly in prairies and Ontario), and who knows what else. People like my mother would say knickers and people knows what it means but it’s just not common vernacular. Where we grew up if she said jumper people would know she meant a sweater, but if you went more rural people would assume she meant a deer (because they jump over fences...). But when she asked a classmate for a “rubber” (eraser) as a teen they looked at her like she was nuts for asking in the middle of class for a condom!

Language is a fun and funny thing.

HorsewithnoHoldsBarred · 21/06/2019 13:32

Big dick panties.

Underwear worn by a big dick?

TheInebriati · 21/06/2019 13:19

I've heard 'big girl pants', not 'panties'.

ScottishDoll · 21/06/2019 13:16

Well it sounds ridiculous to me, and all because you can't use the word trousers across the pond Grin

FeministCat · 21/06/2019 13:14

Scottishgirl

No but “put on your big girl panties” is actually a saying here (said to both men and women), so I wonder why they chose “big dick panties” over “big girl panties”.

FeministCat · 21/06/2019 13:11

‘Panties' is an Americanism and so I would just assume the person who said it is an American male troll.

Panties is also used often here in Canada.

“Put on your big girl panties” is also a saying over here. It is supposed to be a bit of a cry to tough up and do what needs to be done.

I would not assume must be a male troll though. Women in my experience are just as likely to tell someone to “put on their panties” as a man, though I do confess it is the first time I have seen some one way “put on your big dick panties”.

ScottishDoll · 21/06/2019 13:07

Big Vagina Panties just doesn't have the same ring to it does it?

FeministCat · 21/06/2019 13:05

Isn’t it interesting their answer is to put in their big “dick” panties. That alone shows their own internal misogyny - it’s the equivalent of saying “man up”. Well, why not “woman up”? Or maybe they are promoting packers and admitting women will never be accepted as woman, they better try and be men!

Anyway, OP. Sounds to me like these young women are more concerned about being woke, have a lot of internalized misogyny, and probably are not competitive athletes themselves seeing their sports careers lost to men.

I am childfree too and it is always interesting to me when young childfree women will deny male oppression in one sentence, while talking openly about their hatred of the expectations on them to have children (though they don’t yet see it as the result of a patriarchal society and still will often blame other women for the pressure to have children).

A lot of them will hit the wall eventually, but that does not answer the short term. Again, if I were you I would call them out on their motivations for even using “big dick” panties in first place as illustrative of how they don’t even think women can compete with these men unless they pretend to be men. Ask them why they give so much power to the “big dick” over the vagina.

TheInebriati · 21/06/2019 13:03

'Panties' is an Americanism and so I would just assume the person who said it is an American male troll.

Would they direct the same comment to trans people? If they think it would be insulting then they shouldn't say it to women.

ScottishDoll · 21/06/2019 13:02

Critical analysis is a dying art. The more we can all do to promote active engagement of brain cells in language application the better Grin

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