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Original poster

Have mumsnet hq seen this?

104 replies

PutYourShirtOnMartin · 07/06/2019 14:25

😳😳😳

Have mumsnet hq seen this?
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TurboTeddy · 08/06/2019 21:36

HebeMumsnet
I'm so happy to hear it's the second option. Clearly you are far too cool to have your feathers ruffled by a bit of porn but when the apocalypse hits you will obviously utter the phrase "ah transporn, we've been expecting you" but now we need to talk voices. Will you go for a traditional Blofeld (bit predictable IMHO) or try to shake things up a bit?

I hope you don't mind but I have given it some thought and have concluded that the Queen would deliver the line rather well, more contempt than menace iyswim. I did experiment with Alan Carr and Nigella Lawson but as I'm sure you can appreciate it sounds far too salacious, as if they'd relished the prospect of girl dick, which is clearly not what we're aiming for here. Apologies if I've been presumptuous.

You've got a great sense of humour.

MNHQ
HebeMumsnet · 08/06/2019 20:47

Iz Hebez cat posting now, ladz. All your four-day chickinz are belong to me.

(Not touched a drop, birdsdestiny)

birdsdestiny · 08/06/2019 20:40

Grin. You have been drinking whilst in charge of the cat haven't you hebe.

Iggi999 · 08/06/2019 20:39

Don’t you have to be a member for a while before you can post photos? Maybe they are on here now trying to bide their time on Archers threads and parking wars.
Or were they going to post them as links, a la the random pics of Terry Wogan’s Cock that we all used to post?

FloralBunting · 08/06/2019 20:38

Oh, bravo, Hebe. Well played.

MNHQ
HebeMumsnet · 08/06/2019 20:37

Neither. We give a sharp yank on the chain, a toilet flush sounds, and a hatch opens beneath their feet, which drops them into a chute and slides them straight into Netmums.

(Just kidding. They get slid into the MNHQ basement where they live out their days repeatedly having to ask Gordon Brown which biscuit is his favourite, and all with only one roast chicken to survive on for the rest of eternity).

FloralBunting · 08/06/2019 20:24

Not a shark tank. Bad tempered tuna.

boatyardblues · 08/06/2019 20:15

Do banned posters drop through the floor into a shark-filled tank, Hebe? If not, that sounds a bit underwhelming TBH. I’d much prefer a big button with a choice of sounds like QI panellists get.

MNHQ
HebeMumsnet · 08/06/2019 19:47

It's not actually a button. It's a pull chain.

Needmoresleep · 08/06/2019 19:33

Would MN mods allow me to operate their ban button for a day...even an hour.

So cool to be guest ban button operater. Not quite like the nuclear button, but it would do, since I am not Trump.

ZebrasAreBras · 08/06/2019 19:07

We released the vipers into the grounds at 11pm.

I know I whinge sometimes, but MNHQ you can be so cool Grin

Wine Cheers women. My pearls are on standby.

LarryGreysonsDoor · 08/06/2019 18:31

Oh have I missed all the fun?
I put my liberty bodice on especially.

MNHQ
HebeMumsnet · 08/06/2019 18:23

Was completely serious about the cat hair @boatyardblues, but thank you! The cat hair struggle is real. (I actually think Justine only gave me the job because I already had the white cat. Made good business sense, I guess...)

boatyardblues · 08/06/2019 18:16

I have to say: MNHQ excels on the modding with humour front. 👌 Hebe

MNHQ
HebeMumsnet · 08/06/2019 18:12

We released the vipers into the grounds at 11pm. Looks like they saw any troublemakers off... That and BOW's pentangle.

I'm consumed with the need to know what the set up is at MNHQ. Is it all very techy and efficient like mission control and is there a countdown prior to the ban button being pressed or is there a lone MNHQ villain with a white cat, hidden down in the basement, enjoying their job as ban button pusher whilst manically laughing.

And TurboTeddy: Very much more like your second imagining there...

Prawnofthepatriarchy · 08/06/2019 18:01

Don't joke, Sexnotgender. I looked into all this shit for a couple of days a few years ago and it's grim. The whole point of cissyfication or forced feminisation porn is how violating and humiliating it is for a man to be forced to transform himself into a woman, portrayed as a pornified cumslut (not my word). The written fantasies were even worse. I would steer very clear of anyone who was aroused by it. It was repellent. Envy < not envy.

BernardBlacksWineIcelolly · 08/06/2019 17:01

Is there a Hentai forum we could flood with Archers discussion? I do like symmetry

I am so up for this. I stopped listening because of the Helen Archer coercive control storyline, but I'll totally come back for that. keep me posted!

Outanabout · 08/06/2019 13:58

I got a shock first time I heard it pronounced.😳

Sexnotgender · 08/06/2019 13:55

So disappointed in the lack of porn. These TRAs, always over promising and under delivering. I was looking forward to some #girldick

TinselAngel · 08/06/2019 13:53

Sal Volatile always sounds like it should have been the name of a character from the Sopranos.

ElGuardiandenoche · 08/06/2019 13:48

I say Bore that was a rather spiffing rhyme. Top hole old girl!

Catsrus · 08/06/2019 12:48

I googled too. Hmm. Now looking forward to being able to drop it into conversation and shock the offspring 😉

LangCleg · 08/06/2019 11:53

The potential porn apocalypse doesn't seem to have occurred so far. The night of the long... erm... (knives?) is over.

Perhaps it came too soon and you missed it?

Did you blink at any point?

TinselAngel · 08/06/2019 11:44

And if that fails Bore, flood them with porn.

TurboTeddy · 08/06/2019 11:33

Bore that is brilliant👏

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